Category: Anal Advice

Posts containing advice about anal sex and the anal only lifestyle. For more general anal advice, see our Anal Sex Advice and Guide to the Anal Only Lifestyle page.


Message: How Do I Stay Anal Only?

Cassie: Hey, I’ve been wondering lately how I can stay anal only and I wonder if you have any ideas. I’ve never had vaginal sex and I don’t want to, I love anal and being anal only because it’s what I’ve always done and I like how it feels and makes me feel and it’s natural and best for me plus I don’t get pregnant but can have sex all the time still.

But I’ve met some guys lately who have really been pushing me to do vaginal and to lose my virginity and I really don’t want to but I really like the guys too. I’d like to stay with them but do just anal. Is there a good way I can convince them that anal only is better?

Stand up for what you want. If being anal only is what you want, don’t let a guy pressure you into doing something that you don’t want to do. If you want a long term anal only relationship, a guy who wants vaginal from you and doesn’t respect your desires isn’t a guy you want to be in a relationship with anyway.

All relationships have give and take, but it’s also fine to have your own needs and requirements and hard limits, and if being anal only is important to you, it’s perfectly sensible for vaginal sex to be a hard limit in your relationship. Be up front about that with partners and if they respect it, great! If not, there are many other men out there, some of whom will share your same desires and love that you want to be anal only!

Message: Vaginal Sex for Special Occasions?

Anonymous: What are your thoughts on “vaginal sex just on her birthdays”—that is, not being AO once per year?

Everyone can interpret the anal only lifestyle in different ways and make it work for them how they want, but personally I’m advocate for the purity of true anal only, and committing to a better life without vaginal sex and not going back to it.

That said, some anal only women have tried vaginal again after a year or two of anal only and found that it further strengthened their commitment to being anal only because in contrast with the intensity and passion of anal they found vaginal to be boring or downright unpleasant when trying it again. So there may be advantages to trying it at times—not as a treat, though.

Message: Anal Only During Pregnancy

Anonymous: My husband (34M) and I (29F) have been in a relationship for 10 years, married for 2. I’ve been attracted to anal since a teenager (the first time I masturbated was anally), but my husband is a pretty vanilla kind of guy, so it took a while to convince him to fuck my ass. That was some 6 years ago I think. Since then we’ve been having some anal occasionally (definitely much less than once every 2 months) and it’s always been me initiating.

Anyways, in April we got pregnant after a very long spell of no anal to achieve conception and my doctor forbade vaginal sex due to some complications. Oral was also out of the question for me (and still is) due to extreme all-day sickness that sent my gag reflex into overdrive. As a result, we’ve been sex free for 3 months and now that my all-day sickness is going away, my husband finally proposed by himself that he fuck my ass!

So we had a talk and told him that I’d gladly have regular anal sex with him, as many times a week as he wants. It’s been a week since then and he’s fucked my ass every other day, completely ignoring my pussy. He won’t even touch my clit, which I find extremely hot (so I stopped touching it as well, hoping to achieve pure anal orgasms). He just lubes his cock and goes straight for my ass. It’s like my pussy doesn’t even exist for him now! It honestly feels like I’m living the dream!

I hope those anal only months will tip the scales and make him want more of it after the pregnancy is over, although I won’t even dream that he’ll want to stay anal only. I know he loves my pussy too much.

I never expected that getting pregnant would make my anal only sex fantasy come true!

Congratulations! That’s wonderful that you’re living your anal only dream finally and that it seems he’s happy with the arrangement as well and is committed to ignoring your pussy and clit entirely at least in the moment. You must be loving it, and I hope that you update us with more details on how things are progressing since you first shared this.

Make sure to let him know regularly how much you love him in your ass and how happy you are to be his anal only wife and he may very well be happy to keep ignoring your pussy and keep you purely anal only even after the pregnancy is over. It would be a shame to waste such a wonderful streak that you both enjoyed just because it’s technically possible to return to vaginal despite anal being better for you both. Maybe help him to also see that just because he loves your pussy doesn’t mean he has to fuck it, and not fucking it and using your ass instead can be a stronger sign of love.

