Krista: From reading your blog I decided to try and have anal orgasms by not using my clit and to my surprise they started to come easily for me once I stopped. It only took me a few times before they started, and they are already my favorite. I have lost interest in my clit because of them and wanted to say thank you!

You’re welcome, thanks for sharing. Everyone has different experiences, but in general, clit denial as a means of achieving anal orgasms is a great option, because clit stimulation tends to be an easier form of reaching orgasm at first, and so it can overpower the more subtle sensations and stimulations needed through anal to achieve pure anal orgasms. I encourage it for everyone to at least try!

CharlesO: Hey man, I want to thank you for all the information on this page, it really helped my girlfriend and me start doing anal regularly and now she’s agreed to try going anal only too starting this month, which is a real dream come true for me. I hope she loves it and we can stay anal only, fingers crossed! We’re going to try it until the end of the year for now.

The thing that really made it click for her was when I started rimming her every time we did anything sexual, and especially before any anal play. She loves how it feels and it drives her wild, makes her pussy drip, and she says she can feel it relax her, not just her asshole but her whole body. By the time I’m done she usually begs me to fuck her in the ass and it goes in really easily and doesn’t hurt her at all. And that was a big difference from before when she was agreeing to do it but it took more preparation and she would hurt and get sore and want to wait weeks between sometimes. Now we do it every day and she’s asking me for it instead of the other way around!

Glad that they were helpful for the two of you! I’ve been a strong proponent for education before anal in order to maximize enjoyment for everyone and ensure a lasting love of anal.

Thanks for sharing your experiences with rimming—that’s been my experience as well, and I highly recommend it for everyone looking to start having anal sex with their partner. Focus on her enjoyment through rimming and external play first and make her want more, and she’ll be much more eager to have anal sex.

Good luck with your anal only trial! It sounds like she’s going to love it and with any luck will want to stay fully anal only after the end of the year!

JennyAO: I read your article that encouraged AO girls to tell their friends about anal only, and encourage them to do it too, and I want to share how it worked for me. I have been doing it for a few years now, and I think this is a great idea, and that you are urging other AO women to do it!

My friends and I have always been really open about sexual topics, which made it easier, and they knew I loved anal. A few months after my boyfriend and I went anal only, I started telling them about that, too. Most of them thought I was crazy at first, even the ones who also liked anal. But we kept talking and when they saw how much I really liked it, their skepticism changed into curiosity and I encouraged them to try it too. We had started with one of your one month challenges and I told them to do the same.

I’m really proud to say that now a few years later, four of my six closest friends are also anal only, and one of them is mainly AO, but if her boyfriend wants it, sometimes she’ll still do vaginal (I’m still working on them). The sixth has not been convinced, but she does like anal. I think that if I can help her orgasm from anal, she might be convinced. She is the only one of us who has vaginal orgasms, so I think she doesn’t see the benefits as much as those of us who can only cum from anal.

Another advantage is that not only are we closer as friends (some of us now often have sex with each other and our partners), we can really help and encourage each other, it’s great to have a special support network for anal only. It has helped two of us stay anal only through a new relationship, and I think if we stay this close together, we will always stay anal only with each other’s encouragement.

So, I want to say the same as you did: tell your friends that you are anal only, and encourage them to do it too! For me, doing this changed my life in a very good way.

Thanks for sharing your wonderful experiences. I keep hearing similar stories from women who have had such success with open-minded friends and encouraging them to try also going anal only if they haven’t already. More often than not it ends in at least some of the friends being anal only too, and over time can continue to grow from there as a little local club of anal only girls.

This is a great way to keep spreading the anal only lifestyle to more people, because it’s local, and is based on hearing from and talking with people they know and trust and so they may be more inclined to actually try it for themselves.

Many men reach out asking how they can get their female partners to start having anal sex or go anal only. While there is a lot of great advice about the process in our Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle, one key to being successful in this goal is approaching it with a positive rather than negative attitude.

