Anonymous: So, I’m a virgin. The most I’ve done is gave one guy a handjob while I was still in highschool. I do masturbate but I’ve never used a dildo, just fingers, and I’ve probably fingered my ass almost as many times as my pussy. I am considering keeping my vaginal virginity and going anal only. I’m sure when I do have sex with a guy I won’t have a hard time finding a guy who wants anal. I want your opinion, should I try to stay away from vaginal as long as possible or do that first before I go for it?

My opinion is that you should avoid vaginal entirely and just focus on anal and anal pleasure. It will be a lot more rewarding and enjoyable in the long run, doing so, and there are many benefits to being anal only from the start. It’s obvious the idea interests and appeals to you, given that you reached out to ask about it, so why not just decide to go for it and start focusing on just anal masturbation and sex going forward? It doesn’t hurt anything, and it doesn’t limit you from changing your mind in the future, while losing your vaginal virginity isn’t something you can choose to go back from. Though it’s not the biggest deal in the world, I do very frequently hear anal only women express the regret that they didn’t go straight to anal only and keep their pussy virgin.

Anonymous: Hello. I want to stay a virgin until marriage, and I’m worried about my hymen keeping intact, to the point that I refuse any contact near my pussy (I don’t masturbate). My current boyfriend has big sexual needs, so I agreed to give him handjobs then blowjobs. Now he wants to move to anal sex, but given his needs, I’m worried that frequent anal sex will somehow cause my hymen to tear open. Can that happen? I want to be clean, do frequent but small enemas cause damage? He directed me to your blog.

Hi! Becoming anal only can be a great way to avoid vaginal sex and keep your vaginal virginity, whatever your motivations in doing so, and being able to have great sex.

It seems quite unlikely that anal sex would cause any damage to your hymen, but everyone (and their hymen) is different, and some women can lose theirs just through physical activity like sports, while others can still have theirs intact after having vaginal sex. There are a lot of myths that surround the hymen, and I would suggest reading up on it more if you haven’t already.

Make sure that this is something that you want to do as well, not just because your boyfriend wants sex, and if you decide to go through with it, I highly suggest that both of you do research on how to have anal sex properly, how to warm up and prepare for it, and how to enjoy it.

Regarding enemas, it won’t hurt you to just use a small amount of warm water just to flush out the rectum. You want to avoid doing deeper enemas fairly often, both because that ends up getting into a much more complicated and long process, and because you don’t want to disrupt your intestinal flora that help with the digestive process. But just in the rectum itself to flush it out with a small amount of water several times in a row is fine if you feel it’s necessary.

Anonymous: I’ve never had my pussy fucked, and my boyfriend has no interest in anything but anal, I take his fingers daily, but I’m nervous about the size of his cock hurting me. Is it really the most natural way?

It’s definitely the best way—once you get used to it, it’s far more pleasurable and intimate, it’s a lot sexier, and it has other benefits like natural birth control. Keep your pussy virgin and focus on maximizing anal pleasure and skill. You won’t regret it.

Just keep practicing and training and work up to being ready for his cock with more fingers, and add some other toys into the mix too. Butt plugs, dildos, etc. If you’re comfortable with the number of fingers you can fit currently, keep pushing that limit of what size you’re comfortable with on a regular basis and with a gradual increase in size like that, you’ll be able to get to the size of his cock before very long. Once you can fit a toy similar in size to him, you should be ready to try it with him.

That’s the safe way to do it and avoid pain or discomfort. Not everyone needs to go through quite such a gradual process, and a lot of people will just warm up the best they can and go slowly with their partner until they adjust, with a few moments of discomfort at first, which often fades quickly and turns into pleasure. Whatever approach you do take, just be sure to stop or pause if anything becomes particularly painful. Done right, it shouldn’t hurt, and if it does, you probably need to warm up more first.

Let us know how it goes once you do try it, and ask any other questions if you have any!

The original version of this post on Tumblr received the following response.

alwaysanalblog: The above young lady has a great future ahead of her with a mature and sensible boyfriend to show her the way. Naturally he has no interest in anything but anal, but more than that, he cares for his girlfriend so much that he wants her to enjoy all the benefits that anal will bring.

Anonymous: Hi I’m a girl and a virgin and I’m interested in anal but I don’t really know how to get started. I also wanted to know about anal orgasms if it’s not too much trouble to ask. I also really like your blog!

Hello, and thank you!

The key with anal when starting out is to start small and slow and gradually build from there. If something hurts or feels uncomfortable, back off and try more slowly or with something smaller.

The anus doesn’t self lubricate much for most people, so you’ll want to add some sort of lubrication whenever engaging in anal play or sex. Real sexual lubrication is often best, though you can experiment with other things—natural vaginal lubrication, saliva, coconut oil, etc.

Most people are naturally fairly clean in their rectum except right when they need to go to the bathroom, so long as they have a fairly balanced diet. A small, quick flush out with warm water using an enema/douche bulb or a squeeze bottle of some sort can be used to flush anything else out if you want to make sure you’re fully clean. Small amounts is key here, you don’t want to use a large volume of water and get it beyond the rectum, which can end up causing more of a mess.

