Choosing anal only is easy when you’re riding the excitement of discovery. Every plug, every stretch, every orgasm feels like a step toward something bigger. But commitment isn’t tested in the good moments—it’s tested when things get messy, inconvenient, or tempting in the wrong direction.

Here’s how to stay true to your AO life long term, and how to handle the moments that threaten to pull you off track.

Remember Why You Chose This

Your commitment isn’t random—it’s rooted in something. Maybe it’s the deeper pleasure. Maybe it’s the discipline. Maybe it’s the total rejection of pussy and the clarity that brings. Whatever it is, keep that front of mind. Write it down. Say it out loud. If you hit a slump, remind yourself: This is who I am. This is how I want to live.

Recognize That Setbacks Happen

Setbacks don’t erase your commitment—they test it. A missed plug day, a moment of curiosity, even a slip back into old habits doesn’t mean you’ve failed. What matters is what you do next. Treat it like any discipline: acknowledge it, understand why it happened, and recommit immediately.

Have Tools for the Hard Days

There will be days when AO feels harder—when you’re sore, tired, distracted, or when a partner pushes for something you’ve chosen to leave behind. Prepare for them.

• Keep a smaller, comfortable plug for recovery days.
• Have a go-to AO fantasy or video that reignites your focus.
• Keep physical reminders of your goals—plugs, toys, or even AO jewelry—somewhere visible.

Talk to Partners Early and Often

If you share your AO life with someone, keep them in the loop. Talk about boundaries, changes, and goals before they become points of friction. If a partner isn’t fully AO yet, help them understand that this isn’t a phase—it’s your standard.

Celebrate Your Wins

Staying anal only isn’t just about avoiding setbacks—it’s about noticing and appreciating progress. Celebrate anniversaries of AO commitment. Recognize new milestones in stretching or stamina. Share those moments with others in the community. Pride fuels persistence.

Bottom Line

Long-term AO is about choosing, again and again, to keep your ass at the center of your sex life and your identity. Setbacks don’t have to derail you. Every time you recommit, you’re proving—not to anyone else, but to yourself—that you’re serious.

The discipline is worth it. The pleasure is worth it. The lifestyle is worth it. Stay plugged, stay proud.

Davie: I’m 19 and I love anal! I’ve had sex a few times and anal is by far the best. Wish I could have more sex without pussy, but most people aren’t into it. Whenever I bring it up with my bros, they say it’s gay. Is loving anal really gay? What’s wrong with being a guy that loves anal only?

Thank you for reaching out, and I’m glad you’re discovering what you truly enjoy early on. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a guy who loves anal only. You’ve even tried both and you know anal feels better.

Unfortunately, while we’ve made a lot of progress away from it, a lot of guys still cling to this idea that anal is “gay,” as if any kind of sex involving the ass is somehow gay because gay men often do it. Never mind that both women and men have buttholes! That’s insecurity talking, not logic. Do they think blowjobs are gay too?

If you’re a man who enjoys anal sex with women and prefers it over vaginal sex, that’s not gay. That’s just your taste. Just like some people love giving head or using toys or only doing it in certain positions, many—most—guys prefer the way it feels to fuck a woman’s ass.

Keep owning what you prefer, and find women who share that preference and will go anal only with you. It’s well worth it to stop fucking pussy altogether.

Rafael: Hello, thank you for your blog. It has a lot of useful information and interesting user messages. I’m a gay male, mid-30s, bottom exclusive. After reading your double anal article, I wanted to try it out. My first attempt with dildos wasn’t successful, it felt awkward and difficult to achieve penetration, so I decided to change tactics.

I presented your blog to my boyfriend, let’s call him John, and he liked reading it as much as I did.
Then, I suggested John to use one of my dildos along with his penis. He accepted and we tried the next day. I was pushed to my limits and it was a bit painful, a similar pain that I felt when I was new to anal.
John was very helpful and patient, he gave me all the time I wanted, even if it meant only oral for the night. After many tries, I managed to take both John and the dildo at the same time.

And I have to say you are right. The feeling was incredibly intense! I was stretched to my limits but in a good way. I’m used to having prostate orgasms and didn’t have one that time but the effects were as powerful in different ways. I’ve heard about a type of anal orgasm that is focused on the sphincter and rectum, maybe it was that.