Message: Want to Try No Pussy November but Not Sure Where to Begin

miceandorratz: Hi! Know you’re on hiatus so feel free to answer whenever.

I found this blog a while ago and when I found out about No Pussy November I got really excited to finally start exploring anal stuff, especially now that I have friends (and probably more importantly the finances) to support me.

I’m not exactly sure what to do to start, though? I know November is a while’s off when I send this ask, but if I wanna buy any sex toys for the month I wanna do it beforehand. There’s no “anal training regimine” out there (I get it’s because I should go at the pace I feel comfortable with, but I wish there was something out there giving me a little more direction) so I’m not sure if I should get an anal training kit or just a lotta lube or what. Even between anal training kits I’m not sure what material to get it made outta!!

If you have any advice on what to do I’d appreciate it, all I really know that silicone lube is the preferred anal lube iirc. Any idea on if and what sex toys to bother with, general idea of how long to play with yourself, etc would be really appreciated. I don’t even have preference on price I’d just appreciate some direction.

Thanks for reading, hope things get easier for you! I’ve admired this blog for a while and stuff.

Glad to hear that you’re interested in anal and trying No Pussy November!

I suggest starting with lube and fingers and then getting a butt plug and dildo to try further from there. If you haven’t read our Guide, give it a look—it has a lot of advice on these topics.

Ultimately, though, the motivation and desire to get started is more important than exactly what you use. Most things will work, some better than others, and sticking with it and working on training your ass and ignoring your pussy are what will bring you success in the anal only lifestyle above all else.

Message: Anal Only to Stay Virgin?

EllaV: Hi, I found your site because I was searching for a solution to what I want and I think this might be it. I am a virgin and I really want to stay that way, it’s not because of my family or religion really, just something that I want for myself because I don’t like the idea of vaginal sex or getting pregnant until I’m ready, so I’d like to not have vaginal sex until then which will be a long time. But I also am really horny and have been dating so I would like to have sex, and anal only seems like a good way to do it.

I started fingering myself last week and I like how it feels. How long do I need to practice for until I can try anal sex with my boyfriend? He’s been pushing for sex lately and I want to be able to give it to him but I want it to be safe too!

I agree that it’s a good solution for staying a vaginal virgin and I definitely support the idea of not having vaginal sex outside of reproductive goals and only doing anal and oral otherwise! I think that’s a trend we’re going to be seeing more and more of so that we can start to take control of our lives away from the risk of reproduction through sex and turn sex into something that serves us instead through anal only. Sex is healthy and good and should be done regularly but it shouldn’t be vaginal, it should be anal.

I encourage fingering yourself until you can fit three fingers without it hurting and then get a butt plug around that thickness or a little bigger and work to be able to wear that. From there you could either try a dildo similar size to your boyfriend or just work towards anal together with him at that point if he’s patient and gentle and won’t just push it in.

Also be sure to talk with him about your goal to be anal only and that you want to keep your pussy virgin and unused and make sure that he’s on board with this idea as well. The last thing you want is him not understanding and going for your pussy instead.

Good luck and enjoy! You’re going to love being anal only.

If You Haven’t Tried Ass To Mouth, Here’s Why You Should

Even among the more experienced anal lovers and anal only enthusiasts there are those who are hesitant to try performing oral sex after anal sex. As such, there are many who miss out on the joys and benefits of doing ass to mouth!

Common concerns include fears that it is unhygienic and unsafe, or that it’s unpleasant and will taste bad. However, so long as you take basic precautions to have clean anal sex and only perform it on partners who have penetrated yourself, there are few health or safety concerns. Similarly, most people who do it find that it actually tastes really nice when clean and genuinely enjoy doing it.

Ass to Mouth is Sexy and Fun!

For many people, the appeal of ass to mouth is that it really turns them and their partner on. Part of that can be due to its perception as something that not as many people do, while another aspect is the general appeal of sexual openness and open-mindedness, where someone willing to put their partner’s penis in their mouth after it’s been in their anus becomes more attractive and appealing as a result.