To begin with, just try a lubricated finger. Rub gently around the outside of your anus and across it, until you feel yourself relaxing and opening up a little bit, then slide it gently inside. If it hurts, back it out and rub outside again before trying again. Repeat until it’s painless. Once one finger feels totally comfortable, try two fingers instead, and keep repeating as desired. Spreading your fingers apart can help stretch the muscles for the next size, too.

Once you’re comfortable with several fingers, you might want to get a dildo and a butt plug to start using. Butt plugs are fun to wear around in general, but also as part of masturbation or during other sexual activities, and they provide a sort of passive stimulation and training/stretching. Dildos are, of course, more active and can be used for anal masturbation.

As far as anal orgasms go, everyone’s a bit different, but the same principles apply for any sort of penetration-based orgasm—as you explore anal penetration and stimulation, see what positions, angles and depths feel particularly good to you and feel like they might be able to grow into an orgasm, and focus on repeating that, building the sensation towards an orgasm. You can also of course combine anal penetration with clitoral stimulation for a different sort of orgasm, which tends to be far more pleasurable than just your clit on its own, though if your goal is an anal only orgasm, clitoral stimulation can interfere/distract from reaching that point. Anal orgasms often take more time to reach but are also often more rewarding.

Hope that helps some! If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.

Anonymous: I am another vaginal virgin saying hello. I have seen your releases in Anal Only April and although I have only had anal sex for 3 years, I have decided this month to make it permanent. Many thanks.

I’m glad to have helped inspire you to choose the anal only lifestyle! It really is the best way to be, and your using Anal Only April to make that decision for yourself going forward is a great honor.

Anonymous: When I first tried sex my bf couldn’t fit into my pussy without it hurting a lot, so we didn’t really get anywhere until I told him to try my ass and that was a lot easier and what we ended up doing. We tried my pussy again a few times but it never worked so anal is what we stayed with, and all I’ve done since. So I guess I’ve always been anal only, but I didn’t know it was a thing people chose to do until I found your blog. That’s pretty cool, I think I’m going to call myself anal only now too.

That’s great, glad you were able to discover that you’re far from alone in such a scenario and that it’s actually a really positive and sought-after way to be for a lot of people. Vaginal sex just isn’t very good anyway, so you aren’t missing anything at all if you’re already anal only.

Anonymous: So I have a long distance relationship and I will see my boyfriend in April. Since I am currently not taking any birth control pills we decided that he should take my anal virginity (with a condom ofc, u never can be too careful). But here it comes folks: I am a vaginal virgin. And truth be told I am following this blog since one year or so. Maybe I can stay anal only if he likes the idea and I show him this! Just wanted to share this with u! Xoxo from Germany Liz

That sounds like a great idea, and something you clearly seem to want for yourself based on what you’ve said here and the fact you’ve been following this blog for so long. No doubt you’ll be staying anal only for quite a while at least if you’re going to begin with it, and there’s no need to commit to it immediately from the start (unless you want to!). You can give yourself the chance to give it a serious try for a while and then decide later in the future whether you want to continue anal only. (You probably will!)

Lately, a number of women who are vaginal virgins have shared their stories, experiences or desires maintaining their vaginal virginity while being actively anal only. You can view those posts via the #vaginal virgin tag. However, more recently, there was a post on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum wherein a member has a new girlfriend who is a vaginal virgin but who would like to lose her virginity and try vaginal, while he prefers her staying an anal only vaginal virgin.

So I’ve been seeing this girl for about s month and three days after meeting she told me she was a techniqual virgin. I like this and we’ve only had anal sex since. She wants to have a go at vaginal and part of me didn’t want to let her but to get haveing anal.

Follow the conversation from there to see other people’s responses, more details, and to share your own perspective.

Anonymous: OMG I love the idea of anal only so much and after seeing how much you encourage virgin girls to go anal only I really want to do it too! I guess I already am but before I always thought I’d use my pussy eventually. Now I just want to stay with anal and keep my pussy special and virgin.

Yay! It’s becoming a trend! And anal only vaginal virgins are the best trend there could be, so of course you have my encouragement to do so as long as it’s what you want.

Anonymous: Hi! I’m an 18 yr old virgin submissive cunt who’s going to lose her virginity to her Master very soon .. But lately I’m not so sure anymore and I’m thinking about asking Him to fuck my ass first and keep going like that for a few months. Basically turning into a oral and anal only whore long before my cunt gets fucked for the first time. It makes me incredibly horny but it’s also kind of scary… what do you recommend, Sir?

I highly recommend it. You have nothing to lose by doing so, and it doesn’t need to be scary at all. Make sure to ease into anal and train your ass in advance so you’re ready for it and you’re confident in moving forward to anal sex.

Starting with anal is a great way to go, and I usually recommend staying anal only long term rather than jumping to vaginal. There’s a lot to be said about anal only girls with virgin pussies, and I think the world needs a lot more of them.

But you don’t need to make any sort of permanent commitment up front—try it for 3 to 6 months at first and then decide from there if you want to stay anal only and preserve your vaginal virginity long-term.

Good luck, and enjoy! I think you’re going to love being an anal and oral only girl. Please keep us updated with what you decide and how it goes. Feel free to ask any more specific questions you might have as well!