Category: Anal Training

The use of anal play & masturbation techniques to further develop one’s anal abilities and prepare for anal sex. See also Anal Masturbation for posts specifically referring to the use of anal play & masturbation for fun and pleasure.

For more detailed information on anal training, see our Anal Training & Preparing for Anal Sex page.


Message: Anal Only to Stay Virgin?

EllaV: Hi, I found your site because I was searching for a solution to what I want and I think this might be it. I am a virgin and I really want to stay that way, it’s not because of my family or religion really, just something that I want for myself because I don’t like the idea of vaginal sex or getting pregnant until I’m ready, so I’d like to not have vaginal sex until then which will be a long time. But I also am really horny and have been dating so I would like to have sex, and anal only seems like a good way to do it.

I started fingering myself last week and I like how it feels. How long do I need to practice for until I can try anal sex with my boyfriend? He’s been pushing for sex lately and I want to be able to give it to him but I want it to be safe too!

I agree that it’s a good solution for staying a vaginal virgin and I definitely support the idea of not having vaginal sex outside of reproductive goals and only doing anal and oral otherwise! I think that’s a trend we’re going to be seeing more and more of so that we can start to take control of our lives away from the risk of reproduction through sex and turn sex into something that serves us instead through anal only. Sex is healthy and good and should be done regularly but it shouldn’t be vaginal, it should be anal.

I encourage fingering yourself until you can fit three fingers without it hurting and then get a butt plug around that thickness or a little bigger and work to be able to wear that. From there you could either try a dildo similar size to your boyfriend or just work towards anal together with him at that point if he’s patient and gentle and won’t just push it in.

Also be sure to talk with him about your goal to be anal only and that you want to keep your pussy virgin and unused and make sure that he’s on board with this idea as well. The last thing you want is him not understanding and going for your pussy instead.

Good luck and enjoy! You’re going to love being anal only.

Message: Stinging When Trying Anal?

Anonymous: When I have anal sex or use a butt plug, it stings and continues to whenever I try anything for a few days. Do you have any suggestions so I can try anal more often without it hurting?

It sounds like you may need to warm up a bit more, starting with lots of lube and gentle massage to gradually work your anus open with fingers, then progressing to a small toy. If it stings, you may be tearing it slightly by going too quickly.

Once you get to where you can use a toy without it stinging, try using it regularly, at least part of each day, and that will help you to stay relaxed and warmed up without risking injury. Even a minor injury can become irritated and last longer if it keeps happening or isn’t allowed to heal, so do what it takes to warm up without pain and you’ll enjoy long term satisfaction of anal sex!

Article: Learning to Love Anal Sex

It’s perfectly normal to be anxious or apprehensive about anal sex. After all, that area deals with some pretty, non-sexy situations. However, anal sex can be so pleasurable and is absolutely worth trying out, keep in mind things can go wrong if not done properly. Here are a few tips to make sure it has positive outcomes:

1. Talk It Over With Your Partner

Anal sex is not something that just spontaneously happens. Some people are very uncomfortable with the thought of anything entering their anus. This means, as a couple, you need to have a conversation and determine if it’s the right time for the two of you to try it out. This conversation should not happen fifteen minutes before trying anal sex! This is a conversation that should happen days, maybe even weeks before.

Continue reading on Slutty Girl Problems

Message: Can We Go Anal Only?

Anonymous: I really like anal sex but it makes me sore after so we don’t do it very often. The idea of being anal only really appeals to me though, and I’d like to try. Is there a way we can do it without me getting so sore?

Anal is one of those things, kind of like exercise in general, where doing it more often and on a more consistent schedule will help you to enjoy it without becoming sore in the same way. Ease into it: start once a week for a few weeks, then twice a week, and increasing frequency over the course of several months until you can do it as often as you like. At that point, it’s easy to make the transition to anal only!

Reddit: How Long Did It Take To Cum From Anal?

