A question that comes up from time to time is whether or not you should include clit stimulation or other external stimulation of the vulva like cunnilingus or the use of a vibrator in your sex life if you’re anal only.

Most fundamentally, the anal only lifestyle is about the exclusion of vaginal sex and the adoption of anal sex to fully replace it. If you do that, you can consider yourself anal only.

Clit denial and denial of all vaginal stimulation, internal or external, can also be consistent with the anal only lifestyle, and can provide additional benefits for those who want to adopt those restrictions, but isn’t explicitly necessary to be anal only.

If you need or want clit stimulation or cunnilingus in order to enjoy anal sex or to be anal only long-term, don’t feel that you have to stop them in order to call yourself anal only.

If, however, you notice some of the negative effects that can come from clit stimulation, such as loss of arousal or mood swings, or want to focus on purely anal pleasure and orgasms, then it’s also perfectly reasonable to try going without and only relying on anal stimulation.

It’s a personal choice. Neither is right or wrong. Enjoy what works best for you.

Anonymous: I’m a girl and i don’t wanna be a boy but I just hate having a pussy. It’s been 5 years since I went anal only but during this períod i touched my clit many times, to avoid touching my clit i avoid getting turned on with pictures and videos. I don’t know what to do anymore i just wish i didn’t have a clit cause i think that someone is only 100% anal only if they dont touch their pussy ever again.

It sounds like you hate your pussy because it tempts you for stimulation and you find it hard to resist, which conflicts with your strong desire to be pure anal only.

I would encourage you to step back and reassess things a little bit. Yes, you have a pussy. Yes, it can cry out for stimulation and beg to be touched sometimes, but that doesn’t mean you need to use it. You have an asshole to play with instead. When you get horny and feel the urge to rub your clit, finger and play with your asshole instead. Do this multiple times a day and over time, your urges will shift away from your clit.

You can also use numbing gels like orajel, tape over your pussy, a chastity belt, backless panties, and a variety of other things to help yourself move away from your clit and towards being fully anal only without clit stimulation.

That said, everyone has their own definition of what it is to be anal only, and for many women, that includes some or even lots of clitoral stimulation. If you really struggle without your clit, maybe being anal only for you should mean no vaginal penetration but the occasional clit stimulation if you need to without feeling guilty about it. Ultimately, it’s up to you.

Don’t hate yourself or who you are or even parts of yourself. Yes, you may choose to be anal only, and that’s a great thing, which means that your pussy isn’t part of sex for you, but it is still a part of your body, and you can choose to love it in its own way, how it’s always empty and unused and shows how horny you are while you ignore it and play with your better hole instead.

So I love anal…a lot. Crave it. Was wondering if clit denial will make anal even better? My partner likes the idea of no clit stimulation, says not touching my clit but knowing how badly I want it makes him so hard. Any other guys feel that way?

Several good responses:

For me teasing my clit without cumming makes me desperate for anal and I cum harder from anal with some clit stimulation.

Just one more way to enjoy your partner and your body. Exploring your limits and finding out how many ways you’re body experiencing bliss is just an amazing journey. Teasing the pain/pleasure thread hold open so many great memories.

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Although I’m (F/28) not 100% sure on going fully anal only, I’ve been doing some research whilst anal training myself during isolation.

I suggested to my bf we try an anal only month and he said yes and I just want to say thank you to this subreddit for the information and personal experiences and stories that have helped motivate me more and for the recommendations.

I’ve done anal plenty of times before so I’m not a total rookie with it but I’m definitely keen to really dive into it (at my own pace… obviously).

Have definitely been enjoying it so far and even denying clit stimulation to help me achieve anal orgasms, Im also eagerly anticipating some new toys.

So, thank you!

A Reddit user responds:

Glad to see you taking steps to going anal only. You won’t regret this. Make sure to update us when the month is over and tell us how it went. I know you’ll be thankful you tried it

To which the original poster replies:

I shall update you in a couple of months, I think I’ve become obsessed. Not stopped thinking about it for days and I’ve sat with two different plugs in for the best part of the day and used a dildo for the first time. I think it will go well…

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For those who are anal receivers, all the time spent at home during the COVID-19 pandemic can be a great opportunity to train your ass and practice going anal only, even if on your own, or prepare yourself for a future anal only lifestyle by getting your ass ready for it through daily practice.

Set up a daily routine of anal fingering, masturbating with dildos, and butt plug wear, gradually going larger and for longer amounts of time as you get more experienced. If you need your clit to relax enough for it, use it, otherwise try going without it and seeing if you can learn to orgasm just from anal.

Be sure to check out our guide to anal sex and the anal only lifestyle for detailed advice on how to train for anal sex and adopt the anal only lifestyle.

And as always, share with us how your training goes, or any questions you might have!

Is there any tips on how to cum from anal only? Or is it different for everyone?

Just relax and enjoy it. Once you get past the initial stretch and mild pain (if you’ve learned to relax) it will automatically turn into pleasure. If you mentally want it and your not fighting it then you’ll feel it hit all the right spots deep inside you. From that you’ll release and should have a very strong orgasm. It’s part mental part physical. You have to want it and learn to relax and accept it in. Once you’re use to it you shouldn’t have any trouble. I hope you enjoy and have fun.

