Anonymous: Hi, I’ve been transitioning into the anal only lifestyle for a few months now. I’ve stopped having vaginal sex and only penetrate my ass for sex or masturbation, which has been an amazing change. I feel more connected to my body and much more focused when I orgasm.

But I still find myself drawn to clit stimulation when I masturbate, even though I know it doesn’t really fit with the anal only mindset. I don’t want to depend on it anymore, and I want to fully commit to anal orgasms only. How do I break the habit of going back to the clit, and retrain my body to respond only through my ass?

Thanks for everything you do — this blog has helped me more than I can say.

If you haven’t already, I recommend checking out our Benefits to Avoiding Clit Stimulation During Anal Sex page in our Guide, it details a lot of what you’ve already mentioned but also goes into detail about how to stop using your clit.

It makes total sense that you want to move past clitoral dependence and focus on pure anal stimulation and pleasure instead, and I commend you for wanting to take that step. It will only deepen your enjoyment and your commitment to the anal only lifestyle.

It sounds like this is mostly an issue for you when you masturbate, not when you have sex. If you’re able to focus on the anal pleasure during sex, I encourage working on shifting your thoughts to your ass when masturbating as well. If you’re just casually playing with yourself and fingering your ass and feel tempted to rub, take the opportunity to focus more on your ass and switch to something more active like a dildo. The increased penetration and sensation will help you away from your clit. Whenever you feel the urge to touch your pussy, increase your anal intensity instead. Use that urge to redirect attention to your ass.

If you still find it hard to ignore, try covering it with tape when masturbating, or using a topical anesthetic like orajel to temporarily numb your clit. A physical barrier or numbing can work very well to train you away from it because even if you’re tempted to touch, it won’t deliver any sensation — and your attention will return to where it belongs. Over time, your body will adapt. The clit will fade from your awareness, and your ass will take over fully.

Anonymous: My girlfriend is incredibly skilled and passionate about anal fisting and double anal — I’m so proud of her and love bragging about her talents to trusted circles. I fantasize about her showing off those skills in some good, hard gangbangs or intense group sessions, really owning her sexuality.

She was raised Christian and, while she’s not deeply religious anymore, the idea of actually engaging in group sex still feels like a heavy conflict for her. This creates tension between my desire to see her fully express herself and her lingering reservations.

Am I okay wanting her to move on to real-life double anal experiences with others, even if it challenges her comfort zone?

It’s completely okay for you to want that. Fantasizing about your partner being fully used, admired, and celebrated for her abilities—especially when she’s as talented and passionate about anal fisting and DAP as you describe—is a natural extension of your pride, arousal, and deep admiration for her. There’s nothing wrong with craving that next level of intensity, or even feeling like it would unlock something deeper in both of you. That’s part of the anal only mindset: wanting to go further, stretch wider, and be even more fully shared.

At the same time, her background and concerns matter too. Even if she no longer holds strict religious beliefs, years of internalized messages don’t just disappear. Group sex, especially in the context of showcasing her body and talents, can feel like a direct challenge to everything she was taught to suppress or avoid. That doesn’t mean she’ll never move in that direction, but it does mean she may need time, space, and the right framing to get there.

Instead of pushing her toward a decision, consider framing it as a shared evolution. Not “I want you to do this,” but “I love how you’ve embraced anal and DAP, and I can’t stop imagining how powerful it would be to see you fully celebrated in that way. Not because I need it to happen, but because it excites me to think of you being admired and filled and stretched for others the way I already admire and desire you.” Let her feel how much this comes from love and erotic awe, not pressure.

So yes, wanting it is okay. Even if it never happens exactly the way you imagine, the fact that you’re proud of her, aroused by her skills, and eager to see her reach her full potential in this lifestyle is beautiful. I hope that you’re able to enjoy DAP together with other partners, and maybe even go double anal only if you aren’t already!

For far too long, men have been expected to take whatever sex they can get — and that usually means pussy. It’s what culture tells you to expect, what partners are assumed to offer, and what most of society still treats as the “real” kind of sex. But for most men, vaginal sex is not just underwhelming. It’s a waste.

Every time you have vaginal sex, you’re giving up the chance to fuck her ass instead. You’re trading pleasure for thoughtless simplicity. Depth and tight friction for natural lubrication. Real passion for the soft expectation that you’ll accept what’s easiest. And why?

You don’t need it. You shouldn’t settle for it. And if you’re serious about who you are sexually, you need to stop.

It’s Not About Denial — It’s About Standards

This isn’t about withholding sex. This is about choosing the kind of sex that reflects your values. Anal sex is more intense, more dominant, more connected, and more psychologically satisfying. It’s not routine — it’s deliberate. And that’s exactly why it works.

