Category: Anal Only Lifestyle

If You’re Mostly Anal Only, It’s Time to Let Go of Vaginal

A common thing, possibly even more common than people already actively practicing anal only, is for someone to prefer anal sex to the point that it dominates a majority of their sexual activity. This isn’t at all surprising—when done properly, anal is consistently more pleasurable, enjoyable, exciting and intimate than vaginal sex, and among women who have regularly done both, most say they prefer anal.

But even still, many don’t take the final step to move past vaginal for good and decide to focus purely on anal going forward. Some simply haven’t considered the idea yet. Some feel they still need to have vaginal sex occasionally for some vague, undefined reason, or some sort of rejection of their femininity to not do it. Some think they still want or need it on occasion, or have a partner who does.

The reality is that anal only people and couples are consistently happier and more satisfied with their sex lives and find that excluding vaginal and focusing entirely on the anal pleasure that they prefer amplifies and improves everything and makes it more fun.

If you prefer anal, you owe it to yourself to try going anal only. You don’t have to commit to it fully up front, just try it for a few months at first and see what you think about it after that. Chances are you’ll find that you don’t miss vaginal at all and that you’ve enjoyed being anal only and want to stay that way.

Message: Luring a BDSM Newbie Into AO, Part 2

Anonymous: Thanks for the answer! Just to make it clear I didn’t mean “lure” as in “trick”, it was more like “convincing in a challenging an exciting way” and making her feel “part of something” (she already know about my other subs and is okay with that, it’s a whole new world for her and she’s the one who came to me proposing to give anything a try). My fault for not having English as a mother tongue!

Fair enough. So long as she’s consenting and open to and eager about the process and everything involved, then that’s great.

I think focusing primarily on anal is a great idea, and only doing vaginal on rare occasions if she is particularly desperate for it, and reducing the frequency of vaginal over time. Ultimately it all comes down to how she does with just anal and whether she really needs vaginal or does just fine with clit stimulation + anal, etc. If she doesn’t actually need vaginal penetration and enjoys frequent anal, there may not be much reason to continue with vaginal at all.

Everyone is different, so there isn’t any universal answer that works best for everyone. Find something that works for the two of you and work from there.

Don’t Be Afraid to Communicate With Your Partner

A common concern of those who prefer anal and would like to go anal only is how their partner will respond to the idea, and that fear generally leads to not expressing truthfully just how important the idea of going anal only really is to them. Resentment can build, frustration can form, and the relationship can be harmed due to lack of communication and mutual enjoyment.

While there may at times be reasons to gradually ease towards the topic conversationally, be open and honest about your needs and desires. Does vaginal not do much for you and the idea of anal only interest and excite you? Then you should start talking about that fact with your partner and share your needs and then discuss any concerns or issues that arise as a result.

Always try to keep from pointing fingers at each other or suggesting that you’re unsatisfied as a result of your partner, and keep it more positive and focused on what your needs are and the things that you love and enjoy and what you would like more of. If anal is something that you do sometimes but not all the time, emphasize how much you love doing anal with your partner and how sexy and incredible it is when you do so and that you’d like to focus more on that with them.

If they have concerns about the idea of giving up vaginal sex long-term, suggest trying it for a shorter period of time—one to three months—without a full commitment at that point, and then after that trial period is over, reconvene and discuss a longer length of time from there.

While not everyone is going to immediately go for the idea, being open and honest can go a long way and people generally are willing to try things for their partner and do what they need or want sexually if they’re honest about it.

Message: Anal Only Porn Directors?

Anonymous: Hey with all this talk on anal only porn stars, what about directors and other content creators? Are there any that are anal only leaning or at least professing some anal only liking, but just making pussy content for job security?

Giorgio Grandi comes to mind as one of the biggest anal-preferring porn producers who predominantly makes anal only porn. He does include vaginal penetration at times in some scenes, but has one of the biggest portfolios of pure anal only scenes out there, and tends to only add vaginal as a secondary act as part of double or triple penetration during an existing act of anal sex, which is always the primary act in his films.

