Category: Anal Sex

Message: Anal Only With Trans Girlfriend

Steven: Hello. First of all, thank you for all your work, I’ve been a big fan for years. I’m seeking advice. It’ll be a bit long, and quite peculiar to explain…

I’m a 32yo male who’s been into anal for a long, long time (my first time at 16yo was anal, we had no condom and no birth pill, and it’s been my favorite way to fuck ever since). Four years ago, I met a girl through a dating site. Both our profiles mentioned “anal only”, our mutual pictures pleased each other very much, and we got a very good contact through chatting. We met at a bar and connected immediately: she’s smart, funny, extremely sexy and feminine, classy. She offered me to go to her place (you bet I will), and we jumped at each other as soon as the door closed.

When I got to her last layer of clothes, I had two surprises: she was wearing beautiful backless panties and a jewel plug in her ass (yum), and there was an unmistakable bulge on the front of her panties – a small bulge, yet one which shape was very obvious… I had previously never slept with a Tgirl and it wasn’t something I was particularly seeking, but I’m open-minded, I loved absolutely everything else about her, and I hadn’t been planning to do anything with her crotch anyway – my attention was focused on everything else, particularly her beautiful ass and its beautiful hole…

We had a very intense and wild night, so good in fact that we spent the next day together. Two months later, she was selling her apartment and moving to my place. Four years later, here we are, still a couple, and enjoying the Hell out of it.

During all this time, you have to understand we never, ever talked about what she used to be. All her appearance, behaviour, friends, etc. indicate she’s always been a woman. Even her parents (who love me, I have the “ideal son-in-law” type) never mentioned it, all the pictures they keep of her show a cute girl. In our everyday lives, she always wears something that hides her crotch – she has a very large assortment of backless panties to wear during sex (and jewel plugs to go with it). She never touches her crotch during sex, and I certainly don’t. The only thing that may happen is that she cums in her panties without any stimulation while I fuck her (sometimes she cums even while deepthroating me), and that rather turns me on (it has no consequence, I can keep fucking her as long and as hard as I want after she cums, and I generally do just that).

So, it’s been quite a shock when she talked about her past for the first time last night. She’s been brooding lately, which is unusual for her, so I asked her if everything was OK. She answered that when she started her transition (!) years ago, she swore to herself she would be a complete woman at 30yo. Now, she was 29yo, the only missing thing was to turn her genitals into a pussy (from what I understand, her balls stopped producing hormones years ago), but she wasn’t sure she wanted to get a pussy any more: I’m anal only, she’s always been anal only/ignoring her genitals (and loved it that way), and she didn’t feel like going through a long and painful and risky surgical procedure to get something we wouldn’t use anyway. But on the other hand, she did promise to turn into a “complete woman” by 30yo, and she still wanted to be one, so she didn’t know what to do.

And then, she asked me what I felt about it. I told her it was a very complex matter, and I needed some time to phrase my feelings correctly.

To you, I’ll say what I feel very bluntly: the idea that she gets her cock and balls removed pleases and turns me on a lot (much more than I thought it would), but I’d rather have her keep those if her alternative is to get a vagina and clitoris instead.

The thing that makes our sex so perfect is how obvious it is: from the very start of her sexuality, she ignored her genitals and focused on her ass, she’s completely disinhibited about it (for example, from day one she does ass to mouth like it’s the most natural thing in the world, it doesn’t even feel naughty). That makes her ideal for my own sexuality – there’s only one hole to fuck down there, nothing on her front to act as distraction, no orgasm but anal orgasms, we complete each other totally. Her getting a vagina and clitoris would ruin that balance: either she doesn’t use them and what’s the point, or she does, and it breaks what she’s always been and what we are.

I’d rather have her keep her boy genitals, which are so much smaller than mine that it actually arouses me. I thought a lot about it, and ideally, it’d probably be the best for her to get a “fake pussy”: no vagina hole, no clitoris, but no cock or balls either, just a stylized pussy shape that’d be a lot simpler and safer to build surgically. That way, she’d be at ease in a bathing suit/if she has to take a shower naked in front of people, and she could feel more like a “complete woman” (which, frankly, she already is to me), but without breaking our balance. I would love that very much. But I don’t know if it’s legal/where to get that safely, and how she’d react to my suggestion.

And another thing: do I have the right to tell her how I feel? It’s not my body. I’m just her boyfriend, and we only know each other for four years. Who am I to decide?

