Message: My Wife Won’t Accept That We Should Do Anal

Anonymous: My wife won’t do anal. She just won’t. I’ve tongue penetrated her, fingered her butt, but she just won’t accept that my cock should enter her fuck hole. I’m getting to a point where I’m divided between to bad options: either I rape her anally, or I cheat on her with a proper girl, that accepts the true purpose of her ass hole. I don’t know what to do.

You’re approaching this with a terrible attitude, and neither of your supposed options have any merit, but the fact you considered them enough to mention them is telling. Your real options are to talk to her about it, express that you really want to share anal pleasure with her and ask if she’ll ever be willing to consider it and what her concerns are about it.

If she isn’t willing to ever consider it, you have to decide how important anal is to you compared to the rest of your relationship. If it’s less important, accept that she won’t do anal and move on together from there. If it’s more important, then you’ll have to reconsider the relationship.

I fear you may be using some of the language from this blog as a sort of justification of a perceived right to have anal sex, and I want to clear up the fact that this blog in no way advocates a sense of anal entitlement with any person who doesn’t share an interest in anal sex, and everyone needs to be entirely on board with the idea. Some people are uninterested, and nothing you do is going to make them want it. You probably can’t change that. They can, if they want to, but it can take a lot for some people if a fear/hatred of the idea is deeply ingrained. Pushing her on it is probably going to make her push back harder. Having an honest, level-headed conversation without making her feel resented by you or resentment towards you might get you somewhere, at least in terms of understanding her resistance to it.

The original version of this post on Tumblr received the following responses.

curiousobuI ecperienced a similar situation for many (more than 10) years. Talikubg did not help, made it worse. Key was to let her discover herself, feeling comfortablr about her own body. Starting point was that I started to use a plug myself, triggering her curiosity, and then it took 3 more years to make it a common practice between us, with much of shared pleasure.

mastersheavyangel: I just have to say, I see doom for this if the OP can’t change his attitude. Rape is rape, regardless of your beliefs, and if you feel so strongly about anal sex that you’re willing to force a woman to choose between this and either rape or a cheating spouse, then you might want to reassess your relationship. If you rape your wife, she can have you charged and this can be used as evidence of intent. If you cheat, depending on your residency and whether you have kids, you could stand to lose a lot, not just the marriage. I’d encourage you to think with a brain, and not a libido and sense of entitlement.

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