Mike Adriano also focuses nearly exclusively on anal sex in his scenes and while there is the occasional vaginal penetration it’s quite uncommon and rarely lasts long. He’s a self-professed ass addict and clearly doesn’t have much interest in or preference for pussy.

Jay Sin similarly focuses almost entirely on anal.

Article: You Can’t Get Pregnant From Anal Sex, Except…

This article on Refinery29 goes into detail about how and why anal sex doesn’t result in pregnancy.

Anal sex is a kind of sex, but just like oral sex, it won’t result in pregnancy — no matter what genitals the people involved are working with. While you can transmit STIs during anal sex (and during oral sex, too), pregnancy won’t happen — except in one rare situation. […] Pregnancy doesn’t happen during anal sex because the anus isn’t connected to the vagina or any other reproductive organs. People without vaginas can’t get pregnant — while “m-preg” is a popular fanfiction category, it doesn’t work that way in real life: trans men can get pregnant, but cis men cannot.

It then proceeds to detail the one scenario where pregnancy can result from anal sex:

There is one way in which anal sex could result in pregnancy: if semen enters the vagina after ejaculation. According to Planned Parenthood, “Since your anus isn’t connected to your reproductive organs, anal sex can’t directly cause pregnancy. But it’s still possible for semen to get into the vagina during anal sex — if the guy ejaculates into or near the anus, and the semen leaks from there down onto the vulva. Fingers and hands could make this more likely, too, by moving semen towards the vulva.”

That means that if someone has anal sex and then ejaculates into the anus or somewhere else near the vagina, sperm could theoretically, accidentally, enter the vagina and cause a pregnancy. If someone ejaculates after anal sex, touches the semen, and then fingers their partner, that could theoretically result in a pregnancy, too. But if semen doesn’t enter the vagina, there’s no chance of pregnancy happening.

Fortunately, this is exceedingly rare, but it is possible. So if getting pregnant is not your intent, be sure to clean up afterwards and take care to avoid semen entering the vaginal canal after anal sex.

If getting pregnant is your intent, however, and you want to maintain a completely vaginal penetration-free lifestyle even while doing so, whether just because you want to avoid going back to vaginal intercourse or because you want to maintain vaginal virginity, you can utilize this method to engage in anal sex as normal, ejaculate anally, and then push it back out while spreading the vagina open for it to run down and into. This technique can work and has been used by those in the anal only lifestyle, though it may require repeated attempts to do so.

Continue reading on Refinery29

Message: Luring a BDSM Newbie Into AO

Anonymous: I am training this young BDSM newbie (she’s 19 and submissive) and she never done anal before, but is willing to give it to me. She’s already sending me a lot of buttspread nudes as I request, so she’s very open and obedient to it. She had two boyfriends before and they were the nerd-beta type and she hated that, wants “someone who can control me not the other way around”. So my goal is: I’m planning to turn her into an AO slave, but maybe not right at the beginning, not to shock her too much. I thought about reversing the typical scenario, fucking her only in the ass 3 or 4 times we meet, then giving her a mixed pussy/assfuck as a “reward” at the following encounter. For how long should I do this before saying AO is a requirement to keep seeing me? What are your thoughts and advices? Also I thought about still letting her be licked on her pussy by other sub girl(s) that I eventually bring into our relationship.

If your intent is to demand strict AO from her, you should be pretty open with her about the fact that you are only interested in anal from the beginning. While a gradual introduction is fine, unless you’re exploring together and seeing where things go together without a clear destination in mind, you should be up front with your intentions rather than trying to “lure” or “trick” her and then demanding anal only from her or you leave her.

Even if she’s submissive, she’s still a person and gets to make decisions too.

Message: Anal Only Beyond Cis-Women

slut_wannabe: How would you feel about expanding the AO movement to encompass those who are not cis-women?

I am a pansexual (technically) male who desires to be receptive anal only.

