Message: How Do I Let Him Know I Want Anal?
Beth: I’ve been married for a few months and my husband so badly wants to fuck my ass. He has fingered my ass during sex a few times and even rimmed me on our wedding night. He knows I’m open to it but he doesn’t quite know just how much it turns me on. He’s tried to rim my ass and press his cock into me but I’m much too tight and he’s much too endowed. I know there will have to be a little training before but I don’t really know how to start & I think he’s a little impatient. I purchased a butt plug and I wear it at least once a week when he isn’t home but I know it isn’t enough.
Do I just wear it and surprise him with it? Do I ask him to plug me next time things get heated? I just don’t know the best way to bridge the gap!
It sounds like your primary concern is not being ready enough, because it seems that you do want it as much or more than him, you just want to make sure that his impatience or him being overeager doesn’t hurt you and it’s an enjoyable experience for the both of you. Is that a fair assessment?
I’d suggest making the butt plug wear a much more frequent thing for you, and to start masturbating regularly while wearing the plug, as well as fingering your ass during masturbation. Our Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle has a section on Anal Training that provides more information that process. Once you’re comfortable doing it more regularly, I would also read the Guide to Having Anal Sex for the First Time and then decide if you want your husband to help train you the rest of the way before having sex or dive right into trying it with him.
Once you do want to admit your enthusiasm about trying it, I would just be open about it and tell him. He’ll love to hear that you want to do anal too, if he’s as excited as it seems about trying it with you. Communication is best for everyone. But you can also be wearing a plug when you tell him that, and show him, and he’ll love seeing that too!
Good luck, and I hope you have a wonderful time exploring anal together!
My wife and I were in a similar position where we both wanted anal but she didn’t admit it until after we were married for a few years because she was embarrassed, even though she knew I wanted it. We started doing it a lot after she finally said she wanted it, and now we’ve been only doing anal for the last few years. So definitely agree to communicate! We would’ve probably been anal only years before if we’d communicated better earlier.