Message: My Anal Only Experience

Anonymous: I just discovered your blog and wanted to share my anal experience because I think its objectively pretty hot and you seem like folks who would enjoy it. My boyfriend is 12 years older than me and only likes anal and never lets me touch my pussy during sex. And while I really like anal I can’t come from it alone, but I get really turned on by being submissive to him so I just sort of learned to focus on his pleasure, and now there’s nothing I like more than the feeling of him tensing up and cumming inside of me and knowing that I satisfied him.

Granted we don’t have anal everyday because it’s a bit too much work so on the days we can’t I go down on him whenever he wants. But on the days we do have anal he’s usually really rough and wild and does a bunch of fun kinky stuff like spit on me, or slap my butt and my pussy, or call me mean naughty names.

As much as I like our sex life I’m always on the prowl for new kinky things we could do, and was wondering if you have any suggestions for novel kinky stuff we could try.

A couple things come to mind based on what you’ve shared.

  • You mention that you can’t orgasm from anal alone, and that you don’t touch your pussy during sex. Do you touch it when you’re on your own and masturbating? While everyone is different, something that has worked for a lot of women to start experiencing anal orgasms without clit stimulation is to also transition to anal only when orgasming, so that their body can adjust fully to anal stimulation only and learn to orgasm that way. Clit orgasms tend to be a lot easier but less satisfying and because they happen more quickly, they can prevent getting to the point where you orgasm from anal.
  • What part of having anal every day is too much work for you, is it the cleaning or the warming up/stretching part of the preparation process? If it’s cleaning, you might try a higher fiber diet or taking fiber supplements as a way to naturally stay cleaner and require less manual cleaning. If it’s warming up and stretching, have you tried wearing a butt plug for at least a few hours a day if not longer (sleeping with one in can work well)? This can really help with staying warmed up for anal sex and making it more spontaneous, and also boosts your anal arousal and sensitivity. As you get used to wearing a plug longer term, you can try experimenting with 24/7 plugging.

Beyond that, there are all sorts of fun things you could try. Tape on your pussy to cover it up and prevent access to it, numbing cream to prevent feeling anything in your clit temporarily, stretching with bigger plugs or toys, double anal play, ass to mouth, rimming, and more!

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2 responses to “Message: My Anal Only Experience”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I suppose its not so much the work that is the issue, its more so that I read you shouldn’t clean out your butt everyday because doing so removes helpful bacteria or something of that sort.

    And I’m actually kinda into the fact that I don’t orgasm during sex, I like feeling like I’m just sort of being used for his pleasure, and I know he really likes it too so I don’t really want to change anything on that front.

    • analonlylifestyle says:

      Fair enough if you don’t want to orgasm.

      If you’d like to do anal every day, you can still do so, though. A daily deep enema may not be a good idea, but if you’re just using a smaller amount of water to wash out your rectum without going deeper into your colon, there should be no issue. And, a lot of people do use daily enemas as well without an issue, so as long as you’re just using water, it’s probably less of an issue than people think.

      You can also control hygiene more with diet and fiber supplements. Low fat, high fiber diets tend to result in less cleaning needed. See the Hygiene page in the Guide for more information.

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