Category: Messages From Readers

A majority of the content on this blog is messages from readers, whether requests for advice, venting of frustrations, or shared stories and experiences. If you have your own question to ask or comment to share, send us a message.


Message: Double Anal Leading to Anal Fisting

Loren: We have been doing double anal with hubby for many years but can’t do it all the time. Usually with his cock and a toy but twice with another man and many times with a trans woman which we both enjoy. This has led to anal fisting which puts me out of commission for at least a week. And of course we fuck the trans woman and the ass to mouth tasting each others ass on hubby’s cock is a huge turn on.

Is double anal all the time a goal for you, or do you prefer it as something occasional? With practice, I’m sure that you could make it a more regular thing if you wanted to.

As for fisting putting you out of commission for a week, it sounds like spending more time on warmup and gradually doing it more often until it doesn’t leave you sore or in need of recovery could be a good idea so you can enjoy it regularly without needing to take such a long break after.

Message: Pussy Denial?

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

ripebabylady: What’s your opinion on Pussy denial? Do you think it’s important in an anal only relatioship?

I think that it’s dependent on each person’s individual interpretation of anal only.

For some, anal only primarily means no vaginal sex, and mixing some external vaginal or clitoral stimulation, or even fingering or use of a toy vaginally, is okay so long as they don’t have vaginal intercourse. That’s the fundamental defining element of being anal only, so as far as I’m concerned, people can call themselves anal only if that’s the case.

For others, they want to have nothing to do with their pussy or clit, and only think it’s acceptable if they deny it completely. This is also anal only, but more advanced and with more options. It’s what works better for some people.

Ultimately, it’s up to each person to decide what works best for them within the framework of anal only!

Message: Vaginal Chastity Products

Anonymous: Hi, do you know any vaginal chastity products, or like some tapes to cover your front part. I tried to deny my pussy and also clit but it’s difficult to.

Vaginal chastity is a great option to learn to resist your pussy and clit when you’re trying to go anal only! There’s actually a section in our Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle focused on this topic with an overview of the various options: The Use of Chastity Devices in the Anal Only Lifestyle.

Good luck, and I hope that helps provide you with the information that you’re looking for!

Message: Should I Stay Virgin?

Anonymous: I’m 20, and a virgin. I read in other posts that you recommend girls who are virgins start with anal and stay vaginal virgins. I like the idea, but I want to know if you really think that I should, and why.

Anal porn has been my favorite for years, and thinking about doing it makes me so horny. I masturbate that way mostly but sometimes I rub my pussy too. Should I stop doing that if I go anal only? I’ve tried putting a toy in my pussy too, but it doesn’t feel as good as in my ass, which is why I’m thinking anal only would be a good idea.

I don’t want to be weird, though, and wouldn’t guys want to fuck my pussy too and get upset if I said no?

I definitely, unequivocally, recommend staying a vaginal virgin and going straight to anal only! Now, if someone has already had vaginal sex before going anal only, or really wants to try both and compare before committing to anal only, that’s fine too—whatever works for each person—but if you have the opportunity to keep your pussy virgin and totally unused, and that’s something that interests or appeals to you, then absolutely go for it!

The way I see it is, most girls who prefer anal but try vaginal end up anal only anyway and just regret that they wasted their virginity and didn’t stay pure anal only when they had the chance. By going straight to anal only and staying a vaginal virgin, there’s nothing to regret—you can always try vaginal sex later if you change your mind, but if you lose your vaginal virginity now, you can never go back to being a vaginal virgin again.

It sounds like you already know being an anal only vaginal virgin is the right path for you—you prefer anal, don’t enjoy vaginal masturbation, and are on an anal only blog asking for advice, so your decision is nearly made already. Commit to it. You won’t regret it.

As for what guys might think, that’s going to depend on the guy. Some guys might want pussy, and they’d be the wrong guys for you if you want anal only. Other guys absolutely prefer anal and anal only girls, and would love the idea of an anal only vaginal virgin girlfriend. If they don’t respect that your pussy is off limits for good, find someone who will.

Message: Double Anal and Gapes?

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

Anonymous: You keep enconraging gapes and double anal. They’re indeed a very sexy thing, but in reality wouldn’t you be afrait if the one good hole get’s loose there’s nothing to enjoy anymore?

While in fantasy, some people like the idea of women being stretched out to the point that they can’t enjoy even anal anymore, that doesn’t really happen in real life aside from major injury and nerve damage.

Gapes are just the result of learning to control your anal muscles and keep them relaxed open. Because you have that control, you can also let them tighten back up again too, when you’re ready to do so.

Stretching from increased usage, whether from larger partners, larger toys, or from double anal, doesn’t mean that you’re always loose, it just increases your upper limit of comfortable stretching. You can still stay tight when you want to have sex that way, and enjoy smaller penetration as well. Women like Roxy Raye, who can have massive gapes and enjoy huge toys, still close up tight after and can have “normal” anal sex too.