If you’re unsatisfied with vaginal sex and think anal sex will be the solution to that, don’t start out the conversation by saying that you’re unhappy with vaginal sex. Nobody wants to hear that their partner isn’t enjoying sex with them, even if it isn’t their fault and there’s nothing wrong with them. It can make people insecure about their bodies and their performance and be less inclined to try new things.

Instead, work on gradually making her feel sexy and proud about her ass and let her know how beautiful and attractive it is, how much you love it, how it turns you on, and as you start having anal sex together, let her know how much you enjoy sharing that with her and how great it feels. Build her up rather than putting her down by making her feel like her pussy isn’t good enough.

Couple that with making sure that anal feels really great for her and she gets a lot of pleasure and orgasms out of it, and you’ll be a long way towards enjoying anal together frequently!

Hey! I’m new here. Me and my boyfriend have made the transition to anal only 9 days ago and we are loving it! The pleasure is so intense all the time.

Unfortunately, I am usually unable to cum from our sessions. Of the 13 times we’ve had anal sex since then I’ve only reached orgasm 3 times. Don’t get me wrong it’s still super pleasurable but I can’t climax.

I was looking for some place to ask and found this forum. So I hope you can help me and my boyfriend.

Is there any way to train myself to cum from anal every time? I’m open with going non anal only for the training as long as I end up being anal only. Thanks!

SluttyJanet, Anal Only Lifestyle

One of several good responses:

Hi, well first of all patience.

you can “train” that is to say play with your ass, with toys and others but it is not necessary if you have regular sex with your boyfriend using your ass.

If you touch your clitoris during anal sex you will reach cum relatively quickly but I imagine you want an anal orgasm, without pussy / clit, this is very intense but you must have patience, your body must adapt to anal first.
What they advised me was to use the missionary but anal poses, or lying down with my butt slightly raised with a pillow or ride and play with your waist, it works even though I like other positions too but it can be useful to start. xD

it takes a month and a half (approximately) going anal only, to have orgasms, I think it is on the mental side, focusing all your pleasure and sensations on your butt and that takes some time, but it is something more personal, each girl will have her time I imagine, but what I am trying to say is that it is not so simple.

I will give you a tip that can be useful to you, forget this, I mean, at the beginning I was like you, with that orgasm in my mind but I had to really forget it and just enjoy, let go and that climax would come. Probably there will come a moment of sex, where you will feel that you can no longer, but continue and break that barrier, then when you think that you can no longer, and that climax will come.

julietagc, Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Continue reading this and other answers to this question on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Me and my Partner are anal only by choice and convenience but we have something in common. we don’t really like to use lube as it gets rid of a lot of friction and feeling inside for us. some days when shes just naturally wide open we can get in no lube other times we need a bit and it does steal some feeling for us and make it messier sometimes but does anybody else do or like this or is it uncommon

BWS19, Anal Only Lifestyle forum

It may surprise readers that most people responding similarly prefer to not use lube beyond a bit of saliva and natural anal mucous for lubrication!

Continue reading this discussion on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

I see this question come up a lot, as people discover that they really enjoy anal but then worry that they can’t have it as often as they would like to. This is one of those things that keeps a lot of people from going anal only, because they feel the need to take time off between having anal sex and do vaginal in between to make up for it.

The reality is that there’s not really any such thing as too much anal sex, and it all depends on you and your body and how much you can handle at a given time.

If you’re getting sore after anal sex every time you do it and need to rest between having sex again, you’re on the edge of what’s right for you at that time. You should find a balance and frequency that just slightly pushes your limits and stick with that for a few weeks to a month, and then gradually start increasing the frequency. If you can do it twice a week at first, try going to three times a week after a while, and so on from there.

If you aren’t getting sore or noticing any problems, then you aren’t doing it too much and it’s perfectly fine for you, and could probably do it more often if you wanted to!

Ultimately, the more frequently you have anal sex, the easier it is to have anal sex frequently, because it helps keep your anal muscles in good shape and ready to have sex. Think of it like exercising, if you work out infrequently, you get sore and are in pain and struggle every time you do it, but if you establish an exercise routine and stick to it regularly, it gets much easier and more enjoyable. The same is true for anal sex.