I believe that ALL people, whatever gender they are should primarily practice receptive anal sex, whether it is with penises, other body parts, or toys/tools. Oral sex is fine as well, but vaginal sex should best be limited to actual breeding attempts only.

This, I believe, would eliminate most sexual hangups, encourage a much broader exploration of sexuality and erotic pleasure, and be the basis of true sexual equality.

What do you think?

The anal only lifestyle is open and applicable to everyone who wishes to be a part of it, and many different people identify as anal only. Not everyone who does so is receptively anal only, but there certainly are people with all assortments of genitals who choose to forego them in favor of being anal only. There are plenty of others who are only interested in being anal only as the penetrator, however, and they serve just as important a role in the anal only lifestyle!

The Amplification of Arousal With Anal

One of the more subtle but powerful effects of anal sex in general and the anal only lifestyle is the amplifying effects that it can have on arousal. For someone with an already powerful sex drive, this can be quite the intense increase, while for someone who might struggle with arousal or has a partner with a higher libido than they do, it can be an incredible gamechanger and help.

Anal Can Be Very Exciting

While anal sex is becoming increasingly popular and common, it’s still generally less common than vaginal sex, and so anal play and sex can be quite exciting and that excitement often translates into increased arousal about having and during anal sex.

However, it’s not only limited to those who are just getting started with anal. Anal only couples very frequently report an increase of arousal or desire that continues many years into their anal only relationship, and while it’s quite common for sex to become stagnant and vaginal to become boring, anal is far more likely to remain exciting and arousing for everyone.

Anal Stimulation is Arousing

The anus has a high concentration of nerve endings that make it one of the most sensitive sexual centers in the human body, and the rectum is in close proximity to other pleasure centers in a way that anal penetration easily stimulates, so it’s no surprise that anal stimulation and penetration not only feels really good, it can have an intense effect on arousal as well. Women who engage in anal sex frequently talk about how horny it makes them, and as they gain more experience, especially when shifting away from vaginal sex or clitoral stimulation to focus exclusively on anal, develop an anal arousal they can feel in their ass, and a craving for more anal sex.

The Effects of Anal Orgasms on Arousal

It’s pretty commonly known that vaginal and clitoral orgasms often result in a loss of arousal afterwards, with women losing interest in sex and even feeling bad or regretful or depressed afterwards. This unfortunate effect can result in an overall decrease in libido for some, but generally just puts an end to the fun for a while and makes people not feel very good about themselves. It’s also led to a growing interest in orgasm denial and edging for many women, which can provide pleasure and arousal without the negative side effects.

With anal sex and the anal only lifestyle, however, come the possibility of anal orgasms, which can be intensely pleasurable—often more so than vaginal or clitoral orgasms—but also for most women do not result in a loss of arousal afterwards. Women still feel great, and sexual, and horny, and happy post-orgasm, and can continue for more if they want, or just stay in that happy arousal-filled state of mind, put a plug in, and continue with their day. It’s a great sex-positive way to be, that fills one’s entire life with a state of sexuality and pleasure rather than only some occasional period of time.

So if arousal or loss of arousal post-orgasm has been an issue for you, continue the anal only lifestyle and pursuing pure anal orgasms without clitoral stimulation, and you’ll likely have a much more positive and enjoyable experience!

Message: Anal Sex Made Me Feel More Like a Woman

Monica: I found this site after searching the internet to see if there were other women like me. After reading some of the stories I wanted to tell you mine.

I am a 28 year old woman and I have Vaginismus, a condition which always made vaginal sex incredibly painful for me. My husband and I were high school sweethearts. When we fooled around in high school, any penetration of my vagina was excruciating.

After we married, I could only have sex for a few minutes (on those rare occassions I could) before I had to stop. My husband was always kind and understanding, making due with blowjobs or handjobs. I always felt like a failure. Worse, I felt like less of a woman who was unworthy of this man’s love. Although my husband tried to please me by going down on me, I never even came close to orgasm. We would occassionally watch porn together until I would get so horny I would try, failing more often then succeeding, then give him a blowjob.

