Every couple of years — whisper it — anal sex comes back. Trends. Then it goes away, not in practice but as part of the public conversation.

While researching my book I observed the act’s fluctuations. In the course of that decade and among the heterosexual people I interviewed, anal sex went from being a whispered desire or fear to carrying with it a unique shame that surprised me. Interestingly, that shame was levied against the women who didn’t want to do it.

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