Anal Only Isn’t (Always) A Kink

A lot of people approach the anal only lifestyle as a kink, another facet in their sex life that they choose to incorporate because it’s exciting or new or relates to other kinks they have. And there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s perfectly valid to do it for that reason. But it’s not the only reason that people are anal only.

Inherent Anal Attraction

There are many out there, men and women both, who early in their life discovered that their primary attraction and sexual interest was in anuses and anal play rather than vaginal. Over time and further exploration, this inherent attraction grows into full grown preference for anal over vaginal and gets reinforced by increased experiences.

Whether truly inherent from birth or shaped by early experiences and physical differences from person to person, the result is a total preference for anal sex and an inability to be truly happy with or satisfied by vaginal. That’s not a kink, it’s just a reality.

Medical Reasons for Anal Only

From natural physical differences that make vaginal sex less pleasurable, or even painful, to changes over time, there are many different medical reasons for women to primarily or exclusively focus on anal sex rather than vaginal.

Vaginismus, various forms of vaginal agenesis, and other medical conditions that make vaginal penetration extremely painful or even impossible, lead to a lot of young women taking the anal route instead when they start having sex. Some undergo treatment to make vaginal sex possible, but it’s still common to prefer anal instead—both because it may be what they started with first and learned to enjoy more easily, and because it’s just the more natural option for them.

After women give birth, it’s very common for vaginal sex to no longer be as pleasurable or interesting for them. While not universally true, it’s a common complaint, and it’s becoming an increasingly common reaction to this to shift towards anal and the anal only lifestyle instead. It’s also very consistent with the idea that vaginal sex is for reproductive purposes, and once you’ve given birth and are no longer going to have any more children, there’s no reason to have vaginal sex anymore and should just focus on anal.

Older women as well can have difficulty enjoying vaginal sex, especially post-menopause, and often become much more open to trying anal instead, finding it much more pleasurable and appealing than vaginal.

Anal Is the Only Option

For gay men and a majority of trans women, anal can physically be the only option for sexual intercourse. This doesn’t make it any less special or ideal—it could be argued, in fact, that it just automatically eliminates inferior options and leaves them with the ideal form of sex right from the start—but it isn’t a choice for them, and so the idea of treating it as a sort of kink is incorrect here as well.

Vaginal is a Kink Too

The only reason that people don’t see a vaginal-centric lifestyle as a kink is because our culture still treats vaginal as the normal default. But in an anal-centric world, choosing to have vaginal sex recreationally would be seen as a strange kink in the same way that vaginal-centric people see the anal only lifestyle as such.

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