Category: Clitoral Denial

This category contains posts talking about clitoral denial, whether advice and reasons for introducing it into one’s sexual routine, stories and accounts of having done so, and questions about why one’s partner may want them to give up their clit. For more information, see our Benefits of Avoiding Clitoral Stimulation During Anal Sex page.

For those interested in denial, you may also want to visit the website Edging Space (formerly female-orgasm-denial on Tumblr).

Forum: Anal Without Clit Stimulation

As part of an ongoing discussion on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum about anal sex and the anal only lifestyle with the exclusion of clitoral stimulation, this excellent post was made:

How does one truly know they need clit stimulation to orgasm without truly trying to have one anal only? Just as many women have vaginal sex many times before they learn how to orgasm, the same holds true for anal. As well, if the woman has a hang-up about eliminating clitoral stimulation, the likelihood she will orgasm from anal only is low. She has to go into it willingly. 

As many of you know, my wife and I have been anal only for many years now. For a long time our anal only to anal with clit stimulation was about 60/40, then 50/50. Then, about the first of the year, she began using her Hitachi Magic Wand and it seemed like she wanted to use clit stimulation every time we had sex. I talked to her about anal only April and asked if she would be open to doing anal only, without clit stimulation, all month. I made it clear that, if she didn’t think she could do it with an open mind, we should not try it. She seemed a little skeptical, but agreed she would try to do it. I was confused by her skepticism, as it had only been a few months since she had orgasms from anal only.

The first half of the first week of April she was still on her period, when she usually only gets off about once anyway. She wasn’t able to get off. As a side note, we are trying to have anal sex every day this year (more about that coming in another post). For about another week she wasn’t able to get off either and seemed to be a little frustrated. I told her she could use her wand, but she was determined to not to. It seemed like that did it. She was able to have a small orgasm that night. The next night she built up to it a little more and was able to have a little better orgasm, but still seemed disappointed. The following night, we were both tired and did a quickie just to keep up with our daily commitment. The same was true for the next morning (she rarely gets off in the morning anyway). 

The next night, I entered her and just remained buried to the hilt in her ass. After a few minutes, she began to grind back on me. I could tell she was much more into it this time. Rather than the quick orgasm brought on by anal with clit stimulation, this orgasm plateaued, as her anal only orgasms had in the past. She maintained this blissful state for about five minutes, then gradually came down. She admitted she had forgot how good her anal only orgasms were. Later that night, i rolled over so I was spooning her and she began to push her ass back toward me. I quickly lubed my cock and pushed inside her as she pushed back against me. Again, i just held my cock buried in her ass as she rhythmically worked her muscles so that they almost sucked my cock. Again her orgasm built to a plateau on the edge of release, where she remained for nearly 10 minutes. Through raspy breathes I could hear her saying, “Oh god, oh god, oh god,” as i felt her ass begin to pulse and engulf me ever deeper. It was then she let out a muffled scream as she began to cum, causing me to release my second load of the night deep within her. Unlike a clitoral orgasm, she didn’t immediately come down. My cock remained in her ass, softening as we both drifted off to sleep again.

The next morning I hit the snooze button several times before we got up, causing us to forgo our (more often than not) morning session. We kept shooting each other the kind of looks only lovers do over breakfast. As I left for work, she gave me a passionate kiss and said she hoped we could repeat the previous night’s performance. That night it was much the same, but her plateau lasted a little longer. Once again, she had an intense orgasm, but it slowly subsided, unlike those she has with clitoral stimulation. 

The next morning, we did our usual routine, we both go to the bathroom, then return to bed to snuggle and have sex. Although my wife usually enjoys the closeness of sex in the morning, she rarely gets off. But this time it was different. She asked me to lay still inside her. Once again, I felt her begin working her ass on my cock. And, once again, she experienced a plateau on the edge or orgasm that lasted a number of minutes. Then release, followed by a gentle letdown. 

It’s been nearly a week since then and she has managed to orgasm at least once every single day. It seems like her libido remains much higher, almost as though the clitoral stimulation was keeping her from orgasming more often before. My wife has admitted she has really enjoyed the last week and a half and wants to go all month without clitoral stimulation, but says she doesn’t know about giving up clitoral stimulation. She says it takes her too long to get off with anal only and sometimes just needs a quick release. 

I’m curious to see how the rest of the month goes, and how she’ll do if/or when she decides she wants to reincorporate clitoral stimulation.

LuvMyWifesAss, Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Read the entire conversation at the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Message: Girls Should Stay Vaginal Virgins

Anonymous: I totally agree with your encouragement for girls to keep their vaginas virgin and to start with anal and only ever do sex that way. I’m in my 30s and I only did anal until my early 20s before I decided to start using my pussy too, basically out of laziness, in order to be easier to date and fuck guys. I never really enjoyed it, and spent a few years kind of miserable and unsatisfied as the guys I dated spent all their time there and barely paid attention to my ass.

After I got out of a long vaginal only relationship where I was really hating myself for what I’d become, I took some time for myself and got back into playing with my ass, wearing butt plugs and riding dildos anally almost every day. I really loved it, and it wasn’t until this time that I was really conscious about what an important role anal and being anal only played for me. I followed one of your anal only challenges and only masturbated anally—not even my clit, as I’ve always been able to orgasm anally and I thought stopping all use of my pussy and clit would be the best way to refocus my sex life back where it belongs—for an entire month, and I’ve just kept going since. I started dating again and was much more selective, making it clear that I’m only interested in anal. I had some good hookups with guys who were okay with skipping my pussy and going straight for my ass.

And now I’m a few months into a new relationship with a guy who loves anal almost as much as I do. Things are going great, and we’re both really happy with being anal only. But I really wish I hadn’t spent so many years wasting my life on vaginal and my biggest regret is that I didn’t stay a vaginal virgin. So if you’re a vaginal virgin right now who is interested in or practicing the anal only lifestyle, listen to the advice and stay that way. You’ll never regret being an anal only vaginal virgin, but you will regret giving up your vaginal virginity.

Thank you for sharing, and well said! As I’ve commented before, you can only give up your vaginal virginity once, so if you have hesitations about doing so, don’t do it. If you do, it’s not the biggest deal in the world, and you can (and likely will, as you’ve discovered) end up back in the anal only lifestyle eventually because vaginal will never compare to the pleasures and benefits of being purely anal only, but there’s something special about choosing to keep your vagina completely unused and focusing purely on anal pleasure and sex, so if that’s still an option for you—take it!

Message: I Hate My Vagina

Anonymous: I love love love your blog and loved your blogs on Tumblr when you were there. I’m 28, and a vaginal virgin by choice since I was 16 when I first had sex. I have never liked my vagina or vaginal sex, and always been turned off by it and wished I didn’t even have it. I’ve always played with my ass, and barely even tried playing with my cunt after I did it a few times and hated everything about it. It just feels gross and wrong to me and turns me off immediately.

So instead I’ve been putting things up my ass as long as I can remember and having anal sex only for the last 12 years and I plan to never have vaginal sex. The idea of being anal only forever and keep my cunt totally unused and untouched makes me really happy and so that’s my goal. I love everything about anal and nothing about vaginal. I do it all—ass to mouth, permanent clit denial for the last decade, even double anal I love! I’m engaged to a wonderful man who I have amazing anal sex with almost every day and who feels the same way and wants to keep me a vaginal virgin too.

My only hesitation at all is that we want to have children, and while it makes sense that vaginal sex is for getting pregnant and anal sex is for everything else, I just don’t ever want to get fucked in my cunt even for that. I read that some people have been able to get pregnant without having vaginal sex, can you give us some advice on that? I hope to get pregnant but never have to get fucked any way but in my ass. Thank you!

You sound like a wonderful woman and your fiance is a lucky man. Everything you described about yourself is exactly what I would consider an ideal partner in every way.

As for getting pregnant without having vaginal sex, that’s a topic of growing interest among anal only women, and there are multiple women in the anal only community who have success with that goal.

Some have gone to a fertility clinic and undergone in-vitro fertilization treatments in order to achieve that goal. This is a very successful way to go, but also expensive.

Some will have anal sex like normal and then pull out and spread open her vagina to ejaculate inside without penetrating. The use of a speculum or other tool to help hold it open can aid with this, as can certain medical lubricants in the vagina to help his semen penetrate more deeply quickly.

My personal preference is a variation of the above, where anal sex is done normally in a doggy style position but he ejaculates inside and then spreads open your vagina while you push out his semen and it runs down into your vagina. Potentially paired with the above lubricant technique, this can be very effective and is a pure anal technique that involves anal sex to completion. It can take repeat attempts over several months to be successful, but that just means more anal sex to enjoy!

Good luck to the both of you.

Message: Anal Only Surprise

BillW: I didn’t post earlier as I didn’t know how this was going to go, but I wanted to share our Anal Only April story now that the month is over.

My wife and I have done anal once or twice a month since we started dating and she always enjoyed it but for whatever reason we just never did it more often. I’ve started wanting it more but didn’t know how to bring it up. I guess I was worried she would see it as some sort of rejection of her vagina or of her as a woman if I said I wanted to do anal more instead.

When I saw your Anal Only April post, I thought this sounded like a good way to introduce it, as a fun challenge and something relatively short-term at first. Just something new to try, you know? So I told her about it and asked if she’d be interested. She said she’d think about it, but by the end of the day when I got home from work she had her butt plug in and she told me she wanted me in her ass, and as I was sliding inside her, she said I could do her in the ass every day for all of April.

Obviously, I was very excited and we fucked hard and fast and I came deep inside her ass more than once that night, and every night for the month. The more we did it, the easier it got, and within a week she was able to go straight to anal without any warmup. She’d always been able to orgasm from anal, but it didn’t happen every time or come easily for her some of the time. A few weeks in, though, she was cumming multiple times nearly every time we had sex without even touching her pussy. It was like an anal awakening for her, and we were both loving it.

Last week, she told me that if she’d known having anal more often would be like this, she would have wanted to start doing this years ago. I told her that I had always loved her ass and had wanted to do more anal with her for a while but hadn’t known how to say it. She called me silly and said I should have just told her and she would have done it. So let that be a lesson and talk to your partner about what you want!

Now that the month is over, we’ve talked about what we want to do from here. I know you encourage sticking with anal only if it went well for the month and everyone enjoyed it, and we talked about if we wanted to stay anal only or go back to using her pussy some of the time. When I asked her what she thought, she answered immediately that she didn’t miss vaginal sex at all but if she stopped doing anal she would definitely miss that, and said that she thought that said everything for her.

So we’re not going back to vaginal, and I guess we’re anal only from now on. I’m really excited, and so is she! Thank you for the inspiration and helping us get to this point.

Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience, and congratulations to the both of you. You won’t miss vaginal or regret going anal only, and I have no doubt you’ll never look back if you both had such a strong shift and positive experience from this month of anal only.

If she’s continuing to have pure anal orgasms so easily, I’d encourage committing to excluding clit stimulation entirely if she hasn’t already. Once anal only orgasms start to become easier, clit stimulation just gets in the way of better orgasms and is no longer necessary. Going entirely without it long-term will further develop and amplify the anal orgasms.

Forum: 25 Year Old Anal Only Vaginal Virgin

New member Marie on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum shares her story:

My name is Marie, I’m 25 yrs old vaginal virgin. I’m married for 5 years, but I have the same partner for 9 yrs. 

I started my sexual life from anal at my 16 birthday and we still continue that kind of sex. My husband is older from me, he is 31 now. He is experienced in vaginal sex, but he told me he is not interested in that kind of sex anymore. I have accepted this, because I was very young and I was afraid of getting pregnant. I can cum hard from anal only, it’s not necessary to caress my clit. Initially, I thought he will take my vaginal virginity later, but we are couple for 9 years and he won’t do that, my pussy doesn’t exists for him. I admit that I don’t want do vaginal sex too, but we want to have kids in future…

Upon being asked for additional details, she added:

My boyfriend introduced me into anal, but I heard about that kind of sex, I had many talks about with my friends and parents, about anal sex too. My mom told me many good things about anal (more pleasure for both, no way to get pregnant, no condoms, no pills). She is very active with anal. She told me, it’s not okay to force my boyfriend to use condoms, if he won’t use them. 

My boyfriend told me, that vaginal sex will be painful on the beginning, it’s risky (pregnancy) so we will be stressed every month waiting for my period (he does not accept condoms and pills). He told that vaginal sex is not very pleasant for him and he doesn’t want to do that, and that anal sex is best for us and asked if I accept that. I told “yes” immediately 

My first anal was nice. No pain, no bad surprises, but no orgasm too. I had to learn how to earn pleasure for that, but every next intercourse was better. I had my first anal orgasm after two months. I cum fastest on standing position, from behind

I had a few reasons to try anal before vaginal: 
– I heard many good thing about anal
– I heard many bad things about vaginal
– I was afraid about pregnancy
– my boyfriend doesn’t want to use condoms and he loves to cum inside me
– he is not interested into vaginal sex at all. I’m young and my pussy is tight for sure, but he doesn’t want. No pussy, anal only.

Anal sex is just better. If I can reach strong orgasm from “second” hole, without risk, with more pleasure for him, why should I use my pussy? I don’t see any reason and sense. After my first sex I told my mom about our choice. She smiled and praised me for this responsible decision. 

I told my gyno about that and she see no contraindication to continue beeing AO.

Continue reading on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Discussion: I (30f) am anal-only with my (30m) Dom. AMA!

A reddit user posts an AMA about her anal only relationship:

I do still get to have pleasure from my greedy clit. He allows this because He wanted me to learn to have pleasure in anal activities, which I do now. I have anal orgasms and they are amazing. I wish that I could be able to say I am truly 100% anal-only meaning no clit action at all. I’ll get there some day!

Continue reading on reddit

Message: Communication is Key!

CS: My wife of 5.5 years is pregnant with our second child, something we agreed to. Prior to actually trying for a baby, we were doing anal nearly every time we had sex; vaginal served almost as foreplay for it. In the last year, I had mentioned “Maybe one time you’ll be so into it, you’ll suck my cock after.” “Is that what you want?” she asked. And now ass-to-mouth is something we do regularly, provided everything is clean.

As for the pregnancy, I had mentioned that I found this blog… and as we got into the topic more, she admitted that, aside from wanting a baby, she doesn’t even like vaginal sex that much. The thought that she strongly prefers it in the ass for more than just my desire sent me reeling. She also mentioned that when we’re able to get back into our active sex life, she’d be willing to practice getting off more regularly without clitoral play.

For anyone wanting to try new things, be it anal or not, just talk about it! It’s all about trust in your partner that makes it so passionate and exciting.

Congratulations to the both of you! Communication absolutely is key, and if more couples communicated about such things, many would find that they strongly shared a preference for anal, or that the other would at least be very willing to try an anal focus for their partner.

You’ve both got something to look forward to now as you shift to anal only when returning to an active sex life, and it’s going to be so much fun and so satisfying as you do so.

Forum: 7 Months and Counting

User Hitman1386 on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum shares an update on his anal only life with his wife:

I am happy to let you all know that my wife and I have been anal only for 7 months. She hasn’t felt or wanted my cock in her pussy at all. She has been having multiple orgasms without any clitoral stimulation at all and she has been loving it and so have I.

Continue reading the comments on the Anal Only Lifestyle forum

Message: Happy

Gia: I’m so happy and excited and I don’t really have anyone else I can share this with so I thought I’d share it with all you! I’ve followed this blog for years and have always wanted to be anal only since I found out it was a thing, but I couldn’t ever find a guy that was into it as much as I was and they’d try it for a while but would want to go back to pussy eventually, or would keep rubbing and touching me there when I didn’t want that, so it never really worked out for long.

But around the beginning of the year I started seeing this guy I met on Tinder and I decided to tell him right away that I was looking for a guy who was only into anal because I was an anal only girl. He said that he preferred anal too, and he hadn’t ever been in an anal only relationship but he’d love to try it. I was hopeful but a little bit skeptical, since guys before had been positive about it at first before changing their mind and wanting my pussy again.

My new boyfriend, though, if anything he’s gotten even more into it than I was since we’ve started it together. He loves it, he fucks my ass almost every day and loves stretching and gaping me and filling me with his cum, and he tells me how much my ass turns him on and how he wishes he’d met me sooner so he’d have learned how good it is to be anal only.

And best of all, he doesn’t touch or lick or play with my pussy or clit at all, and he helps me from doing it too, we work together to be better at anal only and it’s amazing. We really are like two partners working towards the goal of staying with only pure anal pleasure always! I can cum from anal almost every time we have sex now, and not using my clit for months has been amazing. I’m so happy to have him and to finally be my anal only self.

That’s so wonderful that you’ve found a partner who not only respects your anal only needs and wishes, but who is enthusiastic about the anal only lifestyle himself and helps reinforce and strengthen your commitment to anal only. That’s what makes a great sexual partnership, and I’m sure you’re going to enjoy a long and happy anal only relationship together!

Edging Without Clit Stimulation When You’re Anal Only

With orgasm denial and edging play a popular practice for many people, some wonder how to effectively put edging into practice while living the anal only lifestyle, and as much as being anal only appeals to them, the exclusion of clit stimulation makes continued edging for them to be difficult to implement.

Firstly, always remember that you can absolutely be anal only while continuing to use clit stimulation as needed, especially if only using it to edge and build up your arousal for anal. “Anal only” refers to excluding vaginal penetration, and any other variations beyond that are optional and highly variable based on personal preference.

However, if you are committed to excluding clit stimulation entirely, you can still edge with just anal stimulation, even if you don’t know how to orgasm from it yet. It can be a somewhat different experience, and you may need to adjust your expectations a little bit, and start out just by telling yourself that what you’re doing really is edging, but the more you do it, the more it will completely fill whatever role clit edging did for you in the past.

Putting your clit as far from your mind as you can, just start out by gently rubbing and fingering your anus until you’re totally warmed up and relaxed, and then start probing with a finger or a toy in order to find the most pleasurable spot to focus on and start building the pleasure by doing this, but without letting yourself get to orgasm. Any time your clit calls out for attention, focus on your ass even more instead, and as your arousal builds over time and between sessions, answer the call of your clit by fingering and fucking your ass instead.

The more you experiment with this, the more you’ll learn just how satisfyingly unsatisfying it can be in just the way you crave from edging, and you’ll find that you don’t need your clit at all, even to edge yourself or build your arousal—your asshole can be your source of arousal instead.