That said, some women simply prefer larger penetrations and over time may find that they want to focus on large toys or double anal, because thats what gives them the most pleasure, and that’s perfectly fine as well if it’s what they want and they’re able to sustain it.

Message: Condom Broke, He Wants to Go Anal Only

Jess: I always wanted to be anal only and today the opportunity finally came. I had sex with a guy but the condom broke and now we’re both paranoid about it. Now he wants to have only anal sex. But how will I transition to anal this fast??? Please, help.

Sounds like a great opportunity to get what you want, but be honest with him. Tell him you will need a little time to adjust to it at first, and go more slowly the first few weeks, gradually increasing how often you have sex. Wear a butt plug regularly when you aren’t having sex.

You may have to start out only doing it two or three days a week, and can do oral on days that you can’t do anal, and then every few weeks, increase it by another day a week, until you can do it as often as you like. Just listen to your body. If you’re getting sore, take it a little slower. If everything is fine, gradually go a bit more often.

Good luck, and keep us updated on how it goes!

Message: Anal Only Post-Pregnancy

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

I had a baby a year ago, and your post about matures and childbirth got me thinking abt my situation. I’m 27 (not exactly a mature) but childbirth did change things down there. When we began having sex again my husband was only interested in anal sex. (I started having regular anal sex when we got married, it was part of our deal because I didn’t gave him enough anal when we were dating, so I’m pretty used to anal, I don’t mind it) The problem is, it has been a year now. He always has some excuse to not do PIV, he says he prefers Anal so he just makes me cum with his hands so he can get to the butt fucking. 

Do you think it might have something to do with childbirth? Or is he AO curious like myself and decided to be AO? Should I let this continue since I don’t dislike anal? 

Thanks for reaching out! It sounds like it could be a combination of both, potentially.

It’s pretty common for people to be more attracted to anal during and after pregnancy, potentially in part because we instinctively know that anal is a natural form of birth control, and when pregnant, there’s no way to get pregnant again, so the reproductive drive isn’t really there and anal has more of a draw instead.

But he probably also is interested in anal only, like yourself, and has effectively said as much when he told you he prefers anal.

You should both talk about it—non-confrontationally—and decide together whether you want to commit to anal only going forward as a conscious and mutual decision. Obviously, I’d encourage you to stick with it, but ultimately it’s up to the both of you!

Message: Vaginal Tightness and Anal Only

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

Anonymous: What if you have to go anal only ’cause your pussy can’t get tight any more?

That’s a perfectly legitimate reason to go anal only as well, and one of many reasons that people do it. If you or your partner are unable to enjoy vaginal sex, switching to anal only makes a lot of sense and can provide a sexual outlet that’s equal to or better than vaginal and can restore confidence and sexuality.

Message: Making Safe Transition to Anal Only

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

Anonymous: Good Day Sir I really enjoy your blog. It is a great inspiration to me. I am a denial submissive. My Masters cunt is only allowed to cum when he wishes and that is not very often. I am perfectly happy with that. My Master now has expressed the desire to only have anal sex. We already have anal sex and I enjoy it very much. I would really like to accept his wish for me, I just want to do it safely. Do you have any tipps? How can I make the transition to an anal only slut without risking my health and not disappoint my Master? Humbly honey

Thank you, I’m glad that you enjoy my blog and that it inspires you. Congratulations on the decision to go anal only, it will be wonderful for the two of you and is well worth doing. It’s absolutely worth doing some research first in order to make the transition safely and ensure that it’s sustainable long-term so that you don’t need to stop later. Essentially, so long as you warm up properly beforehand and/or stay trained and warmed up by masturbating anally and wearing a butt plug regularly, and listen to your body and don’t do anything that actively hurts or stop if there’s any bleeding, rest a day or two, and try again. Those are usually only an issue when you’re first getting started. From there, establish a routine and try to stick with it as well as you’re able. The main thing that makes anal difficult is not doing it often enough, because your anal muscles tighten back up if they aren’t used, and need to be warmed up again. Ultimately getting to where you do it every day or every other day is ideal. If you need to transition more gradually, I’d start by doing anal at least one day a week (or more often if you already do it more often) and make that be your anal only day, and then every few weeks, adding an additional day per week that’s anal only and reducing a vaginal day, until after a few months you’ve transitioned to full time anal and no vaginal. For more information on this process in more detail, read the Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle.

Message: Real or Fantasy?

This message was originally posted to the Anal Only Bdsmlr blog, and is being cross-posted here.

Anonymous: The idea of going anal only is really hot! Is it something that you can really do or is it just a fantasy?

You can absolutely do it in reality, and while the captions on this blog are fictional scenarios and sometimes drift towards the fantastical a little bit, they’re intended to inspire people to make it their reality, not just to get off on it but not actually do it. There are many, many people out there who are practicing an active anal only lifestyle, and I encourage it for everyone who finds the idea interesting or appealing. Starting for a month or two without a long-term commitment can be a great way to explore the idea and see how you like it, and then if it works for you, keep going from there.