secret-submissive-little: What should i do to prepare for anal sex? i can take a large plug but i dont know how to go from there

You may want to experiment with a penis-sized dildo first, but if you can comfortably wear a large plug for at least 15 to 30 minutes, then you’re already better off than many people who want to try anal.

Before you plan to have anal sex, you may want to wear your plug for a while first to have some initial relaxation. Take a hot shower or bath before, and then ideally have an orgasm before as well to further relax you. After removing the plug, have your partner massage lube into you with his fingers, starting first with a single finger and working up to three or so.

Once he’s able to move three fingers in and out at a moderate pace without discomfort to you, lubricate his penis and prepare for penetration. There are three positions commonly recommended for first time anal: doggy, cowgirl, and spooning. Some work better for some people than others, so if something doesn’t work well, try another. Positioning yourself over him and lowering yourself down onto his penis is my personal favorite for first time anal, because it puts you in complete control over the speed and depth and angle of penetration and lets you stop and rest a moment if things become uncomfortable or painful. You can do a similar thing with doggy if he remains still while you push back.

Once he’s as far inside as he can go, pause a moment so you can get used to the feeling, then slowly move. You can build up the speed, but do it slowly and back off if it hurts. As you become comfortable with the sensations, you can change positions and/or give him more control.

Absolutely make sure your partner understands to stop immediately if you tell him to. If it hurts, you don’t want to keep doing it or push through the pain until it goes away, you want to stop what you’re doing and back off slightly and wait a moment until the pain fades, then try again more slowly and build up more gradually. You don’t need to stop altogether, and as long as you’re careful any pain should fade very quickly if you don’t keep pushing through it. It’s worth taking your time and having a more enjoyable experience rather than causing actual injury and preventing further experimentation for a few days to a week while you heal.

If you do experience bleeding, however, it’s either due to too little lube or going too quickly without being warmed up enough. It can occasionally happen as you start out and learn what you can and can’t do, and while it’s usually nothing serious, it’s almost always best to stop as soon as you notice this and take a break for a few days before trying again, just to avoid causing any actual damage.

It can take patience, lube, and trial and error, but the payout can be well worth it. Keep trying and enjoy.

Back in the heady days of college, my first sexual experiences were awkward and inhibited. My first girlfriend was a virgin, just like I was, and that meant most of what we knew about sex we learned from awkward experimentation or the x-rated VHS tapes we rented (while extremely red-faced and embarrassed) from our local video store.

Some part of our x-rated education she took to immediately (for a virgin, she certainly learned to give great head.) Other aspects – not so much. The first time she watched an anal scene, for example, her immediate response was: “Ewwww! That’s gross.”As it turned out, she did eventually warm to anal – largely thanks to the fact that we were impoverished students who couldn’t afford condoms, and ‘you couldn’t get pregnant that way.’ Later, she even secretly developed a bit of a thrill knowing that she was doing something ‘dirty’ that none of her girlfriends would ever let their boyfriends do to them (or, at least, not that they’d admit to.)Anal sex back then was considered dirty and forbidden.

But flash forward almost fifteen years, to a bridal shower with a bunch of girls toasting to their soon not-to-be-single friend, and it appeared the opposite was the case. I was waiting for my wife at a brunch bar, and idly eavesdropping on the bridal banter. My ears perked up when one of the girls joked that the bride’s wedding night would be a bit of an anti-climax – as she’d been living with the groom for a year before the wedding and had presumably pre-consummated their marriage many times before the big day. In response, her pal joked that there was another ‘virginity’ she could give up that night – until the bride herself admitted cheekily “too late for that!”

Leaning a little closer, I listened in on what turned out to be a candid – and colorful – conversation about the ins, outs and back-ins again of anal sex.

“Birthdays and Christmas only,” joked one wife. “When I want him to do something,” joked another. “Actually,” admitted the third, “I rather like it, myself.” She then proceeded to discuss keeping it clean, what kind of lubrication to use and even her favorite position (the third wife liked anal when she was on her back. When pressed, the others admitted to only attempting it doggy style.)

In addition to an impromptu erection, the anal-themed conversation also gave me a unique peek into how things had changed over the last decade and a half.

Sodomy had gone from being a sinful secret to becoming an almost socially-acceptable topic of conversation (at least after a few mimosas.) Here were a bunch of girls discussing lubes and ‘loosening up’ as casually as they discussed nail polish and Pilates.

[…]

What I find remarkable, though, is what a complete 360 has occured. In the space of my (brief) sexual career, we’ve gone from women like my first girlfriend fretting that they’re ‘sluts’ for giving boys a backdoor entry – to anally-enthusiastic women like my wife positively dismissing girls who don’t do anal. “They’re prudes,” she says.

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Anonymous: How often do you get fucked in the ass?/how often would you like to be

princesspoutypantzz: I have butt sex everytime I have sex, and idk a minimum of 3 times a week.

nymphettess: why does anal feel SO much better omg

That’s the way it is for many women. Vaginal might feel good (or might not) but anal, done correctly, amplifies orgasms so much more.

Being ‘anal-only’ is most definitely a niche, but I have found many women who would otherwise be vaginally centred sexually, to be very open to solely anal conversion if it’s presented as ‘our special little secret’ The concept that she’s doing what is considered to be taboo for the rank and file is turn-on enough, but to be doing it exclusively, as your ‘special girl’ can have a an even greater effect. Of course, this won’t be the case for every woman, but I have found the open-minded ones are generally conducive to being converted.

My current GF, an anal virgin at age 30, until she met me, would definitely be confused if I wanted vaginal penetration nowadays. If we are having sex she rolls onto her belly and spreads her cheeks as if it’s the natural thing to do; which to her it actually is. And she has learned to draw pleasure from anal intercourse too – a little stimulation of her clitoris can lead to some explosive anal orgasms, though I have always found this takes sustained deep thrusting to loosen her fully.

I don’t expect EVERY woman to want or like anal, but I’m only interested in the ones who DO!

getflymore: How do you keep the ass clean for sex considering the fact it is a shit hole..

If you have good hygiene and a healthy, high-fiber diet, your rectum should be fairly clean and empty all the time except when you feel the need to go to the bathroom. Taking a shower to clean the exterior and then wearing a butt plug for half an hour or so before sex is usually all you really need to do to prepare most of the time.

Many people prefer anal sex to vaginal sex. The science behind this phenomenon is that there are many nerve endings in the anus that bring good feelings when they get stimulated. But is it okay to have anal sex? And more importantly, is it harmful?

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The human body is designed in an extremely practical way: while the sex organs serve to procreate, the rectum and anus serve to expel body waste. The anus seemingly has no sexual role and provides no feelings of pleasure. It is considered by socially to be a dirty part of the body, which explains the reluctance to use it for sex.

Male and female pleasure

• Men are often the ones who suggest anal sex to their partners because it provides them with intense pleasure. As the anal passage is narrower than the vagina, the penis is gripped more tightly, and the man’s feelings of pleasure increase tenfold.
• Women can also derive pleasure from anal sex and some are even capable of reaching orgasm! Gradually and gently is the way to go, with the man paying full attention to what his partner tells him.

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