Everything I read from you make me feel we have similar views on things, I think you can understand me, and I really could use your opinion. Thanks!

Ultimately, it’s her body and she has the right to do what she wants with it, but she’s also asking your opinion. I think you should be honest with her, but preface your thoughts by saying that most of all you want her to do what she wants for herself. Tell her that you love that she is anal only and that she doesn’t have anything else to get distracted by. Tell her that you think she’s wonderful the way she is, but that if were to change, you still would want to stay anal only with her. You could even tell her about the idea of a decorative but nonfunctional vulva as a compromise, and see what she thinks about it. If she likes the idea, then she could start talking to surgeons who perform such procedures and see whether it’s an option.

Be honest, be open, and be supportive of her. Try to just have a good, healthy conversation about it together and listen to each other. Good luck, and let us know where you end up.

Reddit: How to Make Women More Confident About Their Assholes?

When I’ve asked women to spread, it can almost feel invasive. At least the first few times. It’s not like in porn where a woman moans then spreads her asshole out super wide and says “stick it in my shithole, baby”. No, it’s much more intimate than that. Especially for her.

I want my woman to feel like she’s giving me the holy grail of sex. I want her to act out with the confidence of seeing it as the ultimate compliment to her physical form. Her femininity should not feel under threat.

In conclusion, I want her to feel like her assholes worth a million bucks when we fuck!

One of several good responses:

Positive reinforcement is commonly one of the best ways to go. When you have anal, be sure to compliment her on all the things you love about her ass/asshole. Tell her how sexy it looks or how pretty/cute her asshole is, how good it feels to you, how much you appreciate using her ass. Don’t beat the horse about it, but do it enough times that the continued positivity will eventually make her feel more confident with it. She may not ever feel exactly how you feel about it, but her feeling more confident and at ease with it will certainly help a good deal in general.

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit

Forum: Long-Time Anal-Only Girl

So, here I am…. I have been lurking on both the blog version and the forum itself and I was surprised and happy to see that there is an anal only lifestyle community and blog and it’s great that there are people that want to engage in anal only lifestyle. I don’t know if it’s appropriate to tell you guys what age I am during the time I got into anal, but I have heard of sodomy before and the idea of sodomy turned me on. I wasn’t anal only during that time, I don’t know why until I stumble up the anal only lifestyle blog last 2 years and that’s when I decide to identify as anal only as a personal choice of my own. Since sodomy is the only kind of sex I engage in (even if I don’t have a partner), I feel like anal makes me more happy and confident in my own sexuality. Not to mention that I never play with my pussy because it’s kinda weird and vagina exists for making children, and also I would say I’m a vaginal virgin and I’m glad I have never put something in my pussy because it’ll hurt. Every time I hear vaginal sex-related stuffs or whatever it is, I get sex-repulsed for weird reasons and I don’t know why, but that’s how my body react as well as my brain. But when it comes to anal, I always get horny and sexually aroused by it, even fantasizing about getting fucked in the ass makes me more sexually aroused and frustrated.

Continue reading on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

The Value of Anal Positivity

Talk to many women about anal sex, and if they aren’t already a fan, chances are that many have a lot of negative ideas about it. These ideas may come out of past attempts with inexperienced partners, stories from friends, or just various myths that spread through popular culture and the media.

But the reality is that some of the biggest enthusiasts of anal sex are women, because the potential for amazing pleasure can benefit women the most, and this highlights an essential path for encouraging anal to more people.

Those of us who love anal and know better than to believe negative myths and ideas about it should counter that negativity by being openly positive about anal and our love for it when it comes up in conversation. Instead of ignoring people when they say something negative, we should speak up and share our own opinions and experiences that are in direct contrast with that negativity.

Most people prefer positivity and want to like things, but it’s easy to get dragged down by negativity. When all a woman hears from her friends is jokes and mockery about anal sex, the chances of her wanting to try it is pretty minimal, but when she hears a friend share how it’s her favorite way to have sex and gives her the best orgasms she’s ever had, she’s probably going to want to try too, and it can start a dialogue about proper technique and how to begin.

So, the next time you hear someone say something negative about anal, be prepared to calmly and respectfully respond with your own positive opinions about it.