One video we watched had a couple having anal sex. I watched with excitement as the woman on the video was penetrated anally and wondered if this could be the solution we so desperately wanted. I told my husband I wanted to try anal sex and he apprehensivly agreed. We knew enough to know it wasn’t going to be like the movie we watched. Suffering with Vaginismus, we always needed a lot of lubricant to accomplish penetration. My husband applied so much lube it was all over the bed. I laid on my back, my legs on my husband’s shoulders. He then placed the head of his penis against my ass. I took a couple of deep breaths and signaled him to continue. As he applied more pressure I felt my ass relax as he began entering me. I’m not going to lie, there was a little pain, but nothing like the pain I experienced during vaginal sex. After several minutes I became aware my husband was no longer sliding into me. I looked at him, afraid he was not enjoying the experience, and told him it was okay to keep going. That’s when he said he was all the way in. Then it happened. The thought that my husband was fully inside me for the first time and I felt almost no pain caused me to experience my first orgasm. As I began to orgasm, my ass began to tighten and loosen around him. I could feel his penis pulse as my husband experienced his own orgasm. As our mutual orgasms began to subside, he began to remove his penis. I told him not to. I actually told him I never wanted him to remove it. My husband, ever the joker, said he thought it might make social events a little awkward. To which we both had to laugh. He leaned over and we began to kiss. Within minutes I could feel his penis begin to harden, still inside me. Then he began slow, gentle thrusts as we gazed into each others faces, eyes locked on each other. I had never felt so loved or connected to this man as I did now. Within minutes we were both experiencing another orgasm. I never felt more like a woman than I did in this moment, fully pleasing my husband, and being fully pleased by him.

For the next couple of months we made up for lost time. We had sex every chance we had. We had sex all over the house. We tried every position we could get our bodies into. The more anal sex we had the better it got.

That was nine years ago. We never attempted vaginal sex again. While so many of the couples we know have stagnant sex lives, we usually have sex five times a week. My husband and I feel incredibly connected. In a way, we credit my Vaginismus for our incredible sex life and incredible marriage.

Although many women with Vaginismus may find anal sex just as painful, I believe there are many who could benefit as I did by having an open mind and trying anal sex.

Thanks for sharing your story. I’m sorry that vaginal sex caused such a struggle in your sex life and your relationship with your husband in the past, but I’m so glad to hear that you were able to discover anal sex and enjoy the anal only lifestyle going forward from there.

Anal can be a gamechanger for many women with vaginismus and similar conditions. While, as you note, sometimes it can affect anal as well, more often than not anal is significantly easier to enjoy than vaginal, as you discovered. I’ve talked with numerous women over the years with similar stories, who had struggled with sex and intimacy due to vaginal discomfort or pain, and who found that going anal only and excluding vaginal penetration entirely provided the pleasure, sexual expression, and intimacy they’d been missing.

While there are absolute benefits to going anal only for almost everyone, it’s very obviously advantageous in circumstances like yours where vaginal sex is actively painful and essentially impossible to do with any sort of enjoyment. Hopefully, with the growing shift towards anal positivity and openness, doctors begin recommending anal as the alternative rather than women continuing to suffer through painful vaginal sex, or undergoing surgery for something unnecessary when anal is a better option anyway.

Message: Vagina as Lube Dispenser

Anonymous: Thank you for publishing this amazing blog with great content and helpful sex advice!

There is however one function of the vagina that you may have overlooked, namely to act as a lube dispenser for the anus. My girlfriend gets very wet when we make out, and is very easy to have anal sex with – she’s often clean down there and relaxed. So I just dip my penis in the pussy – for no longer than necessary – just to make it wet and lubed up, and then move to the ass. With this technique, we can enjoy very spontaneous anal sex without much preparation.

The vagina as a source of lube is commonly used by those who practice the anal only lifestyle, though typically not through penis-in-vagina penetration, as many choose to avoid that entirely. The same effect can be achieved through non-penetrative contact. If this works well for you, however, and is what you prefer, go for it.