Month: January 2017

Message: Dream of Staying a Vaginal Virgin and Having It Sewn Shut

Anonymous: I’m 20 and from a religious family. I’m now away from home at college but still a virgin. Originally I was going to stay virginal until marriage, and then I found this blog (and a couple of similar ones). Now I am thinking about living my whole life as a virgin, and finding a husband who wants an anal-only woman. The thought of it brings such intense emotions, I dream of having my vagina sewn shut and somehow having my hymen thickened so it will never tear. What should I do?

cute-submissive-nyc-universe: Thanks for getting in touch and sharing. While I’m sure many guys would be delighted to meet someone who was anal only and a vagina virgin – and who wanted to remain that way – there are certain experiences that you, as a woman, should experience. And that means vagina sex. If after trying that you would prefer to be anal only, then fine. But I suggest you try everything else first. It could also make your future chastity more profound too. But all best wishes on your life journey.

I’ll offer a related but slightly alternate opinion: if you would like to experience vaginal sex and see what it’s like, then by all means do so. If you would instead like to be anal only and remain a vaginal virgin, that’s fine too. At some point in the future, you might change your mind, and if you then want to try vaginal sex at that point, there’s nothing wrong with that either. None of these is wrong or bad, in my opinion, you just need to figure out what works for you and what you want. And keep yourself open to the possibility that you might change your mind and your desires can evolve in the future, and that’s okay too.

Message: Extended Butt Plug Use

Anonymous: I was wondering if you know anything about extended plug use? Like always wearing one to sleep and wearing one during the day. I enjoy it but I was wondering if there are any negatives?

If it’s comfortable for you and doesn’t start to hurt, there are no negatives. Wear it for as long as you like. It’s not going to make you gape open permanently or be loose long term. If it starts to hurt, however, or feels like it’s cutting off circulation in any way, take it out for a while and try again after a break.

Message: Preparation Before Anal

Anonymous: So my boyfriend and I are going to try anal for the first time next week. How should I prepare myself so I’m cleaned out, since we are going out to dinner beforehand?

Go to the bathroom before you go to dinner, and you could use a small douche with warm water to flush out just your rectum, no deeper, an hour or so before you leave. Leave a little buffer time in there to make sure to get all the water out, but if you just use a very small amount a few times, you should be fine. You may want to practice using an anal douche in advance to know what to expect.

If you’re used to wearing a butt plug, you might try wearing it in advance, either before going to dinner or even during. Removing it in the restroom before sex can give you a chance to make a final cleanliness test, or alternatively you could use a dildo briefly in the restroom before for that purpose.

Message: How to Meet Someone New and Go Anal Only?

Anonymous: It sounds really great to meet someone new and go anal only, but how do you go about that?

Meet someone new, get to know them over a few dates, and if you both like each other and decide to start talking about sex, bring up that you don’t do vaginal sex, only anal and oral. Don’t bring it up too soon, just when sex would naturally come up. Not everyone will be okay with this—expect that and be gracious about it. But some will, and depending on your location, potentially even more than you would expect will be at least curious about it and open to giving it a shot if they like you.

Message: Going Anal Only With a New Partner

Anonymous: Meeting with a new Daddy next weekend and we’re going anal only? I’ve no interest in him using my pussy and neither does he, which is super exciting! I still need my clit to cum but he’s fine with that. I love your blog?

Congratulations, that’s wonderful! It sounds like you’re both in for a lovely time, and I wish you the best of luck. Thank you for sharing.

Message: Nick In Metal of Butt Plug Safe?

ditzystella: hello! so i am wondering if a little tiny nick in the metal is ok for my princess plug? still safe to use as far as you know? thanks! your friendly neighborhood anal only bimbo slut

It depends on the nick—if it’s sharp or rough in any way, I wouldn’t use it as-is, because you don’t want to cut or irritate yourself with it. If it’s something you can feel but doesn’t really catch your finger as you rub it over from any angle, it’s probably fine.

Message: Getting My First Plug Today

deniedbydaddy: My dom and I are thinking of trying anal and possibly anal only. I’m getting my first butt plug today and I was wondering if you had any tips or advice? Also, can you fart? No one ever talks about that part. Love your blog thanks!

Firstly, good luck and enjoy your explorations with anal and AO!

I would generally only suggest silicone, glass or metal plugs. Lower grade materials can be cheaper, but usually are not as safe to use or may cause irritation and discomfort. Note that silicone toys usually cannot be used with silicone lubricant.

Don’t go too small or too big for your first plug—something with the widest part not much bigger than the neck will make it uncomfortable to keep in for long and hard to retain without it wanting to slip out all the time. If you’ve done anal play with fingers or other toys, you can probably get a good idea of what size you can comfortably fit based off that experience, and go for a plug around that size or a bit larger.

Yes, you can still pass gas with a plug in. Some plugs are designed specifically to make this easier, but that isn’t strictly necessary. Pressing on the plug, or sitting down with it, can release some of its sealing effect if necessary.

Message: Going Slow With Anal Only

Anonymous: My boyfriend and I have been interested into trying a month of anal only to see how it goes and we have been taking it slow to make sure I don’t get hurt and he doesn’t hurt himself either but we have run into an issue. Because of taking it slow he has an issue with staying hard enough (we really haven’t done anal much so he has to be 100% hard to get it in) and then I get turned off bc I feel like it’s my fault any advice?

Only go as slowly as you need to. If you’re fine and it isn’t hurting, you can try to go faster. You don’t need to go slowly just for the sake of going slowly, you should just listen to your body and what it needs, and go slowly when necessary but not when you’re fine. You can also warm up with some solo play and by wearing a butt plug before having sex so you’re more ready from the start.