A lot of women who start doing it say that it makes them feel sexier and turn them on, so it’s not just about pleasing your partner—it can be lots of fun for you too!

It Can Taste Great Too!

The taste and flavor, despite what one might expect, is actually very good if you’re clean. It can have an earthy and sweet taste to it, and women who do it regularly find themselves getting addicted to it, not just to the sexy and slutty act, but to the flavor itself.

It Boosts Intimacy Further

Anal and going anal only already relies heavily on trust and results in significant increases of sexual intimacy as a result, and ass to mouth just takes that a step further, with a very open expression of acceptance of one’s own body and of each other as you share even further by adding oral after anal into the mix.

Message: Orgasms in the Anal Only Lifestyle

Anonymous: Dear Sir

I wrote to you last June asking for advice on becoming anal only for my Master. First, a huge thank you. Your advice was great and i am officially an anal only slut since April. It feels amazing to say that and my Master is so proud of me. Second, i would like to get your opinion on something. What is your stance on orgasms in the anal only lifestyle? My Master never allowed me to orgasm freely and always made sure i earned it. But since i am anal only it feels wrong to ask for clitoral stimulation (my only way to orgasm). I still want to orgasm but it just does not feel right. Do you have any advice?

Thanks for your guidance and your blog. 

humbly honey 

Thank you for following up! You’re quite welcome, and I’m glad to hear that you have decided to officially go anal only and are loving the experience! Ultimately, that’s what matters most, that you and your partner want it and are happy with it, and if so, then by all means, being anal only is what you should do!

As for orgasms, I’m all for them personally, but each person has their own individual preferences and goals. Excluding clit stimulation can certainly help with amplifying anal pleasure and arousal even further, and if that also works with your dynamic of orgasm denial, then I encourage continuing to explore it further. You may discover that after an extended period of time without clit stimulation, you can start to orgasm from anal penetration on its own!

Article: Moms Are Confessing About “Butt Stuff”

For some moms, anal sex is still a big ol’ mystery they might be ready to solve…and for others, well, they’re pros

No matter how you like your salad tossed, there’s a mom out there who’s done it and is ready to help anyone who’s curious about…”butt stuff.” Anal sex and foreplay are a very common part of the bedroom scene for many couples — and sometimes, you don’t even need a partner to enjoy it!

Some moms are very into it — these are the pros. The people who know exactly how to utilize their rear in the right way. Some moms are more novice and are just exploring their own curiosity about what you do, how far you can go, what they like, what’s a big NO, etc.

Continue reading on ScaryMommy

Message: Stinging When Trying Anal?

Anonymous: When I have anal sex or use a butt plug, it stings and continues to whenever I try anything for a few days. Do you have any suggestions so I can try anal more often without it hurting?

It sounds like you may need to warm up a bit more, starting with lots of lube and gentle massage to gradually work your anus open with fingers, then progressing to a small toy. If it stings, you may be tearing it slightly by going too quickly.

Once you get to where you can use a toy without it stinging, try using it regularly, at least part of each day, and that will help you to stay relaxed and warmed up without risking injury. Even a minor injury can become irritated and last longer if it keeps happening or isn’t allowed to heal, so do what it takes to warm up without pain and you’ll enjoy long term satisfaction of anal sex!

Talk to Your Friends About Anal Only

Are you someone who enjoys anal sex and the anal only lifestyle and practices it yourself in your personal life? Has going anal only changed your life for the better and made your sex life more rewarding and fulfilling?

Why not talk about it with your friends as well and encourage them to try it too? If they haven’t tried anal yet, give them advice on how to do it properly. If they enjoy anal regularly but also do vaginal, have them try a month of anal only to start learning why it’s better to be anal only rather than just doing anal along with vaginal.

In the end, you’ll not only help others discover the joys and benefits of anal only, you’ll have a group of friends who can all support each other in your collective anal only life.