Month: January 2020


Message: New Goal for an Anal Only Marriage

Anonymous: My girlfriend and I got together 6 years ago. She didn’t have much sexual experience when we met, but during those years, little by little, I got her into anal, then anal only, then strict clitoral denial, then casual ass to mouth, then finally orgasm denial (she still has anal orgasms occasionally, but they happen when they happen, I never get out of my way to cause them, and I don’t behave differently when they do).

To me, she’s now the perfect girlfriend, and I actually proposed her! We’re getting married in about three months.

So far, we always had goals in our relationship, and for our marriage, we’d like to try new goals… but I’m perfectly happy, so I’m not sure what I could add, haha! We both love all your blogs, and we wondered if you could suggest something, a new goal to start our marriage. That’d please us very much.

We’re monogamous, not into dirty play or water sports. You probably guessed that my girlfriend is submissive – she wasn’t at first, but she got more and more submissive (both in and out of bed) and slutty as soon as we started clitoral denial. It boomed even more after orgasm denial.

What would you suggest? Thanks, and keep up the good work!

It sounds like you have a wonderful relationship and a wonderful fiancée, thank you for sharing your experiences and your progress together.

Committing to an anal only marriage and a life of pure anal together seems a pretty great goal in and of itself, and having a ceremony of your own after the main wedding where you pledge anal only to each other is something that some anal only couples like to do.

Beyond that, it sounds like you’re at a pretty great place already and should enjoy your ideal relationship and sex life. If there isn’t anything that stands out as something that you’d really like to do, there’s nothing wrong with just enjoying what you have together.

If you wanted to push her anal limits, you could explore larger toys or double anal with you and a toy. If she doesn’t wear a plug regularly, you could introduce long term plug wear into your routine. You could talk with friends and couples you know about the anal only lifestyle and work together to try and encourage other people to experiment with it and discover its benefits as well. You could symbolize your commitment to the anal only lifestyle with a set of chastity piercings.

If you do settle on something, or have any other questions, don’t hesitate to share or ask.

Message: First Ass to Mouth

Anonymous: I wasn’t planning to do this but now that it happened I’m kind of excited and proud about it and wanted to share. I was never into ass to mouth too much, I thought it looked hot in porn but was too scared to try it myself and thought it would be gross and the girls were just acting and pretending to enjoy it.

The other night I was having sex with my boyfriend in doggy and he pulled out of my ass and came around in front of me and held his cock in front of my face and it was so fast I just didn’t even think about it and started sucking. By the time my lips and tongue were around his cock, I realized what I was doing, but by then I was already committed and I also realized that not only was it not bad at all, it actually tasted pretty fucking good and it was really turning me on to suck my ass juices off his cock. I actually kept sucking until he came, I got so into it knowing his cock had just been inside my asshole and making me cum.

Afterwards he kissed me and hugged me and told me how amazing and hot it was and I guess between how much I liked it when I didn’t think I would and how much it turned him on too, I’m going to be doing it a lot more now. Last night we fucked again and I asked him to pull out and let me suck on it a few times throughout to practice and get used to it when I wasn’t suddenly surprised by it, and I still really liked it. I never thought I’d say it, but I love the taste of my ass, it’s sweet and kind of amazing. And it’s a new way to add lube! I’m not sure who likes it more, him or me. But I’m glad he got me out of my comfort zone with it and had me try it.

Ass to mouth can be an amazingly fun and hot thing to do once you’ve tried it a few times, and a lot of girls resist the idea because they think it will be gross without ever even trying it, but as you’ve discovered, trying it even just a few times tends to dispel those ideas and open you up to doing it much more. The more you do it, the more hooked you’ll get on it!

The Growing Normalization of Anal Sex

As we move into a new decade, it’s interesting to look at the ongoing shifts in trends surrounding anal sex, and there have been some drastic shifts indeed in the past decade.

More than any time in recent history, a majority of young women are very open to anal play and anal sex. Rimming very publicly grew in popularity in recent years, but along with that—not quite as openly talked about, but much more open than in the past—is anal sex itself.