At the moment I can only cum from clitoral stimulation and anal, but I’ve read some posts on here where ladies have cum from just anal and I want that

An excerpt of several good responses:

I started to be fucked in the ass in July or August last year. Then closer to Christmas I started using buttplugs when I played with myself and earlier this month I used a vibrator and a dildo to play only with my ass! I kept playing when my body wanted to stop and then I squirted and came on the dildo! I was so proud I had to tell my Daddy (Dom) immediately

Little-CocoPops, /r/analonlylifestyle

My wife is the same way as you but unfortunately she doesn’t have the same hunger to cum solely from anal as you. We’re AO at this point because of some ongoing vaginal issues she’s having (which we suspect are due to her taking immunosuppressants for her autoimmune disease), but she needs her vibrator on her clit to cum, no matter what. She’ll have massive anal orgasms, but once she cums her psychological lust for anal dissipates, and she’s like “honey you gotta try to cum, I can’t go much longer.” Every time I broach the subject of “why don’t we try to slowly gradually train you away from your vibrator?” She gets pissed.

syncop8, /r/analonlylifestyle

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit

Message: Getting Virgin Girlfriend Into Anal

Ted: Hi! I’m Ted, a 26yo male VERY MUCH into anal. I knew I wanted anal only after watching my first porn video at 16yo. Thankfully, I’m attractive, with a boyish face that pleases the ladies, so I never had to compromise too much with vaginal or clitoral action. I’m either dating women who are already into anal, or getting women to try it.

My ultimate dream would be to be in a couple with a younger, complete vaginal virgin, who never had her pussy fucked and who barely/never stimulated her pussy at all (no clit/vaginal action), but who’d be available non stop for oral and anal action. Also, I’m into orgasm denial in the sense that to me, the only orgasms a woman should get are those gained naturally from anal.

Months ago, through friends, I met this cute 21 year-old who quickly grew fond of me. We had a few dates, we got closer, and recently, she confessed to me she’s a complete virgin, and she’d love me to teach her what sex is all about.

This is a golden opportunity. She’s beautiful, small, smart, innocent, funny, we have good things in common, she’s just my type of girl. I tried to question her about sex, and apparently, she has next to no experience, even by herself or through porn.

I’d like to know if you have any advice to help me get her into pure anal, no compromise. I’m very afraid to screw up and chase her away, even if she’s so much into me that IMO she could accept a lot.

I thought the better approach, rather than flat out say I prefer anal, would be to suggest anal for contraception, as a first step. I know she doesn’t take the pill, so I could say I can’t stand condoms and I’m scared to penetrate her vaginally. Then if I can get her hooked on anal, or at least be used to it, it’d be easier to go from there.

I’m already planning to use the content you have here, like the super well-made The Dangers of Clit Stimulation, to keep her from pussy action once she’s accepted anal.

What do you think?

I recommend being honest and up front and not trying to manipulate her, just present your case for preferring anal, why you think anal pleasure is so much better than vaginal, and how it can amplify her pleasure to keep things anal only from the start without distracting her pleasure with multiple sources and reducing both rather than focusing just on the one with the most potential for pleasure.

Present the benefits: greater pleasure, more intimacy and trust, and natural birth control. From there, you can talk about how it’s what you’ve always much preferred and how you think it’s really attractive and sexy that she hasn’t had vaginal sex and that you’d like her to try going and staying anal only with you and keeping her pussy virgin.

Article: How to Safely Stretch Your Anus for Anal Play

Do us a favor and try to do the splits. Go ahead, we’ll wait.

Can’t do it? Most people can’t without a lot of stretching and training first.

Turns out it’s the same for stretching your anus.

Like other muscles, your anal sphincter is only accustomed to stretching so far. If you want to loosen it up, it’s going to require some work.

Continue reading on Healthline

Bdsmlr: Going Anal Only as a Vaginal Virgin

We received this message through our Bdsmlr blog, and it’s being replicated here to be viewed by a wider audience.

Anonymous: Firstly I’m a virgin and only done oral. When masturbating I find vaginal penetration painful and not pleasurable compared to anal. Any suggestions on working on anal only by myself and then bringing it up to a future s/o?

Thanks for reaching out! I definitely recommend going anal only and am confident you will find it much more satisfying than vaginal.

A good way to begin is to simply stop vaginal penetration, which it sounds like something that should be easy for you if you find vaginal painful and not pleasurable anyway, and switch your masturbation routine to always include anal penetration, whether with fingers, a butt plug, or a dildo. Working to the point that you can use a life-size dildo regularly will ensure that you’re ready for anal sex when with a partner in the future.

As for bringing it up to a partner, it’s best to just be honest early on in a relationship. If you’re going to have sex soon, tell them that you’re anal only and have no interest in doing vaginal but would love to do anal and oral often. Many guys will be perfectly happy with that. And if someone isn’t, then he won’t be compatible with you anyway and it’s best to learn that early on.

For more information on these topics and others, the Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle goes into more detail, but also please feel free to follow up with more questions or updates if you have any!