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Anonymous: Hello. I’ve been with my husband for about three years and a half now, we’ve been married for about two years. When we met, I had never done anal, but he gradually introduced me to it. At one point, we were doing it quite often (every time we had sex, in fact), and that’s when he confessed to me that he was anal only, and that he only did vaginal sex with me in hope it’d change and I’d agree to switch to anal only with him. I tried anal only for a few months, and I finally agreed to switch. He asked me for marriage very shortly after that (I was 28), obviously I agreed (he’s gorgeous, I’m very much in love, and I really enjoy anal). It was a bit strange to think I’d nearly have no vaginal sex for the rest of my life, but eventually it became normal to me.

My husband is a blue collar worker, and he’s usually very tired when he comes home from work, so we generally fuck about three to four times a week. With the virus outbreak, however, we’re both trapped home, and he’s fucking me every day – several times a day, actually, up to four times a day. It’s to the point I woke up in bed several times with his cock deep inside my ass, plowing me while I was asleep. I’m not used to this at all, but I don’t want to turn him down: sex is a very good way for him to get the stress out – so far, everything is going fine at home despite the situation, and I want it to stay that way. I tried getting him off with blowjobs, but he’s always going after my ass no matter what.

What could I do to avoid being sore, and to be able to take it all? Apparently, this crisis will last for quite some time, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to provide anal sex at that frequency for that long. So far, I don’t feel sore and I’m having pleasure, but I’m a bit worried. Are there creams I could use? Will I gape permanently? My husband marvels about the gape I have lately and he jokes about it, but I’m worried about my ass not being able to close properly in the long term. How could I increase my sex drive to get closer to his? I talked to him about it a bit, and he told me to stop touching myself (I still touch my clit during sex, even if it has always annoyed him) – would that change anything?

Thank you for your work and for your answer.

Thank you for sharing, and it sounds like you have a great anal only relationship. Well done to the both of you for being able to make it work.

Daily anal, even multiple times a day like you’re doing right now, can be entirely manageable and safe, so long as your body is ready and adjusted to it. If it doesn’t hurt and you aren’t sore, then there’s nothing really to worry about. Listen to your body. If you start getting sore, maybe try a little less for a couple days. But really, once you get to where you can have anal four times a day every day, or more, without pain or significant soreness, you should be able to keep doing that indefinitely. Yes, you will likely relax more as a result and have a bigger gape, because your ass is staying more warmed up, but that is not a bad thing and if you take a break from it, it will get tighter again. And remember, being warmed up and relaxed does not mean being loose. It just means that you’re more flexible and elastic and need less preparation. It sounds like your husband appreciates you being warmed up and gaping, so it’s not a bad thing at all! It won’t harm you, so long as you aren’t injuring yourself, and if it doesn’t hurt, you aren’t.

As for higher sex drive, definitely try going without clit play and focusing on pure anal pleasure. If you can orgasm just from anal, try doing only that going forward. If you can’t, try to learn by going without clit stimulation for a while. Or if you really need to cum, use your clit the last time you have sex at the end of the day only. You could also try edging with your clit but not using it to actually orgasm.

Good luck to the both of you, especially in this trying time. With any luck you’ll be able to use the time to get closer and further develop and improve your anal only lifestyle in ways that you’ll both be able to enjoy for the rest of your lives!

Anonymous: Ive been an anal only girl my whole life. I desire anal so much and it’s great. However, there were times I wish I have a penis instead of vagina since vaginal gross me out and make me feel wrong, I ignore my vagina and refuse to play with it. I’m a girl, it’s just that it would be better if I was born with a penis (that doesn’t mean I want to be a male)

I know there are other women out there who dislike their vaginas or having a vagina and wish they didn’t, so you aren’t alone in that. But I’d encourage you to just channel that into your love for anal and the anal only lifestyle. You don’t need to use your vagina, so just enjoy being anal only and live your life vagina-free.

A lot of anal only guys love the idea of women who have vaginas but don’t want to use them, and don’t. So if it helps you at all, you can try to think of the idea of being anal only and having an unused vagina that’s always going to stay that way as something sexy and enjoyable.

Hi everyone. I’ve been having more and more anal with my partner lately and he agreed to do a week of AO. It has been awesome and I’m going to ask him if we can try doing all of March! The last 2 times I didn’t touch my clit at all (I’m also not allowed to touch my clit unless he says okay) and I experienced what I think was an anal orgasm both times. I felt intense pleasure all of a sudden and it didnt have the same sharp peak as a clit orgasm but I did feel this incredible relaxed amazing feeling through my whole body afterwards.
I have also given into a long term fantasy of mine and finally ordered a real chastity belt from Fancy Steel. I can’t wait.

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Hello from Sweden, everyone!

I’m a middle aged woman living in a D/s relationship since many years. My husband is my Master and he’s in charge of most parts of my life – of which sex is one.

I found AOL on Tumblr a long time ago and immediately became interested in this lifestyle. My husband hasn’t been willing to give up my pussy though. Until a month ago, that is. Suddenly he declared that my pussy and clit was now off limits! Quite unexpected to me.

Since then we only have anal and oral sex. We both love it!

I’m here now to learn more about training my ass in all aspects. I’d like to stretch it in order to manage somewhat larger toys as well as increase my stamina so to speak. I’d like to be able to wear butplugs for a longer time (hours). I easily get sore. We have to be quite gentle all the time and I dream about being able to receive harder pounding once in a while.

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