After that night, I wanted to go for the true double anal experience but there were problems. John and I are monogamous, we’ve been together for more than 5 years and we’ve never cheated on each other.
When I suggested having another man for double anal, John was uncomfortable. We talked a lot about it and I think he’s feeling insecure about his size since I enjoyed DAP a little bit too much. He even commented about the size of one of my dildos, something he never did before.

Here’s the thing, I love John. He’s a great partner and amazing in bed. I often have prostate orgasms with him. I’m now feeling guilty. Our life outside the bedroom is going strong but the sex now is less intense. There wasn’t another double anal night ever since my suggestion. I kinda don’t know what to do and want to hear your opinion about this.

It’s great that you were able to experience DAP together—even using a dildo, that’s a huge milestone, especially as a first time. The fact that it triggered something new in you doesn’t mean you’ve outgrown what you have, or that you don’t enjoy sex with your partner. Double anal is a type of stimulation that can’t be replicated with just one penis or dildo, it’s a unique sensation and experience that requires multiple dildos, partners, or a combination thereof.

It also makes perfect sense that John might feel insecure or hesitant. When a partner sees you crave something that they alone can’t physically give, it can stir up feelings of inadequacy—even if they’re totally unfounded. That doesn’t mean he isn’t enough. It means he’s human. The best thing you can do now is help him feel chosen again. Let him know how much that DAP night meant because it was with him, not in spite of it. Remind him how you trust him to take you to your edge safely, and how no toy or fantasy can replace the connection you have.

As for involving another man—it’s okay that the idea was hard for him. But it doesn’t have to be off the table forever. You’ve already laid the foundation by being honest. What matters now is showing him that this isn’t about replacing or comparing—it’s about exploring something you want to share. You can keep the door open gently. Maybe frame it less as “bringing someone in” and more as “experiencing something together that we couldn’t otherwise do.” Let him feel like it’s an adventure you’re inviting him on—not a compromise he has to make.

In the meantime, you don’t have to give up DAP entirely. Keep training. Try dual toys again now that you’ve done it with him. Keep your body open and engaged. And most of all, keep celebrating what you and John already have. This doesn’t have to be a roadblock—it can be the beginning of something even deeper between you.

L: I’m 23, and I’ve never had sex. For a long time I felt like I was behind and really missing out, but more recently as I’ve learned more about anal only I’m actually glad that I didn’t have vaginal sex and lose my virginity with my pussy. I’ve been reading a lot, watching a lot of anal porn, and masturbating anally and I want to make my first time really special and train myself to be able to have double anal sex to lose my virginity and hopefully if it goes well, stay double anal only. I think it would be really fitting, not to mention exciting, to have saved myself for something special like this.

I’ve been wearing a butt plug most days, going bigger every month or so, and I’ve been masturbating with dildos a lot. I found I really like the feeling of a big stretch which is a good sign I suppose, and I’ve started using two dildos within a few minutes most sessions. Is there any advice you can give me to be ready to go straight to DAP the very first time without needing to warm up? And of course, how I can meet guys who are interested in DAP and who would be good to have sex with the first time?

I love your take on that, not missing out by not having sex, but saving yourself for the right thing. And I fully support and encourage your desire to go straight to double anal. You’re doing exactly the right things with your training and practice for it. Keep it up, work up to larger dildos until you’re at or exceeding average penis thickness every time you train, and start practicing trying to penetrate with both dildos together at the same time. You’ll get there, and once you can do that every day, you’re ready.

Finding two guys to lose your virginity to might be the harder thing, but it’s very doable. If you have two close male friends you could bring it up to them, or you could seek out people in a group sex lifestyle and see if anyone is interested. Men experienced with double anal would be best, but even just those who are open to or experienced with group sex could be quickly adapted to DAP. Just be clear you want it to be double anal only, no single anal, no vaginal, and set those ground rules immediately from the start.

Going anal only isn’t just a decision—it’s a process. It takes time, discipline, and the right mindset to fully disconnect from vaginal habits and embrace your butthole as your true sexual center. That transformation doesn’t happen overnight. But with intention and consistency, it can happen faster than you think.