Forum: New to Forum but Anal Only for Years

I’ve been reading this site for years, it was one of the places my now-husband showed me to help learn about everything on my own a bit when we first met and he was getting me into all this. Now we’re married and always been anal only together (we do clit stim tho), meaning I too have always been anal only as he was my first ‘boyfriend’. Now I even have some piercing to help enforce our anal only lifestyle/vaginal denial. Mostly decided to finally join because I’ve been bored out of my skull (spring 2020!) and have also recently found that I can be marginally helpful and interesting about AOL

Continue reading on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Reddit: Questions About Anal

1. Do you get poop on your partner?

2. Do you develop anal incontinence?

3. Long lasting issues from too much anal sex?

To which another Reddit user responds:

More anal enthusiast than anal only, but I’ll take a stab at these:

1. Do you get poop on your partner? Not on purpose (unless he’s into that 😏), but no matter how well you clean out, accidents will occasionally happen. Like everything else related to sex, communication is key, and knowing the limits of your body is a necessity. Good diet and establishing a bathroom and cleaning routine can help immensely.

2. Do you develop anal incontinence? Absolutely not. The anal sphincter is a muscle, and much like any other muscle in the body, it gets stronger with use, not weaker. I have learned what it feels like to relax my bowels, so I can warm up faster and worry far less about pain (initially, anal would hurt if I didn’t take time to warm up with plugs and toys but I can take a dick with no prep now), but I’ve never lost control of my bowels while not having sex.

3. Long lasting issues from too much anal sex? Only if you consider orgasms to be a bad thing 🙃. Anal feels great, makes me cum faster (and harder), keeps sex interesting, and somehow remains taboo (ass to mouth still makes me feel like a filthy whore). I love it!

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit

Message: You Can Definitely Learn to Love Anal

Anonymous: I read the post last week that criticized you for encouraging women to learn to love anal and keep practicing if they don’t enjoy it. I think that was really unfair, because women can definitely learn to love anal. I know because I’m a woman who started out in her same position and hated anything to do with my ass but my husband when we were dating in college really wanted to do anal with me and we talked about it and I agreed to try because I loved and trusted him and he started slowly and gently and showed me that I could actually feel really good with something in my ass and over a few months got me to where I begged him to fuck my ass. We’re still together and six years later we’re in an anal only marriage.

Was it hard at first? Sometimes, yes, but because he helped me to see the appeal and made me want it, I was willing to put in the effort to first try what he wanted, and then start to want it myself. But if you don’t want it, you won’t put in that effort and you’ll resist and resent what he wants to try, and that leads to never enjoying it.

Thanks for sharing, and you’re exactly right. I think anyone can learn to love anal, but they have to want to learn it. And if they’re coming into it from a position of being pressured or resenting their partner for making them do something they don’t want to, chances are they won’t enjoy it.

But if you like the idea and want to learn how to do it right, that will go a long way towards making you love a cock up your ass.

Your Messages Are Welcomed

As a reminder to our readers, we always welcome your messages, questions, stories, and more. If you have anything that you would like to share or ask on this blog, please send us a message!

It doesn’t matter if it’s been asked before, or if you think your story isn’t interesting—we, and our readers, love hearing from you and want everyone to feel comfortable reaching out and sharing. It helps build this community, and encourages more people to step out of the shadows and share their own stories. And the more people there are openly talking about their love for anal only, the more it inspires others to feel comfortable trying it for themselves.

So don’t hesitate to contact us and share your anal only experiences, goals, dreams, questions or concerns.

Message: Anal Only Dating

Jim: Can you give an article on dating and how to approach those who you don’t know if they would be receptive to anal only or not?

Ah, the eternal question: how do I meet someone who shares the same sexual desires as me without scaring off people who might be into it but aren’t comfortable enough with me yet to say so?

This is actually the topic of a chapter in our Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle, entitled Dating & Finding New Partners in the Anal Only Lifestyle.

Reddit: Is It True That Mature Women Do More Anal?

I read a post from a redditor here saying he left his 22YO girlfriend for a woman 11 years older in hopes of having anal. When I’m having some girl-talk with my work mates, it is usually the older ladies who do anal sex (or at least admit it) specially the married ones. I never met a married woman who hasn’t had anal sex now that I think about it ( at least the ones that I know of).

And whenever I tried to talk about it with my friends, or when I was in school/college. They either were against doing anal, or very few said they did it.

Is it just my experience or is it really like this?

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit