Anonymous: It does excite me to go anal only. Not just because I was demanded but because it seems more enjoyable! Thank you for answering my question.

Then yes—if it excites you and you find it more enjoyable, I wholeheartedly encourage you to go anal only and stop using your pussy!

Enjoy and have fun with it!

Anonymous: I prefer anal and would be perfectly fine with being anal only. The wife loves both with vaginal taking the lead slightly. Through practice we’ve increased anal from once a month to 4x+, we do it especially when she’s on her period. I’m trying to get her to go all the way, but she’s not receptive. Any suggestions?

If she enjoys both and doesn’t want to give up vaginal, don’t push her to do so. You can try and see if she’d ever be open to a few weeks or a month of anal only just to try it out, but if not, don’t push it further.

Instead, focus on making sure she really enjoys the times that you do have anal sex. Express your appreciation for her ass and make her feel really sexy and desired when you have anal. Essentially, do the best you can to make anal fantastic for her and over time she may gradually want to start doing it more.

Most couples who end up anal only don’t just suddenly get there—anal only trial months can be a fantastic way to introduce someone to the idea if both partners are willing to try it, and sometimes it’s so much fun that they decide to keep going from there, but far more commonly, it’s a gradual approach over time with anal becoming more of a priority long term until they either naturally or consciously end up eliminating the vaginal. And not everyone gets there either, some people really value vaginal as well as anal. But focusing on her anal pleasure and trying to make it really fantastic for her every time won’t hurt anybody and she’ll appreciate it regardless of whether she ends up preferring anal over vaginal or wanting it exclusively.

Anonymous: First I just would like to say happy holidays and I love your blog. I’ve been having anal sex for a long time but for some of the men especially the last one I slept with wants to do anal only, he even demanded it. So should I give up vaginal 4ever?

Happy holidays to you as well, and thank you!

Do you want to go anal only? Does the idea interest and excite you? Does it satisfy your own desires? If the answer is yes to any of those, then you might consider trying anal only for a few months as a trial period of sorts. If you’re still enjoying it and having a good time with it at the end of that trial period, then consider making it more indefinite. I’m not really a fan of absolutes, like declaring (seriously, outside of a fantasy realm or dirty talk) that you’ll never, ever do something again and closing yourself off the the possibility of changing your mind. Instead, I advocate doing what works for you now, but if down the road it ever stops being fun and amazing for you, being open to change if change is what you need. If you end up never wanting vaginal again, then great—but if anal only ever stops being fun for someone and becomes a chore instead of a joy, then I think it’s foolish for someone to continue with it. And that applies to anything, including vaginal sex for some people. But I digress.

Don’t go anal only because somebody else demands it, do it because you want it.

Anonymous: What are the best plugs for training your ass for every day use? I’d like to start training my ass but I’m not sure which plugs to purchase. Thank you ❤️ love your blog

There aren’t really any “best” plugs, it all comes down to personal choice and what works best for you. I usually recommend training with fingers first, and once you can fit three fingers fairly easily, upgrading to a plug at that point—otherwise you’ll probably end up getting a plug that’s really small and both won’t stay in place very well and you’ll outgrow pretty quickly. Once you can fit three fingers, consider something in the 1.5″ maximum diameter range.

There are multiple quality options around this size, including but not limited to the Tantus Ryder, Doc Johnson Mood Naughty and the Implicit Creations Core Plug (these are all silicone plugs, but stainless steel and glass options can be very good as well—but they don’t have any give or flexibility to them, obviously, and so can sometimes be harder for beginners to get used to). Jeweled/”Princess” plugs are a popular first plug for a lot of people because they’re visually appealing, but a lot of people find that the round/sharp edged base can get uncomfortable after a while if you’re wearing them long term, and the neck is usually very narrow, so it doesn’t hold open the anal sphincter very much and isn’t as useful as a training plug.

I would avoid the super cheap options outside of silicone, glass or stainless steel. A lot of cheap sex toy materials aren’t very body safe and can smell bad and sometimes even cause a burning skin reaction, so it’s best to go with a good quality material from the start.

