Category: Vaginal Virginity

Anal sex has long been used as an alternative to preserve one’s vaginal virginity, but as that becomes culturally less important for people, vaginal virginity is becoming a matter of choice and preference instead, with women learning they prefer anal early on and deciding to go with anal as their default from the beginning and never bother with vaginal.


Message: I’ve Always Been Anal Only

Anonymous: I’ve always been anal only. When I was a virgin I loved the thought of just using my ass for sex and it made me so hot I decided to make it happen. I learned how to train my ass and the first time I had sex I told him I wanted to keep my pussy virgin and just do anal, and he of course had no problem with that, and I’ve stayed that way ever since. I had tried masturbating with my pussy before then, but I knew anal was better and have never been fucked vaginally and never will. I love it so much!

That’s a beautiful thing, thanks for sharing your love for pure anal only! You’re in inspiration for the growing anal only generation. There’s just no reason to ever have vaginal sex anymore for non-procreative purposes. Pleasure, intimacy and health are all better with anal.

Message: Anal Only Is The First Explanation Of Sex That Makes Sense

Anonymous: Honestly, this is the first explanation of sex I’ve heard that makes sense. The vagina for fun and pleasure and also babies just never made sense to me, vagina for babies and ass for fun and pleasure makes perfect sense and is obviously how it’s supposed to be. I’ve never let a guy fuck my pussy because it didn’t seem right and now I know why and I don’t want to start. So you can count me in as another anal only girl! Now that I know that name, it’s a perfect fit for me.

I’m glad you found the blog and realized how right it felt for you, then! A lot of people, in my experience, share similar feelings but don’t know how exactly to express them, or think that they’re unusual by having such feelings and don’t know how many other people there are out there with the same feelings. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting anything to do with your pussy and only enjoying anal. Welcome to the “club”!

Message: Being Open About Anal Only Is Everything

Anonymous: Hi I’m a virgin but I finger my own asshole in the shower since I was younger. It’s the only way I can feel any pleasure and I got so addicted to it I never want to have my pussy fucked. Like ever. This has become a huge kink for me. I’m an avid reader and because of your advice I now only watch anal porn and as soon I make out with a guy I tell him I’m anal only. Some of them don’t call me, but most of them love it. I think we are winning our space in the world and being open about it is everything

Thanks for sharing, it’s always good to hear from more anal only enthusiasts, especially from more vaginal virgins who strongly advocate for permanently avoiding vaginal sex. It’s something I’d definitely like to see more of!

I definitely agree with being open and up front about being anal only. The more people do this, the more normalized and accepted it will become, and the more other people will be encouraged to try it for themselves and discover how right it is for them.

Message: Alternatives to Lube

Anonymous: I’m freshly 18 (so still live at home and don’t have a job yet), im also a virgin so excuse the dumb question. since I’m unable to buy proper lube could I use baby lotion?

Unscented lotion can work. Avoid soap or shampoo. Coconut oil, shea butter and similar also work. Vaginal juices and saliva are also an option.

The original poster followed up:

the lotion I have is Johnson’s any lotion with shea & cocoa butter, is this safe to use?

It should be okay, but I would suggest trying a small amount first and gently rubbing it into your anus and then waiting a few minutes to see if there’s any sort of burning sensation from it. If not, it should be good to use. At first glance it seems to just be some oil with shea and cocoa butter mixed in, so it should be fine.

Message: Both of Us Anal Only

I don’t know about other guys but I’m definitely fully into penis denial since I started to try it a few years ago. I went back and forth with it at first but then I started to cum from just anal a lot more easily without it and then I was done with my dick, it’s so much sexier and feels right to be anal only without any part of my penis involved. I definitely encourage giving up both your penis stimulation and it’s so hot seeing cum just ooze out of my penis know I didn’t touch it at all. My gf loves it too she is also anal only and a vaginal virgin and we only use dildos since I don’t use my penis

Btw can you encourage more men to be anal only and maybe start a month just for them like dick denial December and can you give my gf some encouragement and reasons why she should stay anal only cuz she has said she wanted to give me her vaginal virginity

While it’s less common than the more traditional form of anal only where the man’s primary sex organ is his penis and the woman’s primary sex organ is her anus, there certainly are others who enjoy the same dynamic as you, where both partners are receptively anal only. If it works well for you, then that’s great! Anyone can enjoy receiving anal and anyone can come to prefer it, so it makes sense that being anal only is something that can appeal to women and men both in the same sort of way. There’s probably a bit more of a stigma about the idea of a man doing that still, unfortunately, so I suspect less people talk about it than practice or fantasize about it.

