How to Achieve an Anal Orgasm

This is just one part of our Anal Sex Advice & Guide to the Anal Only Lifestyle section. Be sure to read the rest as well to get answers to our most frequently asked questions! New! This guide is also now available as a Kindle ebook!

For many people, the anal orgasm is the holy grail of anal sex, a sign of being able to derive all the pleasure one could want directly from anal sex, without any vaginal or clitoral stimulation (or penile stimulation). While there’s nothing wrong with clitoral stimulation if it’s what works best for you, some find it distracting or a hassle to need to do during sex in order to orgasm and would rather be able to orgasm simply from anal penetration. In addition, anal orgasms can be even more intense than any other kind for some people, and there can be other advantages to excluding clitoral stimulation and focusing only on anal orgasms for those who suffer loss of arousal, depression or other negative effects post-orgasm.

While there isn’t any objective, scientific data about this, unfortunately, anecdotally it seems that more women are able to orgasm from anal sex without any other stimulation than from vaginal sex, and so women who are unable to otherwise achieve penetrative orgasm can often do so through anal sex. If you struggle with orgasm during vaginal, anal sex and anal orgasms may be a viable alternative for you.

Everyone can be different when it comes to anal orgasms

Some people are blessed with the ability to orgasm easily and quickly from anal sex within the first few times they have anal sex, while others need to learn how to achieve it. Still others may not be able to orgasm from anal and need to couple anal with clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm, but this can be hard to determine in the short term, because it can take an extended period of time for some people to learn to achieve an anal orgasm.

Benefits of anal orgasms

Clitoral orgasms are widely enjoyed by most women, but some really don’t enjoy them or dislike the negative effects that some experience post-orgasm, including a loss of arousal resulting in disinterest in sex afterwards, feelings of guilt or depression, etc. These effects can lead some women to be interested in edging and orgasm denial, and anal orgasm can be a way of enjoying some of the same benefits without giving up orgasms altogether.

For most people, anal only orgasms don’t have these same effects (though again, everyone is different!) and people are able to achieve great orgasmic pleasure without the loss of arousal post-orgasm.

There are multiple approaches to achieving an anal orgasm

Again, because everyone is different, there are a variety of different techniques you can use to try and achieve an orgasm, and some may have success with some while others need to try something else.

In general, as with any situation where someone is trying to learn how to have an orgasm with any form of stimulation, it’s key to not force it or try too hard or get too frustrated with it if something isn’t working. Because a lot of what triggers an orgasm is mental and emotional, being in the wrong headspace can interfere with the physical stimulation and keep it from happening. You can work towards the goal of having an orgasm without having it on your mind all the time.

The gradual tapering off of clitoral stimulation approach to anal orgasm

This is probably the easiest to get into, because it doesn’t eliminate clitoral stimulation all at once, and doesn’t abruptly end all orgasms for you up front.

Start by having anal sex with as little clitoral stimulation as you can, but if you feel the need to touch yourself clitorally at any point, feel free to do so. You’re not trying to stick to a strict restriction here, just minimize your dependence on it and allowing the anal stimulation to take the priority most of the time. If you’re unable to enjoy comfortable or pain-free anal sex without clitoral stimulation, you should probably focus on more anal training, warmup, and being able to better relax during anal sex before this.

If you feel an orgasm building, try to only lightly touch your clit as little as needed to get you closer and closer to the edge, and then over it into an orgasm. Then, the next time, see if you can rely on it just a little bit less, until you can build that orgasm up towards the edge without your clit at all, reducing a little bit of stimulation at a time.

As you get to the point where you can almost get over the edge but still need your clit to actually orgasm, some will find they hit a wall and can’t figure out how to eliminate that last little bit of clit stimulation. Others can continue to reduce it gradually, including using their clit to start moving right to the edge and then using anal stimulation to get themselves over the edge. If you struggle getting to a pure anal orgasm from here, however, it might be time for the next approach.

The total clitoral denial approach to anal orgasm

Whether you’re transitioning into this from the previous approach or just want to jump straight in to pure anal orgasms with no more clitoral stimulation, this strict approach can work for some people better than others.

The basic premise is that clitoral orgasms are easy and your body gets used to them and their ease, and they in-effect short-circuit any other orgasms you might be able to have through less-explored means, getting in the way of your efforts to orgasm from just anal. By eliminating clitoral stimulation altogether, your arousal builds up and needs an outlet, and your body can start to consider other options a bit more easily. Because you want to build up your arousal for this technique to work best, accept that you might not orgasm every time you have sex to begin with, and go into this with the mindset that you’re going to enjoy the sex for what it is even if you don’t always orgasm.

If you get too frustrated without an orgasm after a period time, you can always feel free to revert to the previous technique and use the minimal amount of clitoral stimulation needed to get over the edge for a bit of a reset. Don’t let this feel like a failure, it can be a normal part of the process for some people. As your arousal returns, go back to clit denial again and see if you can go longer this time and get closer to an anal only orgasm. Repeat the process as needed until you can orgasm.

Other tips and techniques for anal orgasm

One technique that has helped some people be able to orgasm from anal is to try masturbating or having sex with a full bladder, which can increase your sensitivity as well as reposition things internally to better trigger anal orgasms from penetration.

Numbing creams like Orajel can be applied to the clit in small quantities in order to temporarily remove sensation and temptation to touch it during anal orgasm training sessions if you’re finding it hard to resist.

Some find they don’t want orgasms at all

While this may not apply to most people, and it certainly doesn’t need to be where you end up, some people find during the course of trying to achieve anal orgasms that they actually like the increased arousal and sexual frustration and constant need for sex that can come from not orgasming or having clitoral stimulation anymore, and enjoy that feeling more than they enjoy the short burst of pleasure from an orgasm, especially if that orgasm resets their arousal afterwards. Few go into this expecting to end up there, but long-term or permanent orgasm denial can really start to appeal to certain people after experimenting with it enough, especially if they find they aren’t able to orgasm from anal sex after extensive trying, but want to be strictly anal only and not use any clitoral stimulation.

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