A self-described sex specialist posted the following on her blog, claiming to be correcting misconceptions men have about anal from viewing porn—unfortunately, her corrections are full of misconceptions:

boys like anal because of what they see in porn…
the assumption that its going to feel better because its tighter..
this is exactly how porn is misleading.. men who know how to satisfy a woman and have experienced making a woman orgasm usually do not even like anal. not only can a woman not orgasm from it, there is also no natural lubriation, or pulsing contractions (like there are in the vagina). Anal is also less intimate and is missing the gratification from arousing a woman (comparatively speaking)

While not all women can orgasm from anal penetration alone, many can, because the clitoris and g-spot can be stimulated anally—in many cases, better than it can vaginally. Furthermore, if you externally stimulate the clitoris while being anally penetrated, the anal penetration often amplifies the sensations from your clit. So while some will require more than just anal penetration, the anal penetration does often make it more pleasurable.

Natural lubrication is wildly overrated. All you need is a bottle of lube and a few seconds to a minute to apply it. A total non-issue. Plenty of women need lube for vaginal sex as well.

No pulsing contractions? Clearly not someone with a lot of experience with anal sex, because any such contractions felt vaginally are even more powerful anally. Anal muscles are incredible, and the pulsing contractions when she orgasms while you’re inside her ass are just about the best thing ever.

Anal is more intimate than vaginal sex, if you do it right. There are plenty of anal only couples who make love anally and find it to be far more intimate than vaginal sex. Anal is something special, far more special than vaginal.

When ever I am with my girlfriend and we are having sex I go straight for the bum, its seems I have no interest for the vagina just the bum, does these mean I am gay? I mean im not attracted to men but im am literally an anal sex addict! I really need your help guys so please help.

Fortunately, everyone in this comment thread is pretty reasonable and reassures him that this is totally normal and not gay.

A woman asks why her husband only wants anal sex and loses his erection when having vaginal sex with her:

Even when I beg, he would have anal sex first, get hard, and have doggy style for few seconds before he goes limp again.
Is it me? I don’t get it. Advise, please! I am so horny!

Reaction is mixed, with some making the idiotic and stereotypical “he’s gay” comments, but some good responses as well, indicating that some men simply prefer anal sex and that plenty of women do as well.

He’s not gay. Gay men are attracted to men, not anuses.

What’s with all of these “gay” comments? Ridiculous. Does it make a guy gay that he likes getting BJs from his gf/wife? Of course not. So why should engaging in anal sex be any different? I’m a woman and I vastly prefer anal sex, but my husband has a hangup against it. Such a shame. There is no explaining why I like it better. It just stirs something primal in me that vaginal sex doesn’t.

It all goes downhill from there, alas, with everyone else piling on and saying he’s guaranteed to be gay, because in their limited view of the world, the only reason a man would prefer fucking a woman’s ass instead of her pussy is because he secretly wants to be with men.

Source

Anonymous: I recently just had anal sex for the first time and afterwards my butthole felt a little gaping. I took a look and a little piece of skin was popping out that wasn’t there before. Could this possibly be prolapse or a hemorrhoid or is will my hole retract back to its normal size?

It’s normal to feel looser or like you’re gaping for a while after having anal, especially when it’s new. This feeling can sometimes last a few days, though usually goes away within a few hours. The area can also be a bit engorged from arousal or swollen from use—especially when starting out.

If you’re prone to hemorrhoids, anal can make them flare up sometimes. Despite the common myths, anal is not believed to cause prolapse—and even if it did, it certainly wouldn’t happen the first time you had anal!

Anonymous: My girls ass is tight. Normal look of it tight and nice, We rarely have sex due to busy schedule of both of us but we are getting married end of this year. the thing is some time after anal if we had a long time sex her ass gaped open, not huge a little. now she is concern that would be permenet, We love to have sex a lot. After we married we will be together more time and that is mean more anal for sure, would that gape be permenet or just for few sec, for now it gets normal.

