The 11 Biggest Misconceptions About Anal Sex

Cosmo continues to work to shed its past image of bad sex tips with a well-written article debunking myths about anal sex. Check out some excerpts below.

Anal sex has an unfairly bad reputation. In this, the unofficial Era Of Ass, anal sex deserves a rebrand as the totally fine, very safe thing that it is. It’s time to shed the taboos and bust the myths.

THE MYTH: YOU CAN JUMP RIGHT IN.

The truth: Mm, not quite. Your rectum isn’t as pliable as your vagina, and also unlike the vagina, it’s not self-lubricating. Vanderlinde strongly advises taking your time if you’re just starting out, and working your way up using smaller things like fingers and thin toys. “Sometimes it takes a few different encounters,” Vanderlinde says. Patience!

THE MYTH: IT WILL HURT.

The truth: Anal sex doesn’t have to hurt. It’s often just done incorrectly. Many women find it incredibly pleasurable, and some even report having orgasms with them. If you and your partner start slow, work your way into insertion with smaller implements like fingers and sex toys and use plenty of lube, pain will be the last thing on your mind.

THE MYTH: ONCE IT HURTS, IT WILL ALWAYS HURT.

The truth: So you tried it once and insertion hurt really bad. You made your partner stop and vowed never to go “back” there again. You don’t have to shut the backdoor because of one or two negative experiences. Most of these experiences have to do with not following the above instructions: Go slow, graduate in size and use lube. Plus there is a nice trick to get you relaxed. If you also stimulate your clitoris at the same time it can encourage the pleasure over pain response.

THE MYTH: ONLY “SLUTS” HAVE ANAL SEX.

The truth: You’ve always heard that bad girls are the only ones willing to have anal sex. In actuality, anal sex was once voted the number one taboo sexual behavior that heterosexual couples want to try. So obviously, we all can’t be sluts. There’s a natural curiosity about our bodies and if there is pleasure to be had, you should feel you can explore that in a safe and healthy way.

The following one, however, isn’t perhaps as much of a myth as they suggest, given this community. It’s certainly not something that’s universally true, but it’s definitely the case that a lot of men lose a lot of interest in vaginal after experiencing good anal, but until recently many of those men haven’t admitted that very openly. So they hedge somewhat in their answer, and end up staying too conservative here.

THE MYTH: ONCE YOU GIVE YOUR PARTNER ANAL SEX, IT WILL BE ALL HE WANTS.

The truth: It’s no secret, many men do cop to the fact that they enjoy the additional tightness the anus affords as compared to the vagina. But most men don’t want to give up the main entry either. Vaginas are still revered. Anal sex tends to be a “treat” mixed into your regular sexual repertoire of play.

Better to tell the truth and admit that yes, many men will prefer anal sex and it doesn’t need to stay just a “treat”, but can become the main element of your sex life if you both enjoy it and want it to.

Read the full article at Cosmo

The original version of this post on Tumblr received the following response.

alwaysanalblog: Agreed on that last one. There will always be exceptions, but for the most part experience of anal will change your views of sex forever. Most men, understandably, won’t want to go back to what they now can see to be inferior.

This is a case of Cosmo playing it safe, trying to to scare the readers but assuring them their vagina’s are still “special”. The truth would be hard to swallow and be counter productive. So while it’s not really true, I think Cosmo made a wise choice to downplay this.

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