Month: October 2013

Message: Opposition to Anal Illogical

Anonymous: Why do you suppose there are so many opposed to anal sex? In real life people saying its bad when they haven’t tried it or those on the net who make up stuff about it being harmful? Anyone who’s tried it must surely realize all this is bullshit but also once you’ve tried it why wouldn’t you want to repeat it? It just puzzles me as the whole argument against isn’t logical.

People who are improperly introduced to anal tell all their friends that it hurts, and when those friends are asked to try it, they don’t want to because they incorrectly think it’s going to hurt and look up evidence about how it’s harmful, which they then spread further. In reality, prolapse and fissures are not caused by normal anal sex that’s been properly prepared for—people who have such issues usually were already prone to them and it would’ve happened without the anal sex.

I don’t think there are many people who have had anal sex and enjoyed it who spread fear and misinformation about it, unless they’re lying to themselves and trying to convince themselves it’s bad and they shouldn’t have it, for other reasons.

Message: Fiance Doesn’t Do Anal

lick-the-assI recently have gotten engaged and my fiance doesn’t do anal. She said she’s tried it before (not with me) and she didn’t like it at all. She knows I’ve done it but doesn’t know how much I love everything about it, the licking, fingering, and the actual fucking. How do you think I could convince her to let me play with her beautiful asshole?

Well, first up you need to tell her what you just said: that you love everything about it and want to do so with her because you love her and everything about her. That is the first step, and important because you’ve just committed to someone without being entirely open about your preferences. Being sexually compatible is key to having a happy and successful relationship.

As for her not liking anal, it is likely she had a bad experience with a guy who didn’t know what he was doing. This does make progress much harder I’m sorry to say.

Talk to her, tell her what you like and how much it means to you. If you are getting married the there must be give and take on both sides. See if she’ll let you caress her asshole during oral or sex. Then if all goes well after a few weeks see if she’ll let you lick her there.

Good luck.

Message: Anal Only More Aligned With Traditional Gender Roles?

Anonymous: Interesting discussion. I might get blasted for this but I think most would be anal only if they accepted that it’s healthier and more in line w the role of the genders, which is why it makes the hormones feel on fire. For guys, anal is perfectly designed to please the cock without risk of pregnancy while eliciting a feeling of power and control. For females, anal creates intense physical sensations while eliciting a feeling of being protected by a strong male. Nature gears us to anal.

No Pussy November

Join us in making next month No Pussy November. If you aren’t already in an anal only relationship, this is your chance to give it a try for one month. We’re announcing this two weeks in advance to give everyone a chance to make their plans and talk to their partners about the idea. On the first of November, everyone participating should cease having vaginal sex and focus on anal instead. At the end of the month, it’s up to you whether you return to vaginal or stay anal only.

Be sure to submit your stories here over the next month and a half, and beyond, and ask any questions you may have.

Message: Misinformation Keeps People From Doing Anal

Anonymous: I think both sexes are being held back and are fighting their natural instincts to fuck anally due to misinformation. The results are pent up aggression in boys and low levels of libido in girls, because neither find vaginal very satisfying. Although I know some will criticize this, you can see the difference simply by studying porn. You can really sense the extreme level of intense pleasure experienced by couples fucking anally whereas vaginal fuckers almost look robotic or bored.

Well, porn isn’t necessarily real, they’re actors and can be quite good at acting in ways that we want to see. However, talk to real people who do both regularly and know what they’re doing with anal, and most will agree: anal is far more pleasurable and satisfying than vaginal.

Quote: Rimming is a Requirement for Millennial Girls

denverprostitute: Guys, keep in mind [that rimming] is nearly a requirement in this day in age, especially with us Millennial girls. I will not ever date a guy that has a hangup with licking and tonguing my ass. Trust me, the reward for a top notch rimjob is pretty much any sexual desire you may have in return. It’s the one thing that makes me lose complete control and sends me into a sexual frenzy.

Message: Wife Agrees to Go Anal Only

Anonymous: Hi there, a few days ago I discovered your blog and I found it inspiring. I made the courage to ask my wife to go anal only and she agreed, which made me doubtful. Two years ago she never wanted to hear about anal, but bit by bit we started to do it 4 months ago. For the last 2 months, we did mostly anal and that’s why I decided to “pop the question”. When I asked her how does she feel about it, she said it’s “convenient” for us and she doesn’t mind A or V. “Convenient”??? Is that good or bad?

Congratulations! You have a wonderful wife.

Lots of women start out with the default position “I’m never going to like anal”, but once gently introduced they can slowly warm to it. In many cases coming to prefer it over vaginal.

However, the psychology for some (not all) is that having backed themselves into this position, it can be awkward to openly admit at first to liking anal. So we get “neutral” words like “convenient”, which give assent without having to come out and say so.

So my take on this is that its a good sign. After all, she says he doesn’t mind A or V

You’re both going to have a great time going anal only.

The Normalization of Anal Sex

In just a few decades the number of women who have tried anal has gone up to almost half. Probably the number in anal only relationships has risen proportionately. I wonder if it will ever become dominant? It surely has to eventually.

The precis: We’re all having more sex, and more kinds of sex than ever before, and we’re getting sexually active at younger ages. But the “big story,” as Slate writer William Saletan puts it, is anal sex! In 1992, a similar survey found that 16 percent of women aged 18-24 had tried it. Now the number is more like 40 percent. And in 1992, the highest percentage of women in any age group who admitted to anal sex was 33 percent. Now it’s 46.

Saletan goes on to say: “The last time I looked at the anal sex data, I figured that most women who reported having done it meant they’d tried it just once. I was wrong. … One-third of these women say they’ve done it in the last month. Among all women surveyed, the number who reported anal sex in their most recent sexual encounter was three percent to four percent. That’s a lot of butt sex. And remember, this is what women are reporting. If anything, they’re probably understating the truth.”

The evidence also appears to support the many anecdotes out there regarding anal sex resulting in more orgasms for women:

“Among women who had vaginal sex in their last encounter, the percentage who said they reached orgasm was 65. Among those who received oral sex, it was 81. But among those who had anal sex, it was 94. Anal sex outscored cunnilingus.”

The article (which is fairly anti-anal) tries to explain it away by saying that anal is only being added onto other sexual acts in the study and it wasn’t the anal that caused the orgasms.