Here’s a proven 90-day timeline to transition into a fully anal only lifestyle—mentally, physically, emotionally, and sexually.

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Day 0: Your Decision Point

This is the moment everything changes. You decide: no more pussy. No more fingers, no more clit, no more “exceptions.” You’re not waiting for someone to give you permission. You’re giving it to yourself. From this moment on, your ass is your only sexual access point.

Now the real work begins.

Days 1–30: Detox and Foundation

Goals:

• Cut out all vaginal contact—no exceptions, not even “just touching.”
• Begin daily plug wear for at least 1–2 hours (working up as needed).
• Masturbate anally at least several times a week, including whenever cravings are hard to resist.
• Journal cravings or temptations and how you overcame them.
• Tell your partner (or yourself, if solo) that vaginal sex is no longer on the table.

The first month is about rewiring your brain and your habits. You’re not “depriving” yourself—you’re redirecting. Every urge toward vaginal contact becomes an opportunity to re-center around your ass. Expect resistance. That’s normal. Stay committed.

Support Tip:
Install a small but meaningful ritual—e.g., plugging up when you wake up, or lighting a candle before stretching—to reinforce that this is your new norm.

Days 31–60: Stretch and Surrender

Goals:

• Increase plug size and wear time—aim for a large plug 4–6 hours daily or overnight.
• Continue intentional anal masturbation only—no pussy contact even to climax.
• Replace all porn with anal only content (include double anal porn as often as possible).
• If in a relationship, continue to maintain anal only sex exclusively—no “occasional” pussy slip-ins.

This is the surrender phase. Your ass becomes your comfort, your craving, your release. The plug, toys and cock no longer feels foreign—it feels essential. Vaginal denial is no longer an active struggle. It’s just who you are now.

Support Tip:
Join online communities or forums (like this blog) where anal only is celebrated. Hearing others’ success stories reinforces your own.

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Days 61–90: Integration and Identity

Goals:

• Reach full-time plug wear whenever not actively being penetrated.
• Work up to to long-term anal stretching goals, like larger toys or even double anal.
• Commit to long-term anal only, and don’t go back to vaginal just because you’re done with your initial challenge.

By this stage, anal only isn’t something you’re “trying.” It’s who you are. Your body responds differently. Your fantasies shift. Your hole is open, hungry, and fulfilled—and your pussy feels irrelevant, untouched, and sealed in the past.

Support Tip:
Mark Day 90 with a celebration. A full-day plug challenge. A DAP session. A new custom plug. Make it real. You’ve earned it.

Beyond Day 90: Lifelong, Plugged, Proud

Anal only isn’t a challenge—it’s your lifestyle now. You may still face the occasional temptation, but they lose power quickly. The further you get from vaginal contact, the more distant it feels. The more time you spend open, stretched, used and loved through your ass, the more right your body feels.

If you’re just starting this journey: don’t rush. But don’t doubt. The timeline works. Thousands of women have gone from curious to committed in 90 days or less—and never looked back.

Riley: I’ve been doing anal only for almost two years and recently started experimenting with double anal with my husband and his close friend. When it works, it’s absolutely incredible—stretching, overwhelming, intimate, and deeply fulfilling in a way I didn’t expect. But I’ve also had sessions where my body just wouldn’t take it, or I ended up too sore to keep up my plug routine afterward.

We really want DAP to be a regular part of our life. Not just an occasional treat, but a foundation. But I also don’t want to risk setbacks or burnout. Do you have any advice on how to build up the stamina and flexibility to make double anal sustainable, not just possible? I’m all in—I just want to do it smartly.

It’s amazing to hear how much DAP is already positively affecting you both emotionally and physically. It really is an amazing thing when it goes well. If you want to start doing it more regularly or even go double anal only, you’ve got to get to where it works easily all the time, not just sometimes.

Double anal demands more from your body than single anal, and it takes time to adapt to that, especially when you’re doing it regularly. You need to build up to where you can take two cocks at a moment’s notice with ease.

I suggest more regular plug wear in between sessions, especially focusing on larger plugs with thicker necks to keep your stretch active. Masturbate/train regularly with two dildos, or a large single dildo, so that you continue getting used to the more active penetration of two cocks in your ass together. When it’s just your boyfriend, you can use a dildo alongside his cock to stay warmed up for double anal.

