Message: Nervous to Have Anal Sex

Anonymous: Hey there, I’m nervous to have anal sex with my boyfriend but we both really want to. I have read everything on how to take it slow and how to make it feel better, but I have an awkward question. Does it stretch out the anus? Or will it go back to normal?

It will absolutely go back to normal. The anus is a muscle (or a set of muscles) and just like you can stretch your other muscles (e.g. before exercise), you can stretch your anal muscles, but that doesn’t make them function less or change the fact that the default state of anal muscles is tight and closed. It’s more that you increase their range of flexibility and, over time, conscious control.

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