The reasons are no doubt multifold, including:

  • Increased representation of anal sex in porn, especially with a focus on women enjoying it and shifting away from the 90s and early 2000s cliche of women not enjoying anal and only suffering through it for guys. The current generation coming of age grew up watching porn, and most porn treats vaginal as nothing more than foreplay before the main act of anal, if it even includes vaginal at all. So anal is very normalized as one of, if not the, primary form of sex as a result.
  • The increased positivity in groups of friends surrounding anal as a result of their own exploration of it, and instead of discouraging each other from trying it, friends are openly promoting it and encouraging it to each other, sharing how good it is and how much more they like it than pussy.
  • Much more widely available and more accurate information on how to start having anal sex and enjoy it. Lots of girls are exploring it on their own before ever trying it with a guy, but even for those who don’t, it only takes a few seconds to find a basic guide to starting out with anal, so for anyone who takes the small effort to research before trying, it’s easy to have anal sex for the first time and not have it be a painful experience that turns them off the idea forever.

As we continue into the new decade, this current trajectory may get us to the point where anal widely becomes seen by most people as a completely normal form of sex, completely on the same level of vaginal sex, and not something cheaper, inferior, or just for special occasions. People who prefer anal will not be treated as unusual, but it will seem completely normal to have such a preference, as will making the choice to be anal only and forego vaginal entirely—after all, most people don’t think it’s strange currently to be vaginal only and refuse anal, so why should it be the same for anal?

From there, a worthy goal would be to shift the normalization of anal even further until it is treated as the default for everyone, and vaginal recedes until it is seen as a less normal act, reserved for when a couple decides to have kids and wants to get pregnant.

What signs and evidence have you seen suggesting the increasing normalization of anal sex and the anal only lifestyle? Leave a comment to share!

Article: 6 Benefits of Anal Sex

According to a 2012 study by Indiana University, more people are having anal sex. While the 1990s only saw roughly one-quarter to one-third of men and women having tried anal, by 2009 that percentage had jumped to 40 to 45 percent. But while that may the case, anal sex is still, as Salon reported in 2012 “Science’s Last Taboo.” We know that some people are having it, but it’s not very likely that people are willing to talk about it. Somewhere between the poop rumors and the embarrassment of liking butt stuff, people go mum.

But, as is the case with sex in general, anal shouldn’t be a source of shame. Ever. If you like anal sex, you’re not the first or the last one to do so. Both men and women the world over enjoy anal play because it can be very pleasurable when done correctly. Although that’s a fact and I can find you easily a dozen women in the next 10 minutes who agree, anal sex has yet to really be embraced by the sexual mainstream. It’s on its way there, but it’s still inching along very slowly.

The article then goes on to list six benefits of anal sex and why you should be doing it if you aren’t already.

Continue reading on Bustle

Reddit: Why Anal Only?

A Reddit user asks:

I understand that it removes the condoms and pregnancy scares but why are you Anal Only (for what I’ve seen years) with no PIV or even clit stimulation? What about orgasm?

Several people respond and share their perspectives:

Keep in mind that most of the people on here are straight guys and couples, and that not everyone disses clit stimulation, and that some people can orgasm from only anal stimulation.

When I met my wife she’d had quite a few sexual partners prior as had I. She told me she wanted something only we could have have and she suggested on our wedding night that she’s give up her anal virginity.

Turns out she had the most mind blowing experience and an orgasms unlike she’d ever had before..

We had discussed prior to the wedding and we decided we weren’t going to have kids and we decided that night we’d be anal only from the night forward.

It’s been almost 6 years and I haven’t touched her pussy since

I’m AO because PIV is quite uncomfortable for me. I do some clit stimulation because I do enjoy that. There isn’t like a clear set rules. Do whatever works best for you and your partner.

Personally the only time in my life I was in a situation where I could REGULARLY have anal sex with a girlfriend she could orgasm from anal. Mentally we both loved that her pussy went unused, was just dripping wet and oozing grool as I was using her ass.

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit

Article: Why do People Like Anal?