As for your girlfriend, you should tell her how much you love her being anal only with you and think it’s really sexy and wonderful that she’s a vaginal virgin. Tell her how you value the two of you staying anal only. A lot of anal only women regularly express how they wish that they had kept their pussy virgin and stayed anal only from the start rather than wasting time on their vagina in the hopes that it would be something worth doing. I understand the drive some people have to try everything and find out what they like best, but the reality is for most people, anal is so much better than anything else and by starting with anal, vaginal will usually end up just being a disappointment and something to regret. Committing to anal only is something that can always change in the future, but she can’t go back to being a vaginal virgin.

Message: How to Make Anal Hurt less

lolypoppyxdMy gf is willing to try anal, but she is a virgin in both holes. So my q is how do i stimulate her so anal hurts less (sorry for the bad English) ty in advance

Anal shouldn’t hurt at all, so avoid the mindset that it should “hurt less”, and instead focus on making her thoroughly enjoy it pain-free. Start by just incorporating some non-invasive anal play—lick her asshole, rub it gently with a lubricated finger on the outside, and talk with her about what she enjoys. Try combining anal penetration with clitoral stimulation and gently ease a lubricated finger into her ass, then make her orgasm while fingering her ass. Keep going up in size from there, with more fingers as she’s ready for them, then a butt plug and dildos. Once she can fit something about the size of your penis and she’s ready to go for it, try the real thing. Go slowly, let her control the pace, be prepared to pause if anything starts to hurt and let her relax around you. Once you’re all the way in and she’s ready, start to slowly move and build up speed from there. Communicate, and be ready to stop, slow or adjust if she needs it.

Message: Boyfriend Wants to Take My Vaginal Virginity

Anonymous: I’m a vaginal virgin, but I’ve been doing anal since I was 17 (I’m 23 now). I love it and I never want to change. My boyfriend, however, wants to fuck my pussy. I don’t really know what to tell him since he always brings up that I don’t know how it will feel :/

It sounds like you know what you want and you need to express that to him in a way that he understands. Tell him that you love having sex with him but that you really enjoy and value being anal only and keeping your pussy virgin and that isn’t something that you want to change and he needs to respect that. Perhaps you could come up with some sort of compromise, rather than vaginal sex, trying something else that he would like to do?

Message: Tips to Focus on the Right Hole

Anonymous: Hi, I’m a vaginal virgin hoping to never use my pussy. I was wondering if you had any tips to focus more on the right hole instead of always rubbing my clit? Thanks

Good for you!

To start with, don’t ever rub your clit unless there’s a finger, toy or cock in your ass at the same time. Make sure anal is always present and ideally the dominant form of stimulation. Once you get that habit going, then work to start reducing the clitoral stimulation to just enough to orgasm at the end.

If you get horny and feel an urge to rub your clit when you aren’t already playing with your ass, rub your asshole and finger it instead, or get out a toy and use it in your ass. The hornier you get, the deeper and harder you can fuck your ass. Take that energy your clit is trying to get you to give it and redirect it to your asshole instead.

If you still struggle with not touching it, you can try getting some numbing cream like Orajel and applying a small amount to your clit to remove sensation from it temporarily. Some women do so regularly or before masturbating or having sex in order to remove the urge and break the habit long-term.

Above all, remember your goals to be permanently anal only and to avoid all use of your pussy and clit. This is what you want, so always remember that and build up the discipline and willpower through your desire to stay anal only to self-enforce that goal.

Good luck! I’m sure you’ll do great!

Message: Anal Sex and Staying A Virgin Until Marriage, Part 3

Anonymous: Hi! I’m the “no vaginal sex before marriage” girl from May 27. Me and my boyfriend started having anal sex just four days after my message here, and it’s been great. Days before we started, I took the habit of cleaning up with small enemas and fingering my ass, to get past the “it feels weird” stage and get sure our first time isn’t messy, and things were perfect from the first time. Since the only sex we had before were handjobs and blowjobs, to me it felt like making love for the first time.

Wonderful! I’m glad to hear that you had a great first experience and have been enjoying anal sex together. A little bit of research and preparation before trying it the first time can make all the difference, and is something I highly encourage everyone who wants to try anal.

Despite how some view it, anal sex can be the most pleasurable and intimate way to have sex, so it should come as no surprise how well it works (and is better suited than vaginal, in my opinion) for making love.

Congratulations, and enjoy your new connection and outlet to share yourselves with each other.

Message: My Friends Thought I Was Weird When I Told Them I Was Anal Only

Anonymous: I wish I had found this blog sooner. I’ve been anal only since I lost my virginity at 17 (I’m 22 now) but all of my friends thought I was weird when I told them about it. I’d been a bit insecure about my sexual preferences, worried that I was broken, etc. But the AO community is so cool and strong. I’m so glad to find a group of people who love anal as much as I do!

You’re definitely not at all weird, you’re awesome! Being anal only is a fantastic choice, as is keeping your pussy virgin by choice. It’s something that’s really growing in popularity, and I suspect it’s going to take off as a highly desirable thing to do in the coming years.

Welcome to the community!