Message: Wife Enjoys Anal But Won’t Admit It

Anonymous: I’m very lucky to enjoy anal with my wife. I would love only anal sex. It feels to me like a very natural thing to do, both physically and mentally. It is frustrating that my wife also clearly likes it as part of our repertoire but won’t ever admit it. I have even put it to her that we should have a trial period without vaginal, but so far without success 🙁 However, I will continue to follow your excellent blog!

Is she refusing to admit that she likes anal at all? Does she say she dislikes it, or just that she doesn’t want it exclusively? If she does enjoy it, I’d just say to spend a lot of effort making sure she gets a lot of pleasure during anal penetration as well as stimulating her anally during vaginal sometimes, both externally and (if she’s okay with it) internally. If she’d be into it, get her a butt plug to wear during other sex acts.

For someone not fully open to the idea of anal exclusivity, you have to start very small, e.g. only several days without vaginal for a while when starting off, then if that’s a success, a bit longer after several short sessions, etc.

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