Anonymous: Hey there! Im pretty new to this whole thing and I would like to know if it hurts (first time) Also is there going to be shit on my dick or something cuz thats kind of gross. But i would love to try Anal but find a way to make it fun and not disgusting 😛

The anus is a very sensitive area with muscles that are naturally quite tight when in their relaxed state. If you just try to shove it in, then yeah, it would cause pain to the recipient. In addition to using lubricant, you have to warm up and relax the anal muscles by opening it up gradually—start small, with something like a single finger, and slowly increase the size, two fingers, then three, etc., until ready for the size of your penis. Use of toys like butt plugs and dildos can also be useful when preparing for anal sex.

As for cleanliness, you should first accept that if you’re going to be playing with anal sex, encountering a bit of fecal matter from time to time can happen. Accept that, don’t make a big deal out of it or shame your partner for it, and move on. But that can be mitigated through multiple means—a balanced diet with a healthy amount of dietary fiber, going to the bathroom an hour or so before having sex, and if so inclined, using a small enema/douche to just lightly flush out the rectum prior to sex.

bellegirl: I convinced my husband to go anal only. It’s just for the month of January, but it’s a start. I am absolutely loving it. I only hope he’ll learn to love it as much as I do.

Congratulations, that’s wonderful! I’m glad you’re enjoying it, and I hope he’ll see how much you love it and want to keep going with it too. If he doesn’t, though, you can always try for another month of it at a later time, and keep slowly working towards doing it more often.

Anonymous: I was wondering if you have any anal lube recommendations. I have been using Forbidden by Adam and Eve because that’s what came with the toys I was gifted a few months ago. Sometimes this one burns a bit, and I am almost out, so any suggestions?

There are a lot of good lubes out there, each with their own advantages and disadvantages. Some, as you’ve noticed, can cause irritation or burning sensations for some people. Ultimately it ends up being somewhat personal choice as far as which will be best for you. I don’t have specific brand recommendations, but I can give an overview of different types of lube.

• Water-based lube is generally safe for most people and applications, but can vary significantly and while some can cause a burning sensation, others will not. You may simply have to experiment with small amounts of several until you find one that works for you. The thickness and consistency can vary between different water-based lubes as well, with some thin and runny, and others thick and gel-like.
• Silicone lube is long-lasting and very slippery, and is a favorite of many for that reason, but it isn’t compatible with silicone toys—it can partially bond to them and create a gummy, sticky mess.
• Coconut oil is a semi-recent favorite, and comes both in the form that’s solid at room temperature, and a fractionated liquid form. It’s all-natural, smells good, and works great as a lube. As with many oils, it can cause latex condoms to degrade.
• Albolene is a moisturizing makeup remover that some enjoy using as an anal lubricant. It is also incompatible with latex condoms.

Hey love! I just wanted to stop by and tell you how much I absolutely ADORE your blog. I was married to my husband in 2013 and anal was never something we really discussed, until nearly two years into our marriage. At this point, I had brought up to him that I may be interested in trying some things involved with my ass, but no penetration. Several things led to another and penetration did in fact occur, but that is not the point lol.

I was raised in a devout Roman Catholic household and, for a very long time, held the values associated with that upbringing very close and very dear to my heart. Anal sex, to me, used to entail total blasphemy, sins beyond comprehension, and all the rest. This religion no longer plays a part in my life and I have grown substantially from that way of thinking and cherish anal sex as an implement by which I can utilize to vastly refine my sex life with these new, and admittedly much more satisfying, experiences. In my newfangled delve into the anal only lifestyle, the many articles and information available via your blog has been invaluable in, not only reassuring my fears and insecurities, but going further to better equip me with the knowledge to succeed on the highest possible level.

In closing, I would like to reiterate my most sincere thanks for making all that you have here available for those who seek it.

Best to you and yours!

Thank you! I’m glad you’ve found it helpful.

Anonymous: are numbing gels safe? and how long do they typically last? I’ve been curious about experimenting with some on my clit so that anal is the only way I can get pleasure, but I don’t want to permanently lose sensation or anything

I am not a doctor, and asking a doctor would be the appropriate thing to do, but it appears to be safe in small concentrations, and I personally haven’t heard of it causing any permanent loss of sensation.

NPNWife: Been awhile since I checked in! We decided to continue going anal only for the rest of 2016. And after having a couple really deep, intense conversations about it, we decided to make our New Years Resolution to be 100% anal only—no vaginal anything, no clit touching, no orgasms for me unless I can have them anally—for all of 2017. My husband was in my ass when the ball dropped and he’s been in me 3 times since. It feels liberating giving up my pussy/clit for him this way.

Congratulations, sounds like an excellent choice for the both of you. A few months ago when you were just going to do anal for the first time as your anniversary gift to your husband, could you have imagined that this is where you’d be now?

naughtywhore12: Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to never have my pussy used or touched again. How it would feel to be anal only and have my pussy only seen as a pretty decoration

Maybe it’s time to find out.

The Anal Only Lifestyle community existed on Tumblr and IRC at the time of this post. The Tumblr blogs and IRC channel are no longer active. Join our Discord server instead.

analfeelsgood: I’ve been having some insomnia lately, and tonight’s been one of those nights. Plus, I was feeling a little horny, but DH is asleep.

So I decided, what the hell, I’ll look at some porn and play with my ass a little and see where things go. A fingertip, at first, playing with the hole, then pushing in to the first knuckle and rubbing and finger-fucking myself. Just slow and gentle-like. Normally, this would be foreplay. But it was feeling really unusually good tonight for whatever reason, so I kept with it, adding a second finger. Just letting myself relax and enjoy the feeling of a slow fingering, and imagining myself as the woman in the video.

It was feeling better and better, this slow build-up – and, all of a sudden…. I came, just from that. And kept going, and came again, and again. Six times.

I have had anal orgasms before, and when I do have them they’re usually multiples. But I’ve never come just from fingering myself before. Not my ass or my pussy. I didn’t think I could do it.

That was like 10 minutes ago, and I’m still feeling shivery from the aftershocks. Fucking hell.

Anonymous: I love anal so much that I need to dp myself with toys cause vaginal sex doesn’t always get me off but my man doesn’t really want to do anal. What’s a way to convince him? And yes I have talked to him and he knows I need it. It’s rare if he will add toys to the mix, I just want a nice cock up my ass instead.

Talk to him about why he doesn’t want to do anal. Figure out why he doesn’t want to do it as much, especially if he knows that you need it to really enjoy sex. Is he grossed out or turned off by it, does he not like the necessary preparation, or is it something else?

In the meantime, make your masturbation anal only and wear a plug in your ass during sex if he won’t use a dildo on you anally.