Once you have a plug, you may not be able to wear it long term just yet (or you might—everybody’s different). Start by wearing it when you masturbate. Then try keeping it in longer. If it starts to get too uncomfortable to keep in, take it out and try it longer the next time. Try sleeping with it in. The more you practice with it, the longer you’ll be able to comfortably fit it. If you go out with it in, you may want to carry a small bottle of lube with you to reapply if it starts to dry out/get absorbed and you need to add more.

Have fun and enjoy!

Anonymous: Anal Only September girl here again, this time with super happy news! I’m going to get ass”raped” by my Dom on Sunday and I’m sssssooooooo excited for it!!!!! Moral of the story every girl should do an anal only month 🙂

Congratulations, have fun! It’s not clear from what you’ve said if you ended up staying anal only after your trial month, or if you’ve returned to a mix but find yourself craving and enjoying anal more after doing it exclusively for a month.

Either way, I agree, every girl (and couple) should try at least a month of anal only. Many find they love it as a result, often after never even really considering it before that.

Hi, your post about “The Many Roads Leading to the Anal Only Lifestyle” is very true, I myself belong to two categories. I got into anal to stay a virgin until marriage, but then I fell in love with my sex friend. When we started talking about marriage, I told him about having vaginal sex after we’re husband and wife, but he didn’t want to hear about it – he’s actually not even into clitoral stimulation, even if he loves lengthily licking my asshole.

We argued about it for a few weeks, but then I noticed he was more and more dominant in bed. In fact, he’s always believed I was anal only because I liked it, and the idea anal was “forced” on me while I really wanted vaginal and clitoral sex obviously turned him on, especially since I’m still a virgin… Somehow, this misunderstanding made him much more passionate, sex got really hotter, and he also became more caring and protective with me.

The situation started to please and turn me on a lot, too. That was six months ago (I actually wrote to you about it in June), we got married in August. I’m still a vaginal virgin, obviously we’re still an anal only couple, and we’re also a dominant/submissive couple, mostly in bed but also partly in life. It’s crazy, because I got into anal to save my virginity for my husband so my marriage gets as perfect and romantic as possible, and it’s somehow what happened, but not how I had imagined.

Thanks so much for the followup submission. Congratulations on getting married, and I’m so glad everything worked out so well and in a mutually satisfactory way for the both of you. It sounds like you made the right decision to stay anal only!

Anonymous: Have you thought about staying a virgin ? Of course you could be a cumslut, but only your ass and mouth would be used.

virgin-cumslut: I have actually thought about being anal only. The idea seems hot plus I love have my ass stuffed 😉

spoiledlittleslut: When I first started following you I didn’t pay much attention to your captions because I incorrectly assumed that you would be pushing anal only as a way to better please men. I’m so happy that I was wrong! You’ve quickly become one of the blogs I go to to find relief from misogynistic posts ?

analsexonly: Thanks so much for the lovely message. I’ve been a fan of your blogs for some time as well.

I’m very much an advocate of equal opportunity anal, and recognizing the fact that there are many women who greatly enjoy anal as well, while trying to dispel the myth that women only do it to please men. There are certainly some who do, or who like that idea, including some who do anal only because they’re turned on and satisfied more by pleasing their partner than by their own physical pleasure, and I certainly don’t mean to suggest that those people are incorrect either or that there’s anything wrong with such enjoyment of service if that is what they want, enjoy and consent to. But it isn’t the primary focus of my blog—I do try to always try to portray a variety of approaches and appeals about anal and anal only, both for men and women—but around a central theme of mutual enjoyment of anal, especially female enjoyment, which some people still struggle to understand, it seems.

Because there are a lot of women who do enjoy anal. And a lot of others who don’t, which is perfectly fine too. Anal only isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay! But I want to give a positive impression of anal, an encouragement for those who are interested in the idea of anal only to try it on their own terms—because they’re curious about it and want to try it, not because they’re being pressured into it by anybody—and advice to help ensure that people curious about it actually enjoy it and discover something new and fun they can do, even if they don’t want to do anal only. I think it’s really unfortunate that so many people have bad first experiences with anal because of partners pressuring them into trying it, not knowing how to do it properly or how to ensure everyone enjoys it, and swearing off trying it again when they might actually really like it if it was done right. For that reason, I personally have a problem with the blogs who push the idea that women aren’t supposed to enjoy anal or that it’s supposed to hurt and that’s the whole point of anal. I hate that idea, and maybe some people get off on it as a fantasy and I’m not going to be critical of that, but I do think that pushing that message continues to do harm to the goal of more people trying it and enjoying it. Perhaps I’m overreacting there, though.

