The Key to Painless Anal

A common concern by those getting started with anal sex is that it’s going to hurt. Whether you’ve had a bad experience before, have heard from friends about bad experiences they had, or used to enjoy anal but are now having trouble with pain, this advice will help you enjoy the pure pleasure of anal that you deserveā€”without pain!

Anal Should Never Hurt

First, let’s get this point across: if anal hurts, that’s a good sign that something is wrong. You aren’t warmed up enough. You aren’t using enough lube. You’re going too fast, too deep, or too big too soon. You should stop and reassess things immediately to avoid injuring yourself.

Start Small and Slow

If you’re new to anal, you can’t just start having anal sex, you need to start small and work your way up over time to the size, depth and speed of anal sex. For more information on this process, see our guide to anal training.

But even if you’re more experienced with it, and you’ve had anal sex quite a lot, you might find it hurting if it’s been a little while when you go to put it in. If you don’t take the time to warm up first and jump right to a bigger toy or a penis, and it hurts, that can tell you that you need to slow down and do a little more preparation first. Do some rimming and fingering. Put in a small butt plug and play another way for a bit. Use a smaller dildo. Once you feel relaxed and comfortable and things are not hurting, try it again.

Even someone who is very experienced can benefit from doing this if it’s been a while and they’ve tightened back up. It will take less time to get back into things, but you may want to take a day or two to transition back up to the sizes you’re used to if you haven’t been playing for a few weeks. It can be easy to think that you’ve mastered everything and don’t need any small toys anymore, and when you try to go to put in your favorite toy after some time off, you can be surprised by a sudden sharp pain. Take the relatively small amount of time to do some gentle anal massage and warmup to relax and open up first and avoid that setback.

Take the Time to Heal

If you end up with a small tear, bleeding, or other injury in association with pain, make sure you take a few days to heal before trying again. Anal injuries can heal well, but if you continue to irritate them they can take much longer to heal or even become chronic. Larger injuries can develop into scar tissue that remains painful or tears more easily in the future, so it’s really important to be patient with your body and take the steps needed to not injure yourself.

Perform proper after care, use aloe vera or lotion around your anus to help it heal, and your ass will repay you with a lifetime of pleasure and wonderful anal sex.

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