After sessions, use aloe vera gel (make sure it’s pure aloe vera and not mixed with alcohol or other additives that may be harmful for anal use) on your anus and rectum to sooth it and help it recover.

Gradually increase the frequency and over the course of a month or two you should be where you can do double anal every time you have sex!

If you’ve ever told someone you’re anal only, you’ve probably heard one—or all—of these. The defenses of vaginal sex come quick and loud, often with a smug certainty that you’ll eventually “come around.” But here’s the truth: most arguments for vaginal sex aren’t just weak—they’re wrong.

Let’s walk through 10 of the most common ones, and why they fall apart the moment you look a little closer.

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1. “It’s what the vagina is made for.”

So? That doesn’t mean it has to be used. Tonsils were “made” to catch bacteria, but most people don’t think twice about getting them removed. Just because a body part has a purpose doesn’t mean it deserves your attention. Choosing anal only is about knowing what feels better, not what was assigned to you by anatomy textbooks.

2. “It’s more natural.”

There is nothing more natural than a well-trained ass taking what it was meant to take. Deep penetration, full stretch, complete surrender—that’s not artificial. That’s primal. If anything, vaginal sex is the lazy default. Anal is the conscious choice.

3. “It’s how you make babies.”

Reproduction is not the measure of a sex act’s worth. Not every woman wants to breed, and even if she does, that doesn’t mean her pussy needs to be her regular form of recreational sex. Anal only is about pleasure and identity—not breeding function.

4. “It’s more comfortable.”

For whom? Many women find anal becomes more comfortable—and far more pleasurable—once they’ve committed to it fully. Vaginal sex can suffer from pain, dryness, irritation, and emotional disconnect. Anal, when trained and respected, opens up a level of bliss that the pussy just can’t match.

5. “Men want it.”

Not the right men. Anal only men don’t want your pussy touched. They don’t see it as an option. They want your ass exclusively, and they want to share that commitment with you. If a guy can’t stop asking about your pussy, he’s not aligned with your lifestyle. Let him go.

6. “You’re missing out.”

No, you’ve evolved past it. Most people who say this haven’t experienced true anal devotion. They’re clinging to what they know, not what’s better. “Missing out” implies vaginal sex is some kind of peak. It isn’t. It’s a habit most haven’t had the courage to break.

7. “It’s more intimate.”

That’s a projection. True intimacy is about trust, surrender, and being known—and there is no deeper surrender than opening your butthole and taking everything there. Anal makes you feel claimed, filled, owned in the best possible way. There is no comparison.

8. “Anal is just for kink.”

Anal is not a kink. It’s the foundation of sex. It’s a way of living, relating, and loving. Calling it a “kink” is a way for people to minimize it, to treat it as an accessory instead of an identity.

9. “You’ll change your mind.”

People say this about everything they don’t understand. But the truth is, most people who commit to anal only feel more clarity, more confidence, and more connection as time goes on—not less. If anything, they wonder why they didn’t start sooner.

10. “It’s just sex—why does it matter?”

If it’s “just sex,” then why is everyone so defensive when you take the pussy off the table?

Because it does matter. Where you’re penetrated, how you’re loved, and what you give access to all shape your selfhood. Anal only is not a restriction—it’s a refinement. And it absolutely matters.

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Your pussy is unnecessary. Your ass is essential. And when you stop listening to bad arguments, you finally start hearing your own truth.

Eva: I’m single and want to stay anal only and not use my pussy at all. But it feels awkward to bring up to new partners — some think I’m joking or fetishizing. How do you bring up anal only while dating without scaring people off?

This is such a great question, and one a lot of single anal only women deal with, even if they don’t talk about it openly. First off, you’re not wrong to want what you want. Wanting to be anal only—even as a single woman—is completely valid, and it doesn’t mean you’re joking, performing, or fetishizing anything. It just means you know your body and your boundaries. That should be respected, not questioned.

When it comes to bringing it up while dating, the key is confidence. You don’t have to dump it on someone in the first five minutes, but you also shouldn’t feel like you need to apologize or tiptoe around it. Once things start moving toward physical or emotional intimacy, be direct: “I just want to be clear early on—I’m anal only. I don’t use my pussy at all, and it’s not something I’m open to. If that’s not for you, I totally understand, but it’s important to me.”

Saying it plainly—not defensively—usually does more to disarm than over-explaining. You’re not being extreme. You’re being honest. Some people will be confused or surprised, and that’s okay. It’s not your job to make them instantly understand—it’s your job to hold your line.

The ones who get it (and they are out there) will respect you more for being clear and committed. And the ones who don’t? They were never right for you anyway.

Anal only isn’t just a preference—it’s a part of who you are. You’re not asking too much. You’re offering something beautiful. Anyone lucky enough to be with you should understand that.

And if they don’t, move along—plugged and proud.

Ronald: We’ve been anal only for almost two years and love it, but when my wife’s sister found out, she made it a whole thing and said we were depraved. How do you deal with judgment from family?

Good for you and your wife. Two years of anal only is something to be proud of, and I’m glad to hear you’re both loving it. Keep it up, and don’t look back!

Unfortunately, judgment from family—especially when they don’t understand what anal only really means—isn’t uncommon. People tend to react harshly to things that challenge their assumptions, especially around sex. And when it comes from someone close like a sister, it can feel even more personal.

The truth is, choosing anal only isn’t depraved. It’s healthy, natural, intentional and intimate. You know that, because you’ve been living it for the last two years. It’s about connection, trust, and a shared sense of purpose between two people who know what they want. There’s nothing shameful about that. If anything, it’s something most couples could learn from—setting boundaries, committing to each other’s pleasure, and not just doing what’s expected by default.

When it comes to dealing with judgment, the best approach is calm confidence. You don’t need to argue or justify your choices. You can simply say, “This is what works for us, and we’re happy.” That’s often more disarming than trying to convince someone who’s reacting from a place of discomfort or ignorance.

You don’t owe her any further explanation if you don’t want to discuss it more, but if you’d like her to see your side, try to talk about all the positives and why it’s such a good experience for the both of you. Maybe she’ll back off, or maybe she’ll even become curious and want to learn more or try it herself. Those who are most outspoken against anal often are those who are secretly interested in it.

Pam & Sam: I’ve been wanting to share some of my personal experiences and confirm a few things I’ve read here. I’m a woman, happily married with no kids, and over the last couple of years, my husband and I have discovered a fierce passion for the stag & vixen lifestyle.

Together, we dive into this wild world, exploring swinger clubs and tight-knit circles where we connect with other couples—and sometimes with multiple men. Sometimes my husband jumps right in, other times he prefers to watch me take full control. This dynamic has pulled us closer and added a deliciously raw edge to our relationship.

Not long ago, I took a bold leap from double penetration to double anal. At first, it was challenging, but it quickly became a game-changer. I never imagined we’d enjoy it this much. This new thrill lets me—and us—fully indulge in group sex action, and I won’t lie—I got hooked on double anal. Now, we’re enjoying it to the absolute fullest without me having to step into porn or expose myself publicly. It’s our private, dirty secret—and it feels fucking amazing.

He even wanted me—actually allowed me, call it what you want—to go solo with double anal while he watched a couple of times. He told me it was mind-blowing for him to see how I was completely owning all those men, stretching and filling my ass to the max. The way I mastered every inch had him utterly captivated. You can’t imagine how empowered and damn sexy I felt afterward. That raw, intense feeling of control and pleasure was intoxicating—pure power.

For us, this lifestyle is about personal growth and self-discovery, the thrill of voyeuristic and shared pleasure, and exploring sexual possibilities that keep our relationship vibrant and alive. It’s a journey that requires trust, communication, and openness, but the rewards are beyond worth it.

I hope sharing this encourages others who are curious or considering this path. Living boldly and loving freely has truly transformed us.

I love being a hotwife. There’s something wildly liberating about owning this role with my husband’s full support. Despite the steamy encounters with other men and couples, there are no romantic feelings involved—our love is exclusive, fierce, and rock solid.

Thanks so much for sharing, I’m glad that you’re enjoying this experience and have made the transition from DP to double anal. I hope that you are also embracing anal only as part of this transition and no longer use your vagina anymore. If you really enjoy DAP over time you may find yourself wanting to explore going double anal only!