First of all, some people enjoy the “full” feeling that they get from anal sex. Because the anal sphincter (which is a fancy way of saying butthole) is smaller and tighter than the vaginal opening, the feeling of being penetrated there can be more intense experience. Additionally, in AFAB people, the rectum runs right alongside the vagina, with a thin layer of skin between them. That means that anal stimulation can also stimulate the vagina and even the internal parts of the clitoris. Basically, there are a bunch of different nerves down there that can feel really good when stimulated.

Other common reasons people might like anal are psychological. For some people, anal sex is still a “dirty” or “naughty” sex act — and that feeling of transgressing rules or boundaries turns them on. This is a really common sexual response, to the point of being cliché. (Think of the male CEO who visits a dominatrix for a clear representation of how breaking society’s rules can be a turn-on.)

And, finally, an AFAB person might like anal sex because they can’t get pregnant from it. For some people, taking that particular worry off their shoulders can be enough to heighten sexual arousal.

Continue reading on Bustle

Message: Learned to Love Anal Only

Anonymous: I wanted to share something that happened to me this year and I didn’t expect to happen. I’d always liked anal (what guy doesn’t, right?) but thought of it as something to do on special occasions or when a girl was on her period. In retrospect, I sort of cheapened it by seeing it as something lesser than what I still thought of as the normal way to have sex, vaginal.

Anyway, I started seeing this girl earlier this year who told me the first night we had sex that she wanted to do anal and I of course agreed, then over the next few dates she wanted me to always do anal only, and after three or four times she said she wanted to be anal only and not have vaginal at all. I’d never heard of this before, but she convinced me to try it (she can be very convincing) and we did it for the next month.

Now, I thought I was going to get tired of it and would want to go back to her pussy. After all, I thought vaginal sex was the way everyone was supposed to be having sex and anal was just a rare thing to do, not a staple of sex. But, every time we did anal, it got better. And soon, it was way better than most vaginal sex I’d ever had. And I wasn’t getting bored or tired, I was getting more into it and the idea of only doing anal was making a lot more sense. I was really questioning everything and wondering why I’d never tried this before.

Needless to say, by the time we’d finished her little challenge to me, I was sold. We hardly even needed to talk about it, we both knew we were going anal only. I’d never even fucked her pussy once and I was ready to agree to never do it!

We’re still together and still anal only about nine months later, and I honestly think I would have a hard time going back to vaginal sex now. I’ve really fallen for her, but also for the anal only lifestyle. We’ve been reading your blog for a while, and we really like the Anal Only 2020 challenge. We’re already anal only, but we agree that it’s the future of sex, and we’re making a pledge to stay anal only together and never have vaginal sex. I hope lots more couples do the same, and more guys consider going anal only and don’t just think of it as an occasional treat on top of vaginal like I used to.

Congratulations on finding someone who was able to challenge you in ways that made you better and opened you up to the anal only lifestyle. That can be hard to find, but it’s so rewarding when you find it.

And thank you for sharing your goals for 2020 and beyond. It’s good to see people embracing the idea of an anal only future.

Reddit: Tips and Opinions on Solo Play

It’s been two months since I haven’t used my dildo in my pussy. It’s now exclusively for anal play, and it’s been great. However, I haven’t had an orgasm just using it alone — I always have my nipple clamps on (an absolute must since I love the pain) and a vibrator on my clit, sometimes rubbing it with just my finger.

Do you have any tips to achieve orgasm with just solo anal play? I’m gonna try doing it tonight — firstly putting my nipple clamps on and then starting slowly with anal beads. After that I’ll go in with my dildo and try my best not to touch my clit. I can’t wait!

Continue reading on /r/analonlylifestyle on Reddit

Our Guide is an Ebook Now!

If you’ve followed us for a while, you’re probably familiar with our Guide to Anal Sex and the Anal Only Lifestyle, which has been a part of this website for the past year since moving off Tumblr.

It’s always going to be a freely available resource as part of this blog for those who want to learn more about anal sex and the anal only lifestyle, but I’m happy to announce that you can also purchase it in an ebook format through Amazon as well, if that’s how you prefer to do your reading!

It can be a good resource if you’re just getting started, and it can make a good gift for friends who might be interested in anal or going anal only. Either way, it helps support this blog and the greater anal only community.

And, if you’re looking for another way to support the anal only community, consider becoming a Patron!