I personally am anal only because I prefer anal and always have, and I love women who also love anal on their own terms, not just doing it to please a partner. That’s very appealing to me. When I started this blog, I did it just because I really liked the idea of anal only, but then more and more people—men and women both—who also liked the idea started showing up and it kept getting more popular, and it was awesome to sort of be a voice for all these people who shared a similar desire or were actively living an anal only life, and a whole community has grown out of it—a generally very mature and respectful community, at that!—and I think that’s just really cool to see.

Anonymous: I’m 18, have a bf and like buttsex (I’m AO while not getting married), but I don’t know how to be sexy or use my anal abilities to make him happy cause I’m not soooo into assfucking. I don’t feel that “fire” in my butt and my brain stills considering my pussy as my primary sex organ. I feel terrible for cannot be like the buttgirls that I watch in your blog. Please, help me! I wanna be a buttslut, but my brain do not accept it! There is any hypno video ou technique that I could use? (I’m BR)

I don’t have any hypno videos or anything of that nature to help you, but I can offer you some advice and suggestions.

Do you masturbate anal only as well? If not, and if you masturbate vaginally, that is likely a contributing factor to why you feel a disconnect between your ass being your primary sex organ like you want, because you would still be using your vagina sexually. I would suggest masturbating anally at least daily, and no longer masturbating without something in your ass at the same time. This not only puts the focus on your ass where it belongs, but combining something like clitoral stimulation with anal stimulation on a regular basis really helps further associate the feeling of anal penetration with pleasure and can make it a lot more enjoyable for you.

Also, I would suggest no longer thinking of yourself as anal only until marriage—the fact that you phrase it that way puts an end point on being AO and still keeps the priority on your pussy as your primary sex organ, just not right now, and that may be contributing as well to why you have a hard time mentally thinking of your ass being the primary focus for you sexually. Even if you might end up being open to vaginal sex with a future husband, there’s no need to be concerned about that now if anal only is what you are now, and you want to get more deeply into it. Just identify as anal only.

Wearing a butt plug regularly is not only good to keep your ass in good shape and warmed up for sex, but it also helps draw your attention to your asshole throughout the time you’re wearing it, so you think about it more instead of your pussy.

This contradicts the above advice to masturbate regularly with your clit and anal penetration, but you might also consider stopping all clitoral stimulation as well as vaginal. This will boost your arousal, make you hornier, and any time the urge gets too great and you feel like you can’t resist, rub and finger and dildo your ass instead of rubbing your clit. Over time, this can further redirect and reassociate your pleasure centers and your urges anally instead of clitorally and vaginally, and it can also unlock much more intense anal pleasure and anal only orgasms. See this recent submission to the Anal Only Lifestyle blog for a reader’s firsthand account on the topic. If you already enjoy anal anal only, I definitely encourage trying a period of time without clit stimulation too. A lot of women become extremely dependent on their clit for all pleasure, and it can hide and prevent a lot of other sorts of pleasure and more intense anal only orgasms that can occur.

Anonymous: Lately my wife and I have been having much rougher anal sex. It’s amazing, but after I drop my load and pull out, there’s usually a bit of dripping out of her asshole that we’d like to avoid. Suggestions?

I think you left a crucial word out, unfortunately, but I can guess at what you mean. A bit of blood, or a bit of feces?

If it’s blood, try warming up more first, stretching a bit longer and a bit larger with toys before moving on to sex. Make sure you’re using enough lube. Whenever you encounter blood, stop and let it heal for a few days before trying again, just to make sure any minor injuries that may have occurred heal rather than turning into anything larger.

If it’s feces, try an anal douche/fleet enema before having sex. You usually don’t want to go too deep with an enema unless you go for a full deep enema and flush everything out—which you don’t want to do too often anyway. Also try having her wear a plug for half an hour or so before sex—in addition to helping warm her up, it can sort of temporarily “activate” the digestive system and move things along if things are close. If it’s just a bit at the end, though, I presume a minor douche would solve the issue.