Assuming that you take the proper care to gradually warm up her anus and loosen it before having sex, and aren’t causing any painful damage, any gaping or looseness after will start to tighten within minutes and be largely back to normal within a few hours or sooner. The baseline tightness can be a little looser still for a few days after sometimes, but this doesn’t matter for much except for the ease of having more anal sex the next day.

Regular healthy anal sex actually improves muscle tone and control in the anus rather than harming it. There are anal only couples who have been having daily anal sex for many years with zero issues. If you do everything properly and never cause her any pain during anal, chances are you can have as much anal sex as you want, even many times per day, without causing any permanent looseness (although if you’re doing it that often she’ll stay looser just because she’s have sex so often she doesn’t have time to tighten up after—but if you’re having sex that often, you want that, because it means much less preparation each time).

dragonstout: Soo what are your thoughts on long term AO Lifestyle with prolapsing ?? Joined the site today!

Healthy anal sex, even in a long-term anal only relationship, does not cause anal prolapse. Damage to the anus/rectum, or an already unhealthy or at risk anus/rectum causes prolapse.

Anonymous: I think a woman looks more beautiful when being taken anally. There is something about it that feels very natural. I’d love to have mostly anal with my wife if I could but she say’s it is something we shouldn’t do too often. I sure wish I could change her mind because I’ve always felt like it is something “meant to be” between us. She even gets off better thru anal like I’ve heard others say. But she still finds reasons not to. Is our situation common do you think?

Why does she not want to do it too often? Is it because she prefers vaginal, because she thinks vaginal is the “proper” way to regularly have sex, or because she’s worried about health issues from frequent anal sex?

Anonymous: I have been asking things here for a while now, but I feel this is the best place to ask as I have followed this blog for a while now and practice healthy and enjoyable anal sex. My question is: I have never gone all the way in my girlfriend’s ass. I’m 6.5″ but I only penetrate about 3″ max. Are there any side effects for the girl from going deep in her ass, and is it ok to cum in deep?

Anal sex for most people occurs within the rectum, which varies in length from person to person, with an average of about 4.7″. At the upper end of the rectum, there is a sharp bend to the person’s left and it transitions into the sigmoid colon. When an object (a penis or a dildo or what have you) bumps into that bend, it can at times be painful for the person but generally does not cause harm simply to bump into it without being forceful.

If you are gentle and the person is able to relax enough, it can be possible to (temporarily) straighten that bend, assuming your penis is longer than their rectum, and penetrate into the sigmoid colon. This can potentially be very pleasurable for both people if done correctly, but care must be taken to avoid hurting the person being penetrated.

There is also a higher chance of encountering fecal matter beyond that bend. The rectum generally remains empty except right before one feels the need to go to the bathroom, but the colon itself may contain fecal matter that hasn’t yet progressed into the rectum.

If you have not reached the end of the rectum and are simply staying within its first 3 inches, there is no risk from deeper penetration of the rectum, and there is no problem with deep ejaculation either.

Anonymous: I have submitted my personal experience for a while now, but now I am nervous about something else too. Frankly, we are not a 100% anal only couple. She has a small butt plug she bought before we tried anal. Now she says she likes to wear it for a while, not for long, like a hour or may be half an hour when she cooks or doing simple house work, but even she is curious about it—is it going to have a negative effect somehow in her ass?

No. There is no indication that even long term butt plug wear (days, weeks, months at a time with only several minute breaks) causes harm. It’s possible that a very large toy could cause harm to someone not prepared for it, but it’s likely going to cause discomfort far, far, far before any harm occurs. A small, comfortable plug can safely be worn even all day or longer with no issues at all (and it helps train the anal muscles, making future anal sex and pleasure easier).

There are so many girls out there spreading things claiming anal sex not good or that girls never should try it, entirely because of their own bad experiences. But the problem is not anal sex, the problem is how they tried it. My GF and I have been enjoying anal for some months now, and she is not complaining about so called bad experiences. So I say stop spreading rumors if you don’t like it. It is your loss. Let others enjoy it, as they should be. Others should share their personal thoughts about this too, including if your girl enjoys it.