Anonymous: Why do so many women say that anal is amazing, then they go back to vaginal sex? You’re wasting time on vaginal sex. After your first anal orgasm, you should go anal only! A real anal slut abandons vaginal sex and goes anal only.

There are a variety of reasons: some people aren’t ready to give up vaginal yet, or think they need to continue it to be normal or to be a “proper” woman, have a partner who wants it even if they don’t, don’t feel that they’re ready for full time anal sex yet, or have fears about some of the myths surrounding “too much” anal sex.

But yes, it’s a waste of time to continue focusing on vaginal sex when you could be unlocking the true pleasures of pure anal only and anal orgasms. I highly encourage making the transition from doing both vaginal and anal, or even from being “mostly anal only” to full time, 100% anal only.

Anonymous: Hi, I was wondering if you could tell me the name of the panties I sometimes see girls wearing in porn where it covers their pussy but is open in the back for anal sex?

I really want some! I like keeping my pussy covered and I use tape but panties like this would be nice too for when I can’t tape my pussy. I love the idea of chastity but I’m too scared to get piercings or anything, so tape and other easy things would be great!

You can usually find those panties by searching for “backless panties” or “open back panties” or “cage back panties”. They’re an excellent option for any anal only woman and send a good signal to partners! I’ve even heard of a few anal only women who don’t wear any other kind of panties anymore.

I’ve long recommended the use of butt plugs to aid in the anal training process, and they really are one of the best ways to practice, train and warm up before sex.

Many people, however, are uncomfortable with the idea of wearing them all day at work or in public, or have a job or lifestyle that makes it difficult to do so. Fortunately, there’s a great option anyone can enjoy to make long term plug wear possible and to enjoy the benefits!

Putting in a plug before you go to bed and wearing it overnight can give you many hours of passive anal training each day without interfering with your daily life and routine.

Overnight plug wear passively trains your ass

When you’re wearing a plug during the day, it can be very stimulating and for a lot of people that’s part of the appeal, but it can also be distracting and interfere with other parts of daily life for some people.

By wearing a plug overnight instead, it’s more of a passively pleasant feeling. It can be distracting for some people at first, but with a little practice, it provides an easy 6 to 8 hours per day of anal training where you don’t need to do anything but slip your plug in and go to sleep. Keep up that routine, and you’ll be having anal sex regularly and easily!

Better relaxation and sleep can result from overnight plug wear

Once you get past the newness of having your ass plugged while you sleep, it’s common to wake up feeling more refreshed and relaxed than before and getting better sleep. This may seem counterintuitive to those who are just starting and feel overstimulated with the plug in and may even find it hard to get to sleep the first time or two, but once you get comfortable with it in, it becomes very relaxing!

This pairs nicely with the natural relaxation of the body that most people experience when sleeping, and as their anal muscles relax along with that, it helps the plug hold them open comfortably and train them into becoming more elastic and easy to stretch open for sex and more active forms of masturbation.

Overnight plug wear is one of the easiest ways to establish an anal routine

One of the most important things for enjoying anal long term or becoming anal only is establishing a consistent routine so that your ass stays warmed up and ready for sex rather than waiting long amounts of time between sex or masturbation each time and needing to start over to open yourself back up and getting sore every time.

As you get a little more experienced with wearing a plug to bed, start doing it every night, and you’ll have your very own routine to stay warmed up and limber and ready for sex or masturbation as often as you want.

Ease into overnight plug wear

If you’re new to long term butt plug wear, you may not immediately be able to wear a plug all night long the first time you try it. Put it in, go to sleep, and see how it goes. If it gets uncomfortable sometime in the night, take it out and see if it needs more lube added. If it stays uncomfortable, leave it out the rest of the night and try again the next night. After a few nights of this, you should notice that you can wear it for longer amounts of time.

Similarly, you may find that certain types of plugs are more comfortable than others for overnight wear. High quality silicone, metal and glass tend to be the best. Cheaper silicone and other soft materials that need water-based lube can often dry out overnight and need more lube. But try it for yourself and see how it goes!