Hello again and I hope you are well.
I have previously written to you and described my relationship with my husband, both before, during and post pregnancy. You’d been kind enough to show kindness and understanding of the challenges we’ve been facing as couple during these difficult times. There is much to be said for sharing your problems, and where it is around such an intimate topic, anonymously and with a stranger seems to work best. As I think I said before, I’d not been able to find much help on the usual forums and felt I wouldn’t have found many people open to discussing the topic.
I wanted to keep you up to date and let you know that the advice you have given has been useful and I’d like to thank you for it.
First, I’m generally feeling much better, both physically and emotionally. For a while there I was worried that I may have been suffering postpartum depression, but if I was close to that then I have recovered now. My body is recovering, as is my energy, and with it my confidence. I would have thought I would be used to it after our first child, but the second was very different. They do say that no two pregnancies are alike.
As you know, I was really missing those happy times during the early and mid stages of the pregnancy. For weeks and weeks now I have been making the effort to make time for my husband and anal sex as you suggested. It’s no easy thing but I am so glad now that I have. ‘Make it till you fake it’ has worked (most of the time) and we are both in a better place now. My libido and energy has returned almost to the same levels as before.
It was physically and emotionally demanding at first, I won’t lie, and sometimes I did want to ask him to stop. Somewhere along the way both have become so much easier that I’m now finding myself looking forward to sex rather than dreading it. We spoon mostly (it brings back good memories) and we don’t rush anything, just taking the time to enjoy each others bodies. My husband is very happy and I’m getting as much out of that as I am for myself.
Neither of us is feeling any strong desire for vaginal sex at this stage. I almost can’t keep up with the changes in my preferences. It is very confusing! But I think we’ll just continue doing what we are doing for now and enjoy what we have.
Thanks again for your support. I wonder if any of your followers have had similar experiences? I have read many posts but most relate to younger couples or those without much experience. I hope my story can help others. There isn’t much out there for women/mothers who have been through what I have, or if they have they aren’t discussing it.
I’m really glad to hear that things have been working out well for the two of you and that you’ve regained your arousal and enjoyment of anal sex and being anal only. I’ve no doubt that as you continue, it will just continue to improve even more.
Thanks for taking the time to update us! If anyone else has anything to add from their own similar experiences, I encourage sending an ask or submission to share as well.
The original version of this post on Tumblr received the following response.
alwaysanalblog: It has been an inspiring story and something that we see more and more often as the awareness of the anal only lifestyle increases. I sense that people are more open than ever before to seeking advice and getting the facts around what is now a common issue.
And while the anal only lifestyle community is clear about our bias, we don’t tell people what they must do, instead presenting facts, reason and guidance so that people may make up their own minds. Kay wanted badly to recapture the intimacy and excitement she had known before with her husband, yet if she had gone elsewhere it is likely she would have been made to feel bad about such nostalgia.
And is it just me or are increasing numbers of women coming out in support of anal only and seeking answers from the community? I’ve also seen women give much more thought and consideration to their own personal journey and the implications for their sexual relationships. More often that not women tend to have a greater patience and dedication to making it work once they’ve decided to make the change in their lives. Contrary to popular opinion that it is they that have to be persuaded, they actually appear to be the ones taking the subject seriously and driving the couples acceptance of anal only.
We are told time and again that the desire for anal is coming from men only and that porn is behind the rise, but stories such as this show this clearly isn’t true. Anal only is for everyone.