When a man chooses anal only, he’s not limiting himself. He’s demanding more. More control. More pleasure. More passion. He’s making it clear that he knows what he wants — and won’t accept less.

Vaginal sex might be what she offers first. But you deserve to refuse it and insist on anal only — or nothing at all.

Assert It, Don’t Negotiate It

You don’t have to settle for vaginal. State that you’re anal only — not because you’re being picky, but because you know what works for you. You know what satisfies you. And you know that it’s not the pussy.

If she doesn’t get it, or tries to change your mind, that’s fine — she’s not the one. You don’t need to compromise your body or your desires for someone who isn’t willing to meet you there. There are plenty of women who already prefer anal, and even more who will come to love it when it’s the only option.

But they’ll never make that shift if men keep giving in and going along with vaginal just because it’s available. If you want a world of anal only women, it starts with anal only men.

Stop Reinforcing Vaginal Expectation

Every time you fuck a woman in the pussy, you teach her that it’s acceptable — that it’s good enough. You normalize it. You reinforce a culture that says, “Give him your vagina and he’ll be satisfied.”

But you’re not satisfied. And you shouldn’t pretend to be.

When you say no to pussy, you open the door for something better. You set the bar higher. You make space for anal to be not just accepted, but expected. And when more women encounter men who say no to pussy and yes only to ass, they’ll learn to offer you what you’re actually there for — or step aside.

Being an anal only man isn’t about being extreme or forcing women to do something they don’t want to do. It’s about being honest. You want intensity, connection, and control — and you know where that lives. In the ass. Not the pussy.

Refuse pussy. Demand ass. Stay anal only.

ZB: I’m in a marriage that’s vaginal only and I crave anal. I’m incredibly aroused by reading all these posts. I don’t want to destroy my marriage, but I need to pursue my desires. Could I get some recommendations for online communities?

Thanks for sharing this, it’s a powerful and vulnerable place to be, and you’re not alone. Many people in long-term, traditional relationships find themselves discovering a deep craving for anal—especially anal only—later on. It can feel like a secret obsession, especially when your partner doesn’t share or understand that desire.

Craving anal doesn’t mean you’re betraying your partner. It means you’re uncovering an important part of your sexual identity that has long been overlooked or suppressed. The intensity of your arousal when reading posts or imagining anal scenarios is a sign that this isn’t just a passing kink. It’s something deeper. Something central. Whether you ultimately transition your marriage toward anal, you deserve space to understand what this means for you first.

As far as communities, check out our forums, Discord, and the Anal Only Lifestyle subreddit.

Tim: Hey, love the blog. I’ve been anal only for about a year now — I don’t masturbate any other way, I only play with my ass, and I’ve completely lost interest in using my cock for anything other than sex with my girlfriend. The problem is, she’s not anal only. She loves to play with my ass, and she enjoys getting anal herself and does it with me when I ask, but she still mostly wants vaginal sex and doesn’t seem interested in giving it up.

I don’t want to pressure her, but I also can’t stop thinking about how much better things would be if we were both anal only. The sex, the mindset, the clarity — it all feels lopsided right now. I love her, but I would love us both to be totally anal only and stop using her pussy.

Is it selfish to want her to go anal only too? Should I just accept this difference, or is it okay to expect more?

It’s not selfish to want your partner to share your values — especially when those values are shaping your identity, your arousal, and your sexuality. Anal only isn’t just a preference, it’s a lifestyle. A discipline. A mindset. A commitment. So it makes perfect sense that you’d want your girlfriend to embrace that with you.

Unfortunately, for many women vaginal is still the default — not because it’s better, but because it’s familiar, expected, and what society says is normal. Even though she embraces anal only for you, she may not fully understand what anal only could mean for herself yet.

The best thing you can do is stay grounded in your choice and be honest with her. Let her know this isn’t about control — it’s about alignment. That you’ve found something that brings you pleasure and satisfaction, and that you want to share that with her fully, not just occasionally. Frame it as a higher standard for the relationship, not a rejection of her.

If she’s interested, encourage her to try a week or month of anal only together and see what it’s really like to move past her pussy and focus just on anal pleasure for the both of you. If you make it through a month, chances are she’ll want to stay anal only going forward!

Pornography has evolved in many ways — with higher production quality, more diverse performers, and wider acceptance of niche content. Yet, one area where the industry remains stuck is its ongoing inclusion of vaginal sex. Despite growing demand for anal only content and clear viewer trends that favor anal scenes, the vast majority of mainstream porn continues to include the vagina.

It’s time for porn studios to move forward and end production of vaginal and traditional double penetration (DP) scenes. The future of porn — and of sexual culture — is anal only.

Viewer Demand Is Clear

According to Pornhub’s 2017 Insights Report, “anal” was the second most searched term among women, and among the most consistently popular search categories across all demographics. That trend has only grown. Each year, terms like “anal,” “double anal,” and “anal only” dominate site-wide rankings. Users aren’t just curious — they’re searching, watching, and returning.

