Message: Tips To Make First Time Anal Easier
surfershane: Just wondering if you can pass on any tips to make first time anal easier and enjoyable
Lots of practice/training/warmup, butt plugs, lube, and the recipient in control at first the first few times you fuck.
The anal sphincter needs to be relaxed in order to loosen. It’s the opposite of most other muscles in that its natural state is to be tight and rigid and it softens/loosens when “flexing” it. Some of its looseness can be voluntarily controlled (with practice) while some is involuntary. So you need to practice to increase your voluntary control while also working up the size of objects you can fit inside over a period of weeks or more. Start with a finger. Just one. Combine it with other stimulation, especially at first, to help make the anal penetration feel better and start building an association of anal with pleasure. Once comfortable with one, work up to a second finger. Keep on going up to three or four, only adding another when ready and backing off if it hurts.
Once you can fit three or four, it’s time for a butt plug. There are a lot out there, and the best are stainless steel, silicone or glass. A lot of the really cheap ones are made from unsafe or otherwise inferior materials that smell bad and can in some cases have bad skin reactions and burn. There are some good ones that aren’t too expensive, though—the Tantus Ryder is a very nice small/medium silicone plug you can get for around $20. Wearing a plug during oral, masturbation, and other sexual activities is a great way to warm up for the main event of anal. It’s also great to wear one for a while before sex, or even while doing other non-sexual things. Plugs really help develop voluntary muscle control that makes future sex easier.
Incorporating some sort of anal stimulation regularly during sex and masturbation will greatly speed up both an attraction to/enjoyment of anal and the ease with which it’s possible to move on to actual sex.
Once comfortable with objects close to the size of a penis, it’s time to try the real thing. It’s usually good for the person being penetrated to be in control at first when starting out, so they can control the speed, depth and angle of penetration and stop if anything hurts. If there is pain, just stop immediately wait in place a moment until it fades, then resume. You can also back off slightly before pausing and then push forward again. Once fully penetrated as far as comfortably possible, wait a minute or so, then slowly increase speed. After a few minutes, the penetrator can usually take control but needs to be very mindful of comfort and stop if anything hurts.