This demand doesn’t just come from men seeking visual novelty. Women are actively looking for anal scenes that mirror their own preferences or desires — scenes that reflect real interest and commitment to anal sex. But these viewers are often forced to sift through endless vaginal scenes, or endure anal scenes that are mixed with unwanted vaginal penetration or traditional DP.

If the demand is so clear, why hasn’t the supply caught up?

The Cultural Shift Is Already Here

Anal sex is no longer taboo. In fact, it’s fast becoming the standard in many people’s sex lives — especially among younger generations. Surveys consistently show that more couples are incorporating anal into their routines, more women are reporting anal orgasms, and more people are prioritizing anal pleasure as a key part of their identity.

And yet, porn still treats anal as the “extra.” Vaginal scenes dominate every studio’s catalog, and even anal-labeled scenes often include vaginal penetration or require the performer to switch holes. That’s not representation — it’s compromise.

Studios are holding onto outdated assumptions about what sex “should” look like, rather than listening to what viewers are actually searching for and what performers increasingly want to do.

The Future of Porn Is Anal Only

Porn studios have a chance to lead — to step beyond the stale assumptions of the past and into the reality of what viewers and performers are already living. Ending vaginal production is not about exclusion. It’s about clarity. About creating content that is intentional, elevated, and built around a deeper understanding of the future of sex.

By going anal only, studios align with the strongest viewer trends in the industry, performers are empowered to do what they love, audiences get content that reflects their preferences without compromise, and porn can evolve into something more connected, more disciplined, and more real.

Stop producing vaginal scenes. Stop forcing DP when DAP is what people want. The time for half-measures is over. Make porn anal only — for viewers, for performers, and for the future.

VickyAO: Hi, this might be a strange one, but I’ve been anal only for over many years now. I stopped using my vagina for anything, no penetration, no touching, not even during masturbation. I’ve noticed something interesting: I literally don’t feel anything anymore when I try to think about vaginal stimulation. Like, it’s just… nothing. No arousal, no mental association, no sensation. It feels like that part of me shut down.

I don’t miss it. I love how focused I am on my ass now. I can have intense, long-lasting anal orgasms without any clitoral or vaginal stimulation at all. It’s better than anything I ever had before.

But can a woman actually lose the ability to get arousal and orgasm from her vagina if she’s anal only long enough? Like, can the body unlearn that kind of arousal permanently? And if so, is that a bad thing? Or is it just the natural outcome of going fully anal only and never going back?

Thanks, just curious how far this can go.

Obviously this varies from woman to woman, but it’s absolutely something a lot of anal only women start to notice after a while. Vaginal arousal just starts to go away, and the vagina starts to become dry and inactive, no longer responding to being turned on or getting stimulated anally. You feel desire in your asshole instead, and it starts to relax and open up or even in some cases start to lubricate itself when you’re turned on.

It’s not a bad thing, it’s a natural progression and your body’s embrace of being anal only. You don’t need your vagina anymore, and it’s deactivating. Enjoy it!

Kayla: Hi, I’m 19 and just got into my first real relationship with a guy who really wants to have sex. I’ve never been on birth control, and my sisters have had bad luck with hormonal interactions, but I don’t want to get pregnant. My boyfriend suggested we have anal sex instead, and I found this blog about only having anal sex. Can I just go anal only as a way to not get pregnant? Is that actually safe? Is there anything else I need to know?

Yes, going anal only is absolutely a valid and effective way to avoid pregnancy. There’s no risk of pregnancy from anal sex itself, as long as semen doesn’t come into contact with your vagina — including indirectly from hands, toys, or accidental slipping. Many women choose anal only as their exclusive form of sex for exactly this reason, especially when they want to avoid hormonal birth control. It’s an ideal natural form of birth control!

It’s important to be clear with your partner about boundaries, and to use condoms or get tested to avoid risk of STIs, especially in a new relationship. If you stay anal only and keep your limits firm, it can be a safe and empowering way to have sex without risking pregnancy. You’re not alone in this choice — a lot of women find that it’s not just a workaround, but going anal only is something that they genuinely prefer.

In my teens and early twenties, I strictly denied any and all access to my ass. Today, I’m in my early thirties and live an anal only lifestyle. Rather than dwelling on the time I wasted in my youth, I’d like to offer up some advice I learned along the way. Perhaps it will help some young readers begin their anal only journey before I did. Better late than never though, in my case!

1. Anal Only Does Not Happen Overnight

This isn’t a flip-the-switch transition. Your body needs time to adjust, and so does your mindset. Anal only isn’t just avoiding vaginal sex — it’s creating a new default. You’ll need time to stretch, to relax, and to retrain your response to arousal. At first, it may feel like you’re trying something new. Eventually, it feels like you’ve come home.

Don’t rush. Don’t force yourself. You don’t need to take large toys, or jump to double anal right away. The most important thing is consistency — giving your ass regular attention, and always using it as your only outlet for penetration. Your body will adapt if you give it a reason to.

2. Set Clear Boundaries with Yourself First

Before you talk to a partner, you need to make the decision for yourself. That means closing the door to vaginal sex completely, even when you’re alone. No fingers, no toys, no what-if fantasies. If you’re serious about going anal only, you need to build that boundary into your own habits and desires first.

That clarity makes it much easier to communicate with others, because you’re not negotiating — you’re sharing a truth you’ve already accepted.

3. Don’t Wait for a Partner to Make It Happen

Too many women wait for the “right guy” before they commit to anal only. But the best time to start is before you’re with someone — or even if you’re single. When you go anal only on your own terms, you stop shaping yourself around what others expect, and start building a foundation that someone else can join you on.

You’ll feel more confident, more in control, and more attracted to partners who actually match what you want.

4. Use Tools and Training with a Purpose

Butt plugs, dilators, toys — they’re all helpful, but only if you use them intentionally. Start small and go slow, but stay regular. Daily or near-daily plug wear (even just 30 minutes at first) can do wonders for building flexibility and comfort.

Choose toys based on what your body can handle comfortably with a little stretch — not what looks impressive. And always listen to your body. Discomfort is a sign to pause, not push.

5. Emotional Shifts Take Time Too

I didn’t expect the emotional rewiring that came with this shift. It’s not just about sensation — it’s about changing how you relate to your body, your boundaries, and your idea of sex itself. Letting go of vaginal sex was surprisingly freeing, and it brought me a kind of calm I never expected. Sex is no longer tied to fear of pregnancy or unwanted expectation. It’s something I fully choose. Don’t be surprised if this shift brings up feelings you didn’t anticipate. That’s part of what makes it real.

2InA: My girlfriend and I haven’t ever had vaginal sex, we started with anal when we got together and just went with it. We got into anal porn together early on, especially double anal. She started talking during sex about how good it would feel to be stretched by two cocks. She’d say things like “I wish there was another cock my ass right now too”. We started experimenting with toys: me pushing a dildo into her ass while fucking her, moving both together or alternating. The more we did it, the more it became part of our regular sex life.

About six months ago, we invited our roommate to join us for double anal. He’s someone we’re good friends with, trust, and who also loves anal and DAP from our conversations and when he’s seen us watching porn on occasion. It was supposed to be a one-time experience at first, but it felt so good. Since then, he’s been joining us for double anal a couple times a week. My girlfriend has taken to it in a way I didn’t expect, while it feels great for me, she goes wild with it and cums harder than she ever has before. Both our cocks in her ass gives her something that single anal just doesn’t.

Today she told me she wants to go double anal only. No more single anal, no more just me inside her. She says it’s not about me — that she still loves me, still craves me — but that her body and mind feel more complete, more satisfied, more truly taken when she’s being fully stretched by both of us. She wants the three of us to be in a relationship together and to only do DAP.

I’m not insecure about sharing her. We’ve already done that. But I do feel kind of weird about the idea of never again having her ass to myself. No moments where it’s just me inside her, just the two of us, just that simple connection. Do you have any suggestions? I know you’re going to push us to go double anal only since that’s a big part of your blog, but how can I wrap my head around it better?

You’re right — I am going to encourage you to go double anal only. Not because it’s a rule, or because it’s what I prefer. It’s clearly where your relationship is already heading, and your girlfriend isn’t just craving DAP as a novelty. She’s thriving on it. Her body, her orgasms, and her words are all telling you exactly what she needs. You’re not losing something. You’re seeing the next evolution of what you already started together.

It’s normal to feel something about the idea of never having her ass only to yourself again. That’s not weakness, it’s just adjustment. But think about where you’re actually at: you built your relationship and sex life on anal only. Double anal isn’t a threat to your connection — it’s a deepening of it. You’re not being replaced. You’re part of what makes her feel even more complete.

Try reframing it like this: when you were the only cock in her ass, you gave her everything she could handle at the time. Now that she’s ready for more, she’s inviting you to be part of that with her. Don’t step back, step in. The relationship doesn’t shrink when another cock joins yours in her ass, it expands. The trust gets stronger. The bond gets tighter.

If you still want moments of one-on-one time, you can do so through oral sex, or perhaps still having some cock + dildo sessions or even working her up to taking your cock and fist at the same time if your roommate isn’t available to join in.

This isn’t about replacing connection — it’s about completing it. Together in her ass, always. Always full. Always shared. That’s what anal